Difficulty with guilt.

So, I feel guilty.  And I know I shouldn’t, and I don’t want to feel guilty.

I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend, and I enjoyed every second of it. After reading Jessica Valenti’s The Purity Myth last year, any reservations about giving up abstinence until marriage flew out the window: I knew that I didn’t need to wait until I was married, I knew that I wanted to wait until the right moment with the right guy, and it happened. This is my problem: I feel guilty- dirty, like I did something I shouldn’t— even though I definitely am down with the choices I made.  I’m pretty sure the guilt I’m experiencing is leftover from being raised in a sex-hating household (my mom believes that all sex is a curse, and my upbringing reflects that).  I am expected by my family and some of my friends to wait until I’m married to have sex- and they think anyone who does otherwise is used up and dirty.

Have any of you dealt with this before? How did you cope/how are you coping? Was there anything specifically that you read that helped you get over it– I know that I’m not a used piece of gum or a dirty person just because I had sex. I do not regret having sex….I am having trouble reconciling the way I used to think with the way I do now, I guess.

Thoughts?

Happy Holidays!!!!