Forget Breastfeeding…

The most controversial parenting (mothering) decision these days is whether or not to have your children vaccinated against H1N1.  This may not sound like a feminist issue, but I believe it is. It is assumed that the decision itself rests primarily with the mother, and being able to make (and carry out) an informed decision may, I believe, often be reserved for those with educational and socioeconomic privilege.

Lately, every mother I see, every gathering I find myself in, somehow manages to work into the conversation the dangers of Swine Flu either lurking in the virus itself or in the vaccine designed to prevent the virus from harming us.  Everyone has an opinion and everyone wants to know if you are on the same side of the debate.

Are you getting it?  Are your kids getting it?  Have you looked at the studies on the adjuvant?  Etc.  Strangely, these questions are all directed at me.  My husband – and equal parenting partner – is largely absent from these conversations.  This is not usually because he’s literally absent.  It is because, as with many other parenting decisions, it is assumed that this decision rests with the mother alone. She is the one in charge of the children’s health, she’s the one who makes appointments with the doctor and keeps track of allergies, weight gain, developmental milestones and, naturally, she is the one researching the pros and cons of a much anticipated vaccine. This is obviously problematic.  The flip side of this sort of assumption is that if the wrong choice is made, she is to blame.  If a child is/is not vaccinated and something goes wrong as a result, it is the mother’s fault. 

Secondly, the way information has been disseminated (at least where I live) reflects some privilege of socio-economic status and education.  Information is presented in our national newspaper and in talks at the local university, but not, as far as I can tell, in community centers, grocery stores and bus stops.  Having the choice to have our children vaccinated meant that during the early weeks of the vaccination campaign, a parent needed to schedule at least several hours off work to take the children to one of the few vaccination clinics (many of which were not easily accessible by public transit).  Although things have improved considerably in recent weeks, it is certainly a minority of families in which one parent can afford the time (and potentially lost income) of taking a day off work to wait in line for a vaccine.

The panic I see in my immediate peer group has, in many cases, given way to hysteria.  Danger is everywhere.  Every doorknob, every child with a runny nose, every seat on the bus, every book in the library must be looked at with suspicion (and not touched!).  Everything has the potential (however small) of carrying the virus.  Of course, this is no more or less true than any other virus circulating around us all the time.  H1N1 may potentially have more risks once acquired, but the risk *of exposure itself* remains similar.  Interestingly, I think this is the sort of paranoia reserved for those who have the luxury of time and choice. 

My husband and I have flexible work hours that allow us to take the time required to have our children vaccinated if we so choose without fear of lost income (or lost employment), we have the good fortune of knowing people who are trained as scientists and can offer us various perspectives on this vaccine, and we have backgrounds that allow us to adequately research H1N1 and come to what we believe is a sound, informed decision.

In short, we are privileged.  However, the judgment that comes from both sides of this debate appears directed primarily at mothers, regardless of privilege.  Though I don’t find this surprising, I do find it irritating.  I am not the only person in charge of my family’s health and it is not solely my responsibility to keep my children out of harm’s way.

[cross-posted at youngfeministmother.blogspot.com]