Rush’s “I’m sorry for calling you a slut because it provoked a boycott” apology doesn’t stop AOL pulling advertising

So far, a total of eight companies– Carbonite, Citrix, Go To Meeting, Legal Zoom, ProFlowers, Quicken Loans, Sleep Number, Sleep Train and, as of today, AOL–have pulled advertising from Rush Limbaugh’s radio show over the Viagra-popping hate jockey’s mysoginist statements about Sandra Fluke, which include calling her a slut and prostitute and imploring her to film herself having sex. The media is saying that Rush Limbaugh has apologized. But I don’t think the following is an apology, do you?

In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke.

I think it is absolutely absurd that during these very serious political times, we are discussing personal sexual recreational activities before members of Congress. I personally do not agree that American citizens should pay for these social activities. What happened to personal responsibility and accountability? Where do we draw the line? If this is accepted as the norm, what will follow? Will we be debating if taxpayers should pay for new sneakers for all students that are interested in running to keep fit? In my monologue, I posited that it is not our business whatsoever to know what is going on in anyone’s bedroom nor do I think it is a topic that should reach a Presidential level.

My choice of words was not the best, and in the attempt to be humorous, I created a national stir. I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices. [my emphasis]

Let’s break down what Rush is saying. He is basically saying,

Dear Sandra, I’m sorry for calling you a slut, but I still think you are slutty, irresponsible and unaccountable and I still think women deserve to have to have their ovaries removed because of polycystic ovarian syndrome, which birth control could have prevented, and I still think women deserve to die of ovarian cancer, which birth control could have prevented. But I am sincerely sorry and regret calling you a slut because my doing so provoked a national boycott against my show. Please don’t take this as a personal attack. It was, of course, a personal attack, but let’s pretend it wasn’t. So, again, in conclusion, you are a slut but if I shouldn’t have called you that.

P.S. Please note, I’m only apologizing for the instance. I’m usually a standup guy. This was a totally isolated incident.

To honor Rush’s dishonesty, let us start using the term “Rushology” and the verb “to Rushologize.” A rushology is an insincere apology, which is belied by the very language of the apology. The regret of the rushologist may be sincere, but it is a self-interested regret, rather than remorse. We’ve all witnessed rushologies even if we didn’t realize it at the time. For instance, the 5-year old who is mean to a classmate and admonished by his teacher and “apologizes” because he doesn’t want to get into trouble is rushologizing. The rushology will often be accompanied by a refusal to make contact and a tone of voice that’s more appropriate for a death wish than an apology. A subtler more adult rushology may sound like this: “I’m sorry if you were offended by what I said.” To further familiarize readers with the word, I’ll give you some examples of more Rushologies. If Rush had said “I’m sorry you were offended that I called you a slut. Of course, If you weren’t a slut, you wouldn’t care,” he would have been rushologizing. If Rush has said “I’m sorry I asked you to film yourself having sex so I could watch it, but can you send it to me,” he would have been rushologizing.

You don’t have to be Rush Limbaugh to be a rushologist. Here are some rushologies anyone can say:

• I’m sorry I called your mom fat. When she wears yellow, I do confuse her with a school bus.
• I’m sorry for calling your mom a whore. She does sleep with people for money, but I chose the wrong words.
• I’m sorry I called you a dirty Jew. I would like to eliminate your kind with some sort of final solution, but I don’t mean this as a personal attack and I chose the wrong words.
• I’m sorry I threw sand in your eyes because my mom glared at me and this means she won’t buy me candy. If I had known she was looking, I wouldn’t have thrown sand in your face. But now that I’m not getting candy anyway, I’m going to bury your head in the sand. 
• I’m sorry I said I hope you die a violent death. I shouldn’t have said that. But I’m going to push you into oncoming traffic.

And here is Sandra Fluke, quite appropriately, not accepting Rush’s non-apology:

Let Sandra Fluke know you stand with her and encourage advertisers to stay away from Rush by signing this Think Progress petition.