Will.i.am doesn’t like women who have their own condoms and I don’t like him

Slut-shaming with a side of awful sex education? My favorite! Will.i.am of the Black Eyed Peas recently told Elle that he thinks women who have their own condoms are a total boner-killer.

ELLE: If you walked into a woman’s house, what one item would convince you that you weren’t compatible?

W: If she had condoms in her house, that would just fuckin’ throw me off. That’s just tacky.

ELLE: Well, okay, I could see if she had a candy bowl full of them on the coffee table. But if she’s got a few in a drawer, wouldn’t that simply suggest she’s health-conscious?

W: I just think, like, if you’re into someone and you guys get to that level, then that’s something you should converse about together and say, “Hey, maybe we should get some.” Another pet peeve is wet sinks.

Really? This is a thing that people think? I mean, intellectually I guess I knew that, but it still seriously blows my mind. I have condoms literally strewn around my room. Granted, they are gathering dust. But, goddamn it, I’m for sure going to be prepared should the opportunity arise.

Jamilah Lemox Lemieux, take it away…

“Keeping condoms in the house is not the signature behavior of a slut; it is a responsible action taken by a sexually active person. Whether you are in a monogamous relationship, sleeping around all over town or simply open to the possibility of having sex at some point, it’s good to be prepared. Men have been known to keep condoms not simply in their homes, but in their cars and wallets. This isn’t about suggesting that the onus of providing protection should be on the part of the man (or that a couple should purchase all prophylactics together); this is basically saying that women should not be able to make the decision to have sex as casually as men can. And that’s nonsense.”

Nonsense that not only shames women for being sexually active but also endangers their health. As my first act of what Andrea Plaid coined “skank solidarity,” I am gathering all the condoms in my apartment and putting them in a big candy bowl on my coffee table. There they will remain. Forevermore.

bowl of condoms

Dear will.i.am,
Please leave me my condoms and get your baby wipes outta my house.
Love, Maya

St. Paul, MN

Maya Dusenbery is an Executive Director in charge of Editorial at Feministing. She is the author of the forthcoming book Doing Harm: The Truth About How Bad Medicine and Lazy Science Leave Women Dismissed, Misdiagnosed, and Sick (HarperOne, March 2018). She has been a fellow at Mother Jones magazine and a columnist at Pacific Standard. Before become a full-time writer, she worked at the National Institute for Reproductive Health. A Minnesota native, she received her B.A. from Carleton College in 2008.

Maya Dusenbery is an Executive Director of Feministing in charge of Editorial.

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