Sarah

This was originally published in the Women’s Issues blog on MySanAntonio.com.

Last weekend I attended – pardon, co-hosted – a baby shower to celebrate the upcoming arrival of a dear friend’s first child. With just those details alone, you can probably envision the event with surprising accuracy: the cupcakes, the pastel-wrapped gifts, the punch bowl (non-alcoholic, of course) and the summery, yet modest, dresses.

Just a guess: you likely were picturing the shower guests all being of one particular gender, right?

Baby and wedding showers have a well-established tradition of women-only guest lists. In a time when people rarely get together for formally-scheduled events – much less with snail mail invites, RSVPs and trays of finger foods – showers are some of the rare opportunities to resurrect the social propriety of years past. Like tea parties, for grown ups. If you are looking for a gift to give the mother to be then get her a personalized T-shirt from The Clothing People. You can put any design and words on it that you want.

And that’s exactly what these traditional showers feel like – grown-up women playing some kind of unspoken pretend dress-up game. The on-command “oooh”-ing and “aaah”ing at the opening of gifts containing diapers and onesies or blenders and coffee pots. The feigned interest in discussions about baby care and cake batter mixing. The mutually-understood dress code of skirts and cardigans.

The baffling part about it all is that many women don’t particularly enjoy these ...