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By sark • 11 years ago

MESSAGE makes me happy

I was recently pointed to this website, by a male gamer, and may I just say that I am pleased? I’ve experienced some of the smaller forms of sexism in the pen and paper RPG community once or twice, but I’ve heard from people for whom it has been far worse, and it’s refreshing to see men taking a stand against not only sexism, but specifically rape culture. While their post explaining why they’ve positioned themselves as a men’s organization (MESSAGE stands for Men Ending Slurs and Sexist Attitudes in a Gaming Environment) has some problems that need addressing, the intent of the organization is refreshing.
By sark • 11 years ago

“Do you want me to pay for dinner?” and other awkward questions

An interesting point was recently brought to my attention by a male friend: it’s hard to respect someone’s expectations about things like going dutch and gestures like holding doors open when you don’t know what those expectations are, but asking about them can be awkward and come off as rude. When you’re dating in a pool that contains a wide spectrum of views on these subjects, how can you have a conversation about them early in a relationship without it getting weird? While this sort of question applies to everyone, it has specific relevance to heterosexual men, because they traditionally have the most distance from the feminist discussions on these subjects.

I don’t really have any deep insight into this question myself, ...

An interesting point was recently brought to my attention by a male friend: it’s hard to respect someone’s expectations about things like going dutch and gestures like holding doors open when you don’t know what those expectations ...
By sark • 12 years ago

Privilege and Literature

Watch this video.  Seriously, watch it. It is the best  explanation of privilege I have ever heard.  Though it begins with a discussion of the video game related incident posted about by Feministing community member inallsincerity  here, the meat of the video is an impassioned discussion of how privilege effects people’s experience of literature. The video maker discusses several facets of privilege and how it has colored his experiences with literature, from the prevalence of privileged perspectives in the academic literary canon to how if he had not read outside his demographic he would never have encountered amazing works of literature from Shakespeare to The Color Purple.  What struck ...

Watch this video.  Seriously, watch it. It is the best  explanation of privilege I have ever heard.  Though it begins with a discussion of the video game related incident posted about by Feministing community member ...
By sark • 13 years ago

Taking a Third Option on Abstinence

When I was around thirteen, I had my first encounter with an abstinence advocate.  Her name, I believe, was Casey, and she was a revelation.

Sitting among the other middle schoolers, I was convinced I knew all the answers.  I was one of those kids who took what was said in health class to heart, and I was already sure that I would “save myself” for marriage.  Casey, a dark haired young woman in a t-shirt and jeans, reinforced that belief — but she also made me start to think about sex as something that was special, not dirty.

“What can happen when you have sex?”  she asked the gathered students.  We dutifully ...

When I was around thirteen, I had my first encounter with an abstinence advocate.  Her name, I believe, was Casey, and she was a revelation.

Sitting among the other middle schoolers, I was convinced I ...