Casey E Bruce

I’ve read almost every ‘how-to’ guide for women about men out there: ”How to get your man to ask you to marry him,” “How to straddle your man like a pro,” “How to get your man to say the ‘L’ word,” or “How to be a woman in the streets and a freak in the sheets;” (yes, all real).

But I have never stumbled upon a how-to guide for us feminists, who need advice on how to talk to our boyfriends about the ‘f’ word. Like any woman, feminists also have expectations for their partner’s that sometimes can be difficult to articulate without the ‘Duh!,’ ‘Why don’t you get it?,’  ‘Common sense,’ face. I struggle with it all the time.

Like any issue you may be passionate about, we should spill our “feminist” beans to our boyfriends, not only so he knows our passion, but also so he can understand the issues.

So here it is, from one feminist to another—how to talk to your boyfriend about feminism, without seeming like a male-hating militant,  because let’s face it, stereotypes are real and he will initially think you are some version of a “he-man woman hater” (only opposite). I talked to three men about feminism—a boyfriend, ex-boyfriend and wise male-feminist friend. Here’s what they had to say:

Lead by Example.
Before you start down this long, egregious path of “You should be a feminist because…” you have to be willing to have a critical and respectful ...