The very irritating things people say

…and way too often:

“You’re lucky; you don’t need makeup.” Look, no one needs makeup.  No one.  There is not a single reason why any person needs to wear makeup.  It’s not necessary for cleansing your face (and only makes you need to clean your face), it’s not medicinal, it’s not a protectant (and sun screen is not makeup).  Unless you argue abstractly and want to talk about women getting fired in some field for not wearing it or something similar, no one needs makeup.  We all need to collectively start loving the faces we were born with and stop going to great lengths to cover it.  Men get to do it; why won’t we?  Let’s treat makeup like a fun way to be creative with our appearance that all people, including men, have the option to do, rather than a requirement or “need.”

Constantly remarking on how thin someone is. If you’re a part of civil society, you don’t do it to fat people; what makes anyone think thin people want someone remarking about their bodies non-stop?  This is especially true for men, as men are socially expected to be muscular and rather not thin.  It may be a more hurtful comment than you realize.

“Of course you pay for brunch, you’re a feminist!” Said by Dude to Feminist Female in a group I went to brunch with a while ago.  That kind of remark indicates that the speaker is of the impression that, all along, women have been fighting for our rights to completely swap roles with men, rather than be treated equally to men and given the same rights as men.  Feminists aren’t interested in “trading places” or ruling over men; feminists are interested in equality.  And who pays for brunch is dependent on a number of things that don’t have much to do with feminism these days.  Whoever has money pays for the damn brunch.

“Women should/do rule the world!” This is patronizing.  For one, saying that women should rule the world is to acknowledge that women don’t, and men do, and that you’re not terribly interested in women having equal power.  You probably also hate when women beat you at board games, even though you voted for Hilary.  Attitude also found in sitcoms where Doofy Husbands are present.

“If global warming is real, why is it snowing?” <a href=”http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1962294,00.html”>Because</a>:

While the frequency of storms in the middle latitudes has decreased as the climate has warmed, the intensity of those storms has increased. That’s in part because of global warming — hotter air can hold more moisture, so when a storm gathers it can unleash massive amounts of snow. Colder air, by contrast, is drier; if we were in a truly vicious cold snap, like the one that occurred over much of the East Coast during parts of January, we would be unlikely to see heavy snowfall.

Climate models also suggest that while global warming may not make hurricanes more common, it could well intensify the storms that do occur and make them more destructive.

But as far as winter storms go, shouldn’t climate change make it too warm for snow to fall? Eventually that is likely to happen — but probably not for a while. In the meantime, warmer air could be supercharged with moisture and, as long as the temperature remains below 32°F, it will result in blizzards rather than drenching winter rainstorms. And while the mid-Atlantic has borne the brunt of the snowfall so far this winter, areas near lakes may get hit even worse. As global temperatures have risen, the winter ice cover over the Great Lakes has shrunk, which has led to even more moisture in the atmosphere and more snow in the already hard-hit Great Lakes region, according to a 2003 study in the Journal of Climate.

“I don’t have a problem with gay people, as long as they don’t hit on me!” If you really don’t have a problem with gay people, then you would give no more of a flying crap if a person of the same sex hits on you than you would if someone of the opposite sex that you weren’t romantically or sexually attracted to hit on you.  Say there’s a het guy.  Some women are not attractive to said het guy.  All men are not attractive to het guy.  The two groups are the same and should be regarded as such.  There isn’t a reason to be more bothered by one than the other.

<a href=”http://zombiehero213.wordpress.com/2010/10/24/the-intolerant-left/”> “The left is intolerant!”</a>  What this really means is “the left is intolerant of my intolerance and I’m only pretending that ‘intolerance’ is a bad thing right now because I am out of of other arguments and thought maybe I could try to make the words ‘tolerance’ and ‘intolerance’ completely meaningless.”  The whole point of “tolerance” is the refusal to support intolerance.  “Tolerating intolerance” is oxymoronic.  And, while we’re on the subject, NPR wasn’t “intolerant” of Juan Williams.  NPR was intolerant of bigoted, harmful, and subjective opinions possibly representing their public- and member-supported news station.

“Oh, you must be on your period.” Usually said in response to a female display of anger or irritability, and usually by a man, but sometimes by a woman, which is very confusing.  Here’s the deal: what you mean to say is “Oh, you must be experiencing symptoms of PMS.”  (Although, please, just don’t bother saying anything in this situation regarding whether or not the woman is menstruating.)  PMS stands for Pre-Menstrual Syndrome.  Emphasis on the pre.  The presence of blood doesn’t create irritability (unless it the irritability experienced upon discovering you’ve got your period because of blood found somewhere it wasn’t supposed to be, like your new sheets, or underwear).  I won’t even get into the sexism present when theorizing about “menstruation” and “woman expressing emotion other than happiness.”  Let’s just work on accuracy first.

What other oxymoronic, ignorant, or ridiculous things do people say regularly that pisses you off?

(Cross-posted at my blog, <a href=”http://ethecofem.com”>ethecofem.</a>