Bro Culture

We’ve all met a Bro – that alpha male idiot, usually around 16-28 years old, who is generally inarticulate, belligerent, misogynistic, conceited, and thinks he’s way funnier than he actually is. Like boogers, Bros come in all shapes and sizes, but a dead giveaway that you have spotted a Bro is if you can smell the AXE body spray wafting through the air.
Bros are both societal flaws and evolutionary anomalies – detrimental to the general public by way of their refusal to progress. Part little boy, part pathetic beast, Bros frequently refer to sexual intercourse as ‘getting the kill,’ often ignoring the humanity of women in favor of believing vaginas are something to be conquered and dominated. Besides beer, partying, hooking-up with drunk women, and using the word “fag,” rating women based on physical attributes is their number one pastime.

Bro and Douchebag are synonymous.
Bros usually travel in packs to avoid getting picked off by greater foe, such as intelligent women and men. Often times, when a Bro approaches a potential sexual partner and is inevitably shot down, having his Bro Pack nearby gives him the confidence to shout out “Lesbian” or “Fatty” to the disinterested woman.
Some may assume most men in the 16-28 age bracket will invariably partake in Bro Culture, considering it a “Right Of Passage” for young men. That assumption may be encouraged by marketing campaigns targeting that age bracket, such as Carl’s Junior, AXE Body Spray, and Guinness to name a few, but the reality is that Bro Culture is increasingly detested among young men with the intelligence and self confidence to see through the seedy sheen of Bro “Awesomeness” for what it truly is: compensation for feelings of inadequacy and sheer idiocy. Sadly, most Bros are oblivious to this truth.
Bro Culture is not to be confused with comedies depicting male friendships such as “I Love You, Man,” “40 Year Old Virgin,” “Superbad,” etc. While those movies focus on male bonding, the main male characters tend to have a combination of traits ranging from honesty, femininity, intelligence, vulnerability, and respect for women (in some cases). Most Bros would consider those traits to be “gay.”
Bro Culture represents the worst aspects of perceived masculinity – bullying, egoism, domination, aggression, Neanderthal intellect, and sexual prowling. One might surmise that Bro Culture is an attempt to re-affirm the value of extreme masculinity within the context of women’s rights and the progressive role of women in society, but that’s giving Bro Culture way too much credit.
I’ve had enough of Bro Culture, especially the changing of words to include any variation of the word ‘Bro’ such as Brocabulary, BroBible, Bromance, Bromosapiens, etc. They might have started off mildly endearing and humorous, but now they are simply sad and embarrassing.