Aren’t I a real woman?

I realize that entering the healthy body image discussion with complaints about how tough it is to be thin is probably about on par with responding to women’s rights issues with “but men are discriminated against too!”

But bear with me.

My entire family is thin. My sisters are naturally about a size 2, and they’re both beautiful and healthy. I’m very thin – actually I’m underweight myself. Due to health problems (not a bad body image or an eating disorder) I’ve been unable to maintain a healthy weight for about a year now. 

I don’t like being underweight. When random people say “you’re so skinny!” to me, I honestly don’t know how to react. I assume they’re not insulting me, but it makes me insecure because I think I look too skinny and it’s kinda gross that my hips stick out. And it makes me feel guilty – I don’t want anyone to idealize my size. But a lot of people seem to think that because I’m a size 0, I must be uber-secure because, after all, my body type is glamourized on runways and billboards everywhere.

Here’s the thing – I consider myself a radical feminist and I don’t buy into fashion/entertainment/advertising industry bullshit that idealizes skin and bones and turns women against their bodies. I do, however, expect to find acceptance of all women in feminist circles. Too often, I see objections to the standards of thinness framed as promotions of “real women.” Essence magazine is celebrating “real women,” “real women” aren’t a size 0 and don’t look like models etc

We don’t need a Thin Acceptance Movement any more than we need the thinly veiled misogyny of MRAs. But come on, feminists. I thought that we were above talking about what “real women” act or look like. I’m a real woman, even though I’m underweight. My sisters are real women, even though they don’t have to work for their tiny waists. And yes, runway models are actually real women too.

Isn’t there a better way we can talk about a healthy body image?