New Favorite Tumblr: I Believe You, It’s Not Your Fault

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I Believe You | It’s Not Your Fault is a space for older folks to offer support to young people dealing with the bullshit of rape culture alone.

The site was started by Lindy West after a woman writer shared a story about a friend’s young daughter who was being sexually harassed at school but “had no adult in her life who’s even remotely versed in concepts like victim-blaming and slut-shaming and boundaries and consent.” She wanted some resources to give the girl that would drive home the message: I believe you. It’s not your fault. 

The site offers a space for young people to ask questions and ask for advice, but mostly its mission is to show that they’re not alone:

This blog isn’t about advice, exactly—though that’s certainly a part of it (ask us anything!)—as much as it is about solidarity.  If your step-dad tells you that “it’s your fault,” we’re here to stand in defiance of that, forever, without question. If your teacher says you “shouldn’t have made a scene,” we’re here to shout in one great big voice that you didn’t make that scene—your harasser did. If your family or your town or your school seems so small and small-minded that you think you might just fold up into nothing, we’re here to let you know that the world is much, much bigger.  If you have questions about anything, no matter how insignificant, we’re here, and there are so many of us.

West, who is fielding submissions, says there are some common themes in the narratives so far. “So many people are put through the dual trauma of being victimized and then being blamed/doubted/scolded for speaking up about your victimization.” But hopefully by sharing our stories we can “maybe break some cycles before they begin.”

Have a story to share? You can submit it here.

Maya DusenberyMaya Dusenbery is an Executive Director of Feministing.

St. Paul, MN

Maya Dusenbery is executive director in charge of editorial at Feministing. She is the author of the forthcoming book Doing Harm: The Truth About How Bad Medicine and Lazy Science Leave Women Dismissed, Misdiagnosed, and Sick (HarperOne, March 2018). She has been a fellow at Mother Jones magazine and a columnist at Pacific Standard magazine. Her work has appeared in publications like Cosmopolitan.com, TheAtlantic.com, Bitch Magazine, as well as the anthology The Feminist Utopia Project. Before become a full-time journalist, she worked at the National Institute for Reproductive Health. A Minnesota native, she received her B.A. from Carleton College in 2008. After living in Brooklyn, Oakland, and Atlanta, she is currently based in the Twin Cities.

Maya Dusenbery is an executive director of Feministing and author of the forthcoming book Doing Harm on sexism in medicine.

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