“Mandatory Sex” – part of a healthy marriage!?

*Trigger warning*

“Mandatory Sex”.  Just roll the phrase around on your tongue, as you poor bewildered brain tries to process it.

If you’re anything like me, you scanned over the phrase only to immediately focus back on it, as your stomach turned, and the world seemed just a little bit yuckier. And, honestly, I really do try to limit my exposure to things that make me want to vomit, or scream, or punch people I have never met in the face. Again, not too Christmas-sy. So yes, I apologize – but I just couldn’t refrain from passing this along.

Ok, There – Now that the apologies are out of the way, we can proceed.

Remember CBS? You know, the supposedly legitimate news and entertainment broadcasting network? Something that supposedly represents this century?

Well, today, I happened upon the grossest article on the website for CBS “News”…entitled…wait for it… “Should sex be mandatory in marriage?”

Yes – I am serious!  No - really, I am! I’ve attached the link below, but maybe you should wait to follow up that one on an empty stomach.

Maaanndaaatory Sex”. Now there’s an idea that embodies love, I’m sure. There’s not much hotter or more empowering than the notion of “mandatory sex”, I’m sure.

If you haven’t gotten sick all over your keyboard yet (again, I apologize) – you can watch the accompanying video. Apparently the people at CBS were resourceful to get in a panelist to support the idea. And the icing on the cake – he is actually an authority on the matter in that he has written a book called “He Said..She said” or some shit like that….doubtlessly chock full of excellent advice for its presumably female target market.

Yes, ladies, – WE are the target market for this kind of crap….because it is US that second guess ourselves so much more often, and spend more time wondering how we can better please our partners. (At our own expense if need be.)

Say what you want about men….but they would never buy that crap. And neither should we. But many of us do, and consequently there’s a market for books like his….and lots of people who are receptive to brilliant ideas like “mandatory sex” in the context of marriage. (The very notion of thinking its perfectly legitimate to demand sex from an unwilling partner that you love….that probably loves you….ugh, my poor stomach…there I go again).

I also noticed that this article was 1.5 yrs old now….where the HELL was the outcry then? I noticed they were smart enough to introduce the concept of sexual slavery by referencing the case of the woman who supposedly sued her husband….for all of 14 thousand dollars….for failing to have sex with her.

Hey! By golly, I’ve got an idea too!! f we’re gonna go that route…how about making it mandatory that men perform due diligence that sex is mutually enjoyable?! Meaning that a lot of guys are gonna have to get beyond the selfish idea that them receiving oral sex or just diving into action with their most prized member alone (with zero foreplay) is allllll a woman could ever want.

If we could sue for that one, ladies, more of us would be much richer.

One last thing – the poll. A WHOPPING 60% PERCENT of respondents AGREED that “YES! Sex SHOULD be mandatory in marriage!”.

See….I told you to wait until you had an empty stomach.

Hey, let’s call this one what it really is: “MANDATORY SEX” isn’t really any different than “COERCED SEX”…..which isn’t that different from, you know, “THAT RAPE THING”.

What do you want to do about this one? An online petition?  It moved me enough to make my first ever blog or online posting, lol! So I’d love to hear what you guys think.

Now that I’ve upchucked my cookies, I suppose its time to go back to indulging in the egg nog and try to think happier thoughts.

Happy Holidays.



Disclaimer: This post was written by a Feministing Community user and does not necessarily reflect the views of any Feministing columnist, editor, or executive director.

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