By Katie Halper • @kthalps • 11 years ago

Finally, SOMEONE has the guts to blame Sandy on the gays!

Thank God. I mean, literally, you can thank god for bringing on Hurricane Sandy. Of course god isn’t just some sadistic schmuck, wreaking havoc for the sake of it. He’s trying to wake us up to a danger that is infinitely greater than any natural disaster you could imagine: homosexuality. I can’t take credit for this insight into god’s motives. It comes from author and Chaplain John McTernan, who also moonlights as a meteorological analyst.

During Hurricane Isaac,  McTernan hypothesized, “It could be that God is putting an end to this city and its wickedness,” since “New Orleans is still hosting Southern Decadence with open homosexuality manifesting in the streets of the city.” And he warned “Let’s all watch this very closely, because if New Orleans is destroyed, it is a sure sign that the final judgment for the national sin of America has arrived.” New Orleans survived, so that wasn’t the final judgement.

But maybe Sandy is! Sandy is actually more complex. It’s god’s punishment for homosexuality AND the Madrid Peace Process, which divided Israel in 1991. Skeptical? Well, McTernan has the numbers to back it up.

Twenty-one years breaks down to 7 x 3, which is a significant number with God. Three is perfection as the Godhead is three in one while seven is perfection.

It appears that God gave America 21 years to repent of interfering with His prophetic plan for Israel; however, it has gotten worse under all the presidents and especially Obama. Obama is 100 percent behind the Muslim Brotherhood which has vowed to destroy Israel and take Jerusalem. Both candidates are pro-homosexual and are behind the homosexual agenda. America is under political judgment and the church does not know it!

So don’t blame climate change, which doesn’t exist anyway. Blame homosexuality and diplomacy.

nyc

Born and raised on the mean streets of New York City’s Upper West Side, Katie Halper is a comic, writer, blogger, satirist and filmmaker based in New York. Katie graduated from The Dalton School (where she teaches history) and Wesleyan University (where she learned that labels are for jars.) A director of Living Liberally and co-founder/performer in Laughing Liberally, Katie has performed at Town Hall, Symphony Space, The Culture Project, D.C. Comedy Festival, all five Netroots Nations, and The Nation Magazine Cruise, where she made Howard Dean laugh! and has appeared with Lizz Winstead, Markos Moulitsas, The Yes Men, Cynthia Nixon and Jim Hightower. Her writing and videos have appeared in The New York Times, Comedy Central, The Nation Magazine, Gawker, Nerve, Jezebel, the Huffington Post, Alternet and Katie has been featured in/on NY Magazine, LA Times, In These Times, Gawker,Jezebel, MSNBC, Air America, GritTV, the Alan Colmes Show, Sirius radio (which hung up on her once) and the National Review, which called Katie “cute and some what brainy.” Katie co-produced Tim Robbins’s film Embedded, (Venice Film Festival, Sundance Channel); Estela Bravo’s Free to Fly (Havana Film Festival, LA Latino Film Festival); was outreach director for The Take, Naomi Klein/Avi Lewis documentary about Argentine workers (Toronto & Venice Film Festivals, Film Forum); co-directed New Yorkers Remember the Spanish Civil War, a video for Museum of the City of NY exhibit, and wrote/directed viral satiric videos including Jews/ Women/ Gays for McCain.

Katie is a writer, comedian, filmmaker, and New Yorker.

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