What’s a Republican girl to do?

Picture of a young girl in pigtails with her hand on her forehead

Seriously, if I were a Republican woman looking at this current slate of candidates for the Republican presidential nomination I would be very unhappy.

First, there’s Mitt Romney, who is a chameleon. He’s like that guy you dated back in college who had the pearly white smile and who said all the right things. To you and all 11 of his other girlfriends. Mitt just can’t commit.

Next up we have Herman “999” Cain who just can’t go a single minute without a woman from his past coming out of the woodwork claiming harassment, assault, or an affair. Mr. Cain is of course denying everything except paying rent for his “friend” who he likes to chat with at 4:26 in the morning some days. Totally harmless when you’re married of course!

Next, we have Jon Huntsman. He’s not listed third here because he’s third in the polls, but instead because he had the potential to be the “smart” candidate on the Republican side until he called Herman Cain’s latest scandals “bimbo eruptions.” Gee, perhaps Mr. Huntsman would feel differently if his own daughters were called bimbos? Or maybe this is just Huntsman showing his true colors, because this is not his first sexist comment. In the past he’s claimed that the media only covers Michelle Bachmann because she’s pretty. Well, maybe Jon Huntsman only says sexist crap because he’s jealous that no one is paying him any attention when he’s not saying sexist things?

Next, is Newt! A man who somehow despite being a total moderate and on his third marriage in a party which cares about such things, is at the top of the heap this week. Seriously, a conservative woman should look at Newt’s history of going to his cancer stricken wife’s hospital bed to discuss divorce so he could marry wife number 2 as somewhat of a disqualifier in the categories of “character” and “values” but hey what do I know.

Let’s not forget Rick Perry and Michelle Bachmann who together have about three firing neurons between them. Or I guess in Perry’s case it’s only two firing neurons huh?

Then there is always Ron Paul, my personal favorite. Paul sometimes says things that sound very reasonable until about two and half minutes into a rant and after three times saying liberty you are left totally confused and concerned that if you are an uninsured woman with cervical cancer that Ron thinks you should just die. There’s liberty in death! Oh wait…no? Oh.

As an alternative to these charmers you could vote for Fred Karger.  The name of his recently released political memoir basically sums up his campaign for President–Fred Who? Karger is a gay Republican that Miriam had the privilege of interviewing last year. Pro-choice, feminist, in favor of the ERA…he might be the only person out there who actually considers him a Republican.

Considering Karger hasn’t been able to get into any debates, a Republican woman has to look at the rest of these options and wonder what is going on in the GOP.

*Note* Who is this Santorum person? Maybe you should google it.

Join the Conversation

  • http://feministing.com/members/toongrrl/ toongrrl

    Sadly I know some Republican women that aren’t bothered by any of that.

    • http://feministing.com/members/ashyclark/ Ashley Bell Clark

      Don’t worry, there are. :) Not that these republican/democrat labels matter anyways. ;)

  • http://feministing.com/members/lizz/ Liz

    You’re right toongrrl, it seems that republican women don’t think these offensive remarks coming from republican candidates apply to them. When republicans say sexist things, republican women assume they’re referring to “other” women, women who are very different from themselves. Until they find themselves the direct target of sexism they’ll never understand that a sexist president hurts everyone.

  • http://feministing.com/members/dearabigail/ Abigail

    Ha! The part about Ron Paul, it’s like you read my mind! Just add in that he reminds me of a senile male relative – loveable but crazy.

  • http://feministing.com/members/veronicacharl10/ Veronica

    Not to mention Ron Paul seems to think that the way to save the economy is to bring home all our soldiers….ALL of them. From EVERY COUNTRY IN THE WORLD. At the same time.
    Nevermind that we would have to house all these new veterans…and they’d need jobs. Oh, and there’s also that little thing with the treaties that were signed at the end of WWII that kind of…obligates us to be in some of those countries.
    Oh yeah, and that wouldn’t cost a dime would it Mr. Paul?


  • http://feministing.com/members/robbieloveslife/ Robert

    There are a lot of religious women that will vote for any republican because of their “faith”. I have met some African-American women that still support Herman Cain and criticize the women accusing him of harassment. There was a poll that listed Obama vs any republican and the republican had a higher vote. This might sound extreme but if the democrats want to win next year I think Obama should step aside and let Hillary Clinton run.