“I’m not a virgin, because virginity isn’t even real”

The title of Internet Crush of the Week for several Feministing crew members (no names, but they rhyme with Shmos and Shmoe) goes to this guy, who has taken a Madonna classic and turned it into pure gender theory geek gold, with a heavy dose of awesome, plus a sexy little wink at the beginning:

Lyrics – which are hilarious – below the jump.

I made it through the awfulness
Somehow I made it through
Didn’t know how fucked up it was
Until I fucked you

I was made to feel
Like sex could make
A piece of me go missing

But you made me think
Yeah you made me think
What can sex really do?

I’m not a virgin
Because virginity isn’t even real
Not a virgin
It’s just a heteropatriarchal construct
Designed to police how you feel

Gonna get all your consent, love
And give all mine too
There’s no reason to “save” our bodies
By denying what we want to do

We won’t lose
If we choose
That something new
I want to do with you

Our bodies are our own
Our bodies are our own
And that’s always true

I’m not a virgin
Virginity is pretty much arbitrary
Not a virgin
It gets used to justify violence
And that’s really scary

Yeah that’s really scary
Violence is the worst
Really, really bad

We won’t lose
If we choose
That something new
I want to do with you

It doesn’t need ending
And it doesn’t need defending
Virginity isn’t even a thing

We’re not virgins
There’s no virginity to steal
We’re not virgins
It creates a hierarchy of sex acts
Where only the top one is “real”

We’re not virgins
Oh, we’re not virgins
It feels so fine to say
Is such bullshit
Oh yeah, we’re not virgins
Oh oh oh, we’re not virgins

New York, NY

Chloe Angyal is a journalist and scholar of popular culture from Sydney, Australia.

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