The Culture of Catcalls

I’ve recently started riding my bike to work, which feels truly liberating.  But my rides are bringing me into contact with a group I’ve been trying to avoid for years: street catcallers.  My guess is that every woman has been verbally harassed like this at some point in her life, often on a regular basis.  As a resident of a large city, I’ve had my fair share of annoying, embarassing encounters.  And when I’m on my bike, the amount of comments, honks and jeers skyrockets.

On my ride to work today, I got an “Opa!” then a honk just a few blocks later.  I refuse to blame the spandex cycling leggings (what riders call “business attire”) because it doesn’t seem to matter what I wear.  I could go out in a giant, formless bag and still attract unwanted attention just by being a woman.

A year ago, I was walking to my car with my girlfriend.  We were in comfy clothes, sweatpants and t-shirts, going to get coffee.(So to all those victim-blamers out there, no, we weren’t dressed provocatively and therefore “asking for it.”)  A large group of teenage boys was walking down the street, and I got a bit apprehensive when I realized we would cross paths.  As if on cue, one of the boys looks at my girlfriend and says, “mmm very nice.”  I flipped, shouting, “Who the *&^% said that?!” at some 15 year old at least 4 inches shorter than me.  He shrugged and said, “Hey, it’s a compliment.”  I told him he should mind his own business and went off in a huff.  I’ve never been sexually assaulted, by my girlfriend who got catcalled has been.  It was a really tough experience for her.

That’s the first time I saw the clear line between “harmless” street catcalls and rape.  That kid’s explanation shocked me.  He assumed because we were women that his attention was desired.  He made it sound downright benevolent to verbally harass someone.  His actions were undesired, demeaning and undoubtedly sexual in nature.  What else does that describe?

I think that kind of mindset contributes greatly to our country’s rape culture, specifically acquaintance rape.  If you think of your own sexual attentions and desires as a “compliment,” what can a woman’s “no” mean to you?

I’m going to practice a line or two that I can use in response the next time I’m catcalled.  I don’t want another man to think that his verbal harassment is desired or acceptable.  I’m still working on the verbal response.  On a bike, though, the finger works just fine.