Getting Past The Media Bias to a Real Conversation about Abortion

For those of us who frequently visit this site, it’s a pretty safe assumption that most of us here are pro-choice. We may have varying personal feelings, but as Feministing is a site for feminists to get together and discuss issues, and even disagree on a lot of things, there are some feminist values many feminists will not compromise on, like abortion. It’s a good thing, in my opinion, to stick to these feminist values. But with all the talk of mama grizzlies and co-opting feminism, I’ve been thinking about how important it is to try to have a real, honest conversation about abortion to those who are anti-choice.

I definitely don’t think Sarah Palin and the mama grizzlies are feminists. But what about a person who thinks abortion is wrong, but otherwise supports women’s liberation? I’ve heard a lot of different opinions on this, I for one think you can be a feminist and be against abortion personally. I don’t think it automatically means you think women have to have babies, nor does it mean you are against it legally. But what if you are against it legally, but support comprehensive sex ed and access to contraceptives, while realizing life-saving abortions should never be denied? Again, I don’t think that makes you automatically sexist, but this is a conflict with feminism. But the biggest thing for me is something that is too often ignored. Ignorance is a big part of these types of opinions, as well as misinformation.

Ignorance and misinformation are perpetuated by the conservative right, while there’s much less information and discussion from the left and feminists. I feel the republicans are very loud with their lies about a fetus being the same as a newborn child, that it’s murder to have an abortion, calling many women who have abortions and their doctors “baby-killers”. The democrats frequently relent on their supposed pro-choice positions, I guess out of fear of those loud, powerful lies the republicans spew. While many feminists will be willing to talk about the lies, sometimes it’s only with fellow feminists and not those who oppose abortion, sometimes automatically writing those people off as sexist.

I feel this is too important of an issue to not talk about with anti-choice people we meet. I believe more people would be pro-choice if they had more information. I think it’s all too easy to forget how relentlessly the anti-choice message is laid onto people outside of feminist communities. The anti-choice message paints in black and white, you’re either on their side, pro-life, or the bad side, supporting the murder of children. It can be hard to move past that to the truth, but discussion is crucial to that movement.

When I did my thinking and considering on where I fell on the sides of the abortion argument, I remember thinking  ‘I hate abortion, it’s so sad, I don’t want it to happen’. Then I thought ‘ yeah, but does a woman deserve jail for getting an abortion?’  I kind of surprised myself because even though this was a basic question to ask myself when forming my opinion, I had never heard this type of question in the arguments before on television or anything. There was little or no discussion of the actual women it directly affected, and the challenges and harsh realities they had to face with an unplanned pregnancy. That’s when I knew, ‘no, she shouldn’t go to jail’.

After all of the consideration and information I attempted to have to make the decision I now know to be right (to be pro-choice), I see how hard it was to get past all of the rhetoric. I’ll try to speak up more about it to anti-choice people I know, and I hope you will too.