The *Religious* Slut

Dear Feministing and Feminists alike,

I have a complaint. I often have complaints, but starting this year of High School, and having many of my girl friends leave to post-secondary college, I am left alone with all of my ‘boyfriends’ and some new make-shift acquaintances, people to at least speak to in class. And I could go on for a few hours about my observations, likes, dislikes, and the gossip but not today!

One of these guys, who is not exactly a great friend for me but is an acquaintance and someone I speak with daily, is a devout born again Christian Republican. He loves God and Guns…One day, he sent me a text message saying; “I am silent today. It is Pro-Life day. I lost a brother to abortion.”  Well, needless to say as the slutty gal I am, as the Green-Libertarian loving Democrat I am, and as the woman trusting feminist I am, I was appalled (and that was known to him very shortly after).  We proceeded to speak (well I spoke, he wrote messages) about his ‘lost brother’ and about how or how not abortion is murder. Let’s put it this way, when I asked if the baby being saved by this campaign was a gay-Muslim, would he still support it with all his heart-he pretended as if he was actually doing class work for once.

A few days later, me and this particular boy, got into a debate about Katy Perry, recently in the news for her breast-bearing outfits and sesame street. I promise, my point is coming up soon. The conversation, for clerical purposes, started out like this: “Do you still think Katy Perry is a Christian (and later, it came to light that he was complaining about her on sesame street), he asked me with a smug look on his face. Again, appalled, I replied, ‘What the hell do clothes have to do with religion? I mean, she never wore Nazi paraphernalia.” And in more words, we continued to argue about the religious dress code and all those damn moral standards, any good girl should strive for. As hesitant as I am to support her due to some endeavors, I found myself clutching onto the belief that religion is not about a dress code. (Though when I ‘googled’ “where does the bible say how you can dress”, I was promptly hit with a myriad of responses about exactly what the Bible says you (a woman) can and cannot wear. Rush was not available for comment.)

I continued on through four hours of class, until American History (that’s ‘advanced placement’ US history, if you want to be real pretentious about it), where I am decent friends with a Facebook professed, conservative Jew, who is part of the democratic party. So I asked him, “Hey (name) I was wondering if I could ask you a religious question.” He very nervously answered yes, so I proceeded in my nicest little girl voice to ask, if point blank, ‘slutty girls could be religious’ (in his own ‘Jewish’ opinion). I was expecting an amicable response, and an affirmation that I was right. My thesis here being, religion is not about the way one dresses, it is a more of a spiritual code in which one can ideally find support and guidance or something like. Instead, he looked right down at me (I’m 5 feet tall, it’s not that hard), and told me I could not be religious because the way I dress is offensive and it’s morally incorrect, I was far too blinded by sadness to start arguing like a psycho at that minute. So rather embarrassed, I returned to my seat (right next to his) and flabbergasted, I thought more about it. We talked about the Rally To Restore Sanity/And/Or/Fear then, and how stoked we both were to hear about Obama on the Daily Show.

I got home and realized one thing; I’m mad as hell.

I’m mad as hell because guess what, whoever the fuck decided that in modern day society a religious  protocol falls under the dress code category-is sorely mistaken.  Is that what organized religion is? A dictatorship of ‘moral standards’, I suppose so. Because, the Lord and Savior could never save a woman exposing her legs and never one with such deviously sexual behavior, such as myself, at least according to this particular Christian I spoke to. To make this clear, this entire argument is based on clothing not sexual practices (trust me, neither of them are in the know on my sex life).

I understand the premise, and I’m not even going into Islamic territory, though I could ask a Muslim female friend someday in English…I suppose I’m just afraid of the response. Am I going to hell because I wear high waisted bandage skirts? Pleather pants (never kill an animal for fashion), 6 inch heels, and American Apparel tank tops? Am I unable to be a religious girl, who prays, because I don’t own any shorts that go more than half way down my thighs, or because I thoroughly have chosen my closet with the words ‘slutty rockstar chic’ in mind (okay, I don’t do that…all the time).

Gosh that’s too bad I’m a devout…Atheist, I guess. Because I am a hard-pressed atheist, who could probably never ever tone that down, nor control the impulse to argue on sight…I feel my views are biased. Can I truly not understand the religious ways? Is it modern day sexualization of girls, specifically American girls with Hollywood standards? Is it ‘Slut culture’? What the fuck is this? Ah, Feministing Ladies, what do you say? What is this atrocity that is slut culture, religious culture, and what is with that Muslim Obama? I mean really…Impeach him already. It’s too simple to be this obvious…Why do people think this? And why would they admit that to a girl who is obviously not shy about it; What do they think of me, and why, why do they think this?

Personal Rant; My boobs never caused any emotional distress on anyone, male or female…In fact I’m giving them names, and tattooing those names on my boobs, I’m naming the right one Vindication and the left one Serenity, that way when you get down to the initials it’s VS-Victoria’s Secret. Because I aspire to be a Victoria’s Secret model, like Doutzen Kroes.