The Girl Scouts are selling you lesbian, baby-killing feminist militia cookies

Seriously, just look at that logo. SO gay.

We’re a wee late getting to this, but it’s just too good not to mention. And no, this is not an Onion headline.

When the Girl Scouts aren’t helping young girls become confident and productive members of society, they’re apparently serving as a feminist training ground for godless, man-hating, pro-abortion lesbianism — at least according to Hans Zeiger, Republican candidate for Washington’s House of Representatives.

That’s right, this GOP candidate thinks that the nearly century-old organization has been brainwashing your children by feeding them lesbian abortion cookies, according to a statement that was found from earlier this decade:

I knew those Thin Mints tasted ungodly! While Zeiger has tried to cover his tracks by having the statement removed (along with a number of other problematic remarks found), the media beat him to the punch. So what was his response? That he removed them because the statements don’t represent his values anymore, adding that they would be a “distraction” from the campaign. Yeah, no shit — well, at least a distraction from the campaign he’s trying to put forth. Because I’d consider this pretty eye-opening information regarding the campaign, not a distraction, if you ask me.

Via.