Encouraging Adventure

When a woman or girl talks about "dangerous" men, be it a realistic band member or biker, or the fictional vampire boyfriend, it’s often because they want something exciting to happen. I don’t think there’s anything problematic with desiring this type of man in itself, but I do think that the underlying problem is that this implies women can’t have their own excitement.

The implication seems to be that women are boring, that we lead droll little lives that can only be brightened up by an exciting action man, who will lead us off on adventures. No, we can’t have adventures, but we can tag along for the wonderful new world he’s going to show us. And then have his babies and make him dinner after.

I think that the goal shouldn’t be to eliminate this type of manliness, but to change "wouldn’t it be cool to date a magical guy?" to "wouldn’t it be cool to be magical?" To change "I’d like to date a guy in a band" to "I’d like to start a band."

Women and girls aren’t encouraged enough to draw on themselves for fulfillment and adventure, and it’s high time that changed. Ladies, live your dreams.