Wedding boudoir pictures – yikes

My good friend is getting married next month, and she’s had “boudoir pictures” taken. This is a wedding trend I’ve just become aware of, where women get glamorous pictures taken in lingerie for a wedding gift to their future husbands. My friend has spent the last year on Weight Watchers and becoming active at the gym, and she’s slowly dropped from a size 12 to a size 6. She’s thrilled with the change she’s made in herself and I know that the boudoir pictures are important to her now that she’s feeling comfortable in her skin.
Aside from all the squicky feelings the idea behind these boudoir pictures are giving me, and aside from the fact I’ve thought she was beautiful even before losing weight, I’m concerned by the preview pictures she sent me this week. Some of the poses have her ribs sticking out, and one of them even cuts off her head and only displays her breasts and butt. I went to the photographer’s website and was horrified to discover that out of the 30 example pictures, that almost none of them displayed the woman straight on so that she’s recognizable, almost all of them are emphasizing the body without the head. This might be to protect these women’s identity, but even my male friend who looked at them wondered why women would give such impersonal body shots to their husbands.
My friend has asked me to help her choose from the 50 pictures she receives the ones she will place in an album to give to her husband. How do I help her decide? I don’t want to suggest to her that ribs showing is sexy. I’ve already told her that out of the preview pictures, I prefer the ones with her head than the one without, but I don’t know what I’m going to do if the entire collection is filled with beheaded bodies. What would someone else do in my situation?

Disclaimer: This post was written by a Feministing Community user and does not necessarily reflect the views of any Feministing columnist, editor, or executive director.

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