Who needs credit cards when you have a junior vagina?

whoneeds.jpg
Reader Scarlett saw these oh-so-charming panties in the junior department of her local Wal-Mart on Kildare Farms Road in Cary, NC. There’s nothing quite like telling adolescent girls that they don’t need to worry about finances since they have their very own moneypot between their legs.
Contact customer service here and corporate offices here: let them know that preteen vaginas aren’t commodities.

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133 Comments

  1. JustBreathe
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:00 pm | Permalink

    I also have to agree with OTBuckeye and I’m glad that there is someone else out there who feels the same way. First of all, it was in the juniors section and in case you forgot how it felt to be in the junior section, you would probably have thought those same horrid undies were pretty cute and last time I checked it was the junior section not the kiddies section. There is a huge difference. Second of all, I think we’re getting worked up over something that is so inconsequential. There are much bigger issues to be dealing with than what undies Wal*Mart is selling. Chances are that if you went through most of the undies you’d find some even worse than these. How do you get from that message that juniors vaginas are commodities. It’s a definite hop, skip and big jump. No offense, but I’m not that old and I think they are kind of cute. Who is really going to see them anyways? I guess the saying is true that people will find literally anything to complain about.

  2. Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:01 pm | Permalink

    Some stuff, just ain’t funny, at all…

    From the “What the Hell were they thinking, when they designed this?” Department:
    FOXNews.com – Wal-Mart Yanks Pink ‘Credit Card’ Panties Off Shelves – Local News | News Articles | National News | US News
    The panties, which wer…

  3. Jessica
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:17 pm | Permalink

    Yeah, I love that when Fox News carries a story on this all the trolls come calling. This isn’t an all-panty-all-the-time site, folks so calm the hell down.
    On the logo…It’s ironic! That’s why she’s giving the finger: it’s a fuck you to the traditional beauty standards/sexism she represents. For more, ,a href=”http://feministing.com/archives/008080.html”click here.

  4. OTBuckeye
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:19 pm | Permalink

    “In case you didn’t notice somehow, we get in uproars about lots of things, as this blog has published hundreds (thousands?) of articles about everything from underwear to FGM to rape to advertising to grafitti to Disney movies. This isn’t the only post ever written on feministing! All you have to do is erase the /archives/008226.html in your address bar and hit enter. Read the last 20 articles, then reevaluate your statement. kthnx.”
    This is true… and I appreciate the ‘WebBrowser 101′, but I’ve got it covered… funny thing is, if I took out the word ‘panties’ and did an ‘insert word here’ for several other topics covered, the end argument would be the same. What do I know, though, I’m just some ignoramus who is too intellectually inferior to be able to discern the subliminal message on a pair of Xmas pantyloons. I’m not bashing everything on this site- I’m not that narrow minded- but this entire argument and uproar is a joke. And I stand by my original statement- if you cant find anything else to complain about, then either you arent well versed in what’s going on in the outside world, or you just have a hatred for undergarments and are an advocate of going commando. Have a great day.

  5. people_RELAX
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:25 pm | Permalink

    Wow, funny how everyone goes up in arms about a piece of clothing that is meant to be worn UNDER another piece of clothing. I have 3 daughters, the only time their underwear would be seen by anyone else, is when their laundry it being done by me or my wife. There is no reason to think that a corporation, who I’m sure had to go through a ton of censor approvals, would purposely sell something suggestive. One person thought it was wrong, said something to the press, and now EVERYONE thinks its wrong. Where is the photo of the backside? No one will see it. That would make the media obsolete in having a story. Silly media, twisting and taking everything out of context. Its a piece of cotton with ink on it, not a sign saying “Come get a piece”! I guess its just a feminist thing. Im not saying that I turn women into objects, they’re not. But it you wouldn’t see a teenager upset about the panties, you wouldn’t see a woman in her late teens to mid 30′s complaining. Its just the “Older-Fashioned” (not old) ladies who take offense (and if there are younger taking offense, its because they take make up their own minds). Humor in this world is changing. The world is not going to well for some, so a pot-shot at humor here and there helps us get through. Laugh it up, relax, and ENJOY the life you are living. Don’t spend every moment complaining or trying to find something to cause an up-roar about. Thank you.

  6. SuperDad
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:40 pm | Permalink

    As disgusting as this is, we shouldn’t be shocked. I found this forum while reading the news on Foxnews.com. There are five stories in the news today that are offensive to those who love and respect womankind. An 11 and 14 yr old try to sexually assault a 60-year old woman, a Muslim dad kills his daughter because she won’t wear her head wrap, six NJ troopers accused of sexually assaulting a woman, Wal-Mart and their hooker drawers and Paris Hilton wearing nothing but gold paint for a champagne ad. The latter is her choice and if I thought it had a damn thing to do with empowerment, I’d be all for it. As a father of two young women, I’ve been dealing with this sort of ignorance for nearly 20 years. The more I see, the madder I get. I’m sorry there aren’t more dads that care enough to speak to their precious daughters about this kind of thing.

  7. Betty Boondoggle
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 3:45 pm | Permalink

    You what’s *really* funny – when the same person posts under multiple screen names to make it look like there’s a lot of people who agree with them.
    or that multiple dishits who know fuck-all about feminism think they get to decide what feminists can talk about.
    But what’s not funny is these same dipshits think this shit is okay for children. Grow up and stop being trolls.
    Thanks!

  8. Blitzgal
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 4:02 pm | Permalink

    My local legislators have spent the past several weeks drafting a bill that would change the name of our capitol building’s holiday tree to a Christmas tree after some trumped up Bill O’Reilly-esque charges of anti-Christian sentiment. I’m far more upset about my tax dollars being wasted on that kind of bullshit than an open discussion on a blog, OTBuckeye. ‘kthanx.

  9. Posted December 12, 2007 at 4:12 pm | Permalink

    Here’s a very funny (and sad) editorial on the same subject:
    http://www.nysun.com/article/66915
    by the author of, I kid you not, “Stop Dressing Your Six-year-old Like a Skank.”

  10. Kimmy
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 4:31 pm | Permalink

    But it you wouldn’t see a teenager upset about the panties, you wouldn’t see a woman in her late teens to mid 30′s complaining. Its just the “Older-Fashioned” (not old) ladies who take offense (and if there are younger taking offense, its because they take make up their own minds).

    *sing-song* Somebody doesn’t know what site they’re on… hee hee hee hee hee hee hee

  11. Pythia
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 4:48 pm | Permalink

    OTBuckeye, JustBreathe, etc: You’re not seeing the big picture when you say this is “just� underwear and what’s the big deal? Yes, girls’ underwear is a small facet of the world, but these underwear are a single example of an overarching set of ideas about girls & women and sexuality. Sexism isn’t produced by someone sitting the world’s population down and screaming into a bullhorn explicitly: “Girls should aspire to be sexy rather than striving to realize their potential as human beings!� Instead, that message is communicated in a thousand tiny tiny tiny ways every day—from how commercials depict girls & women, to what parents and friends say about the sexes, to jokes, to off-hand comments conveying expectations for achievement, to, yes, the clothing we wear. These underwear are part of a broader message to girls about how they should regard themselves and their sexuality: available for a price, and themselves a commodity.
    About the argument that these underwear are not significant because no one is going to see them, being worn under clothing… There needs only be one person who sees these them for them to have an impact—the fifteen to eighteen year old girl who will wear them and internalize their message. No one else needs to see the underwear for them to shape the worldview and self-concept of that one girl.

  12. SarahMC
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 4:52 pm | Permalink

    I would have thought the Fox News viewers/readers would have found these panties nasty. Sexualizing little girls and all.
    But I guess since the evil feminists got outraged over them, the wingnuts feel they have to take the opposing view.

  13. ShelbyWoo
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 5:26 pm | Permalink

    I would have thought the Fox News viewers/readers would have found these panties nasty. Sexualizing little girls and all. But I guess since the evil feminists got outraged over them, the wingnuts feel they have to take the opposing view.
    WORD.
    (who did I steal that from…dinogirl, maybe…whoever I stole it from, I diggin’ it)

  14. hopeisawakingdream
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 5:54 pm | Permalink

    The critiques of this “just being about underwear” make me think of the essay “Oppression” by Marilyn Frye (a feminist must-read by the way). It isn’t that long…so go google it. Yeah, it is just underwear, but it is representative of a much bigger issue.

  15. Posted December 12, 2007 at 6:06 pm | Permalink

    Kmari1222, I think that MIGHT be the point, but it’s not very clear to me. And I personally wouldn’t feel the need to have a superhero woman type icon represent me while I assume my power in society as an intelligent, attractive woman. I think it’s time for that logo to evolve into something more representative of the state of womankind today. Of else go more extreme, like have the silhouette of a woman in a burka giving society the finger?
    Do you see what I mean? I think it’s perfectly possible to represent the beauty of a woman with power without resorting to comic book male fantasy images of women. That’s not how I see myself when I feel powerful and independent and well in my skin as a woman. A stripper-like image is not my idea of what a sexy, sexual woman is — it’s a man’s idea. And while there are men reading this website (as evidenced by our wise wife-manager Mr. “A Male” above), this is a website for women, not for men who we want to “give the finger” to.
    I’d love to hear what the people at feministing thinks of this point, too.

  16. Jessica
    Posted December 12, 2007 at 7:12 pm | Permalink

    newyorkette, i’m not going to get in a debate about the logo–we love it and think it’s perfect. thanks!

  17. Posted December 12, 2007 at 11:59 pm | Permalink

    Newyorkette, this is a website for feminists. And we don’t want to give the finger to men. We are flipping off the patriarchy and those who perpetuate it.

  18. SuperDad
    Posted December 13, 2007 at 12:21 am | Permalink

    I kinda like the logo too. Yeah she’s flippin’ a bird, but it is for all the right reasons…

  19. A male
    Posted December 13, 2007 at 6:36 am | Permalink

    “our wise wife-manager Mr. ‘A Male’”
    I wonder if anyone here would really care to take the time to learn about the differences between Japanese and US society *in general*, for me to actually believe my university educated Japanese wife and native English speaking children need “instruction,” when it comes to personal safety among other things. Don’t take my word for it, or any links that I give you. No. You are mature, intelligent critical thinkers. I shall allow you confirm it for yourselves if you really care to be open minded. Anyone else can make their way through this if they wish:
    First I will tell you this. Some are offended by Americans or feminists “telling” British Indians or anyone else how to think or live. Japan is one country that needs guidance, from outside if necessary. There are Japanese women’s activists, but their influence is limited, and there is not much popular support for “women’s” rights at all. One news story I read while in Japan in the mid 1990s really stuck with me, for the situation has not changed much. One touring American activist gave a speech at a gathering of Japanese advocates and other listeners. The American activist asked why, I forget the particulars, the Japanese movement was the way it was. The Japanese side responded with, [I forget name]-san, why don’t you lead us? In another news item, the nightly TV news, some women’s rights activists in Tokyo [largest, most modern Japanese city, mm?] held a one day sit-in for women, to make society understand the influence of women. Reporters asked random female passers-by for their reaction. Without exception, the women on camera not only claimed to be unaware of the event, they had no interest in it. Why? Why not demonstrate to a male dominated society, the influence women have? “Because I have to go home and cook for my husband.” [handpalm] Does anyone else see the irony here? These husbands cannot be expected to fend for themselves for even one single meal. Even if they can’t cook due to lack of experience, have they not heard of restaurants? How about that, Missus? God, reading about the Japanese women’s movement was so interesting. Ironically, they probably were most powerful and influential in the decade immediately after WWII, when allowed new freedoms, some Japanese women immediately rose to power as politicians (allegedly Christian), and through their influence, outlawed prostitution and pornography. [In theory, at least.]
    While we are on the topic of “the finger,” in Japan “the finger” is considered to be a joke, which has lost the meaning it first had when it was introduced from the outside. The same for “fuck you.” It is considered a joke. When I lived there, you could find both on television programs and in comics meant for children. Just one real world example: a bunch of Japanese teenaged boys, my new year public school students, came up to me with smiles on their cute 7-8th grade faces, and in what I assumed was meant to be a friendly gesture to break the ice, a number put up their fingers in front of my face, and said with same smile: “Fuck you? Fuck you? Fuck you?” while they all laughed.
    I did not join in, but was able to see the humor in this, because I knew they didn’t understand. They were in a safe environment. Their country, their school, their turf. Now what would happen if they paid five dollars as many did, and went up to spend their Saturday or Sunday afternoon hanging out in the big city of Hiroshima, where there were thousands of foreigners such as groups of local US Marines on leave, and tried the same friendly approach? I do not mean to denigrate US Marines when I say those little boys would probably get their asses stomped by a gang of Marines. It would be a simple, yet costly misunderstanding for all parties involved. Worse has truly happened.
    It is a very, very, very common practice for Japanese young people, say from older elementary up to college age, to call out to, or approach random foreign looking people to “practice their English.” It does not matter if the strangers are Brazilian or Russian, either. A lot of what these people actually try is what they see in media, made popular by Japanese comedians, popular music, or Hollywood movies. I am sorry, but even a group of liberated, independent young women should not approach a random man or GROUP of foreign men, say US Marines, on the street and say “I love you,” (happened to me, but those were just more of my students) without at least understanding what might happen. No, I am not blaming women. The same goes for Japanese men who want to try an authentic rap/hip hop “motherfucker” with a real, live, omg, black American when he is least expecting it, just walking hand in hand with his girlfriend in the shopping arcade; much less from a Japanese total stranger with a smile on his face with his smiling friends. None of these are hypothetical situations. Things like this can and do happen to my foreign colleagues or to random foreigners, at any time.
    Ah, my family: one day this year, both my children for some reason, came home and were giggling their asses off flipping the bird around the living room. Someone at school probably thought it was funny to teach the little Japanese kids this important aspect of American culture, or maybe it was just their time as kids. In any case, I happened to be on the sofa, and I tried to impress upon their first and second grade minds what the outcome of using that hand gesture could be at school, or particularly among strangers. I told my son, he would probably get into a fight (please note my daughter often makes her two years older brother cry for his “Mooooooommy,” by simply not sharing toys, or suddenly helping herself to whatever he is playing with at the time – yes, my son and daughter have their own toys “male” and “female,” but play together with exactly the same toys like Legos, stuffed animals and dolls, marbles, a basketball or football, my daughter’s pink bicycle . . . A “real” fight with an offended boy will go unfavorably). For my daughter . . . I guess giving someone the finger would just be plain rude, but it shouldn’t be done.
    It just so happened they stopped doing it, but I still feel they do not understand why it would be unwise to indiscriminately and randomly give people the finger. I shall wait and see, and if I can be there, I will need to try to explain our position to the offended parties. Oh, I almost forgot her – I will need to do it, because my wife does not understand the significance, either. For someone of mine and my wife’s generation in Japan, “the finger” appears to be an alien concept. It seems to lack any American meaning at all. My wife does not consider it funny. My wife does not consider it offensive. As a matter of fact, in Japanese sign language, or in common usage, a raised middle finger means elder brother! [By the same token a raised thumb means father . . . ] I tried to explain the significance of “the finger” to her at the same time as with the kids. She then proceeded to translate what I said into Japanese for some reason – my children are native speakers of English – but I do not believe she absorbed it either.
    Relevant aside: In nursing, we were taught that on average, six repetitions are required for teaching to stick. This is not the best example, but:
    Me [showing drug label]: “Mr. Jones, you need to take this antibiotic ‘one tablet, three times a day, *around the clock* until empty.’”
    Jones: “Yeah.”
    Me: “Can you repeat it for me?”
    Jones: [repeats verbatim]
    Me: “Do you understand?”
    Jones: “Yes.”
    Me: “Mr. Jones, can you tell me when you will take your medicine?”
    Jones: “When I wake up in the morning, at lunch time, and before I go to bed.”
    Me: “When will you stop?”
    Jones: “After I feel better.”
    No, the dramatized but realistic Mr. Jones, despite being a college graduate, an engineer, a factory foreman, a successful husband and father of four, does not get it. Which coincidentally, is how my mother and wife used to believe “three times a day” medicine were taken. No, that “around the clock” makes more plain than anything else, that each dose of the medicine is meant to be taken as close to eight hours apart as possible, even if it means waking you up in the middle of the night. Doctors who don’t mind disregarding sleep time because sleep is more important for recovery of say, a cold, will tell you so.
    So in addition to adjusting my language into separate phrases or in lay people’s terms, please imagine the entire above conversation five more times throughout the period of hospitalization. I consider this concept of a round of antibiotics to be considerably more simple than the significance of “the finger.”
    Again, I do not believe my patients are stupid, just because they do not understand their own language. This is clinic speak.
    I am not actually going to talk to my wife and children the average six times about “fuck you” or giving people the finger. Oh, yes, by the way, one day more recently as I sat at my computer, I could swear I heard I think it was my seven year old daughter, suddenly say “fuck” from right behind me. I must admit, I was caught by surprise. I whipped my head around and deadpanned “What?” “Nooothing,” said my daughter tilting her head with one of her goofy smiles.
    [I also need to further "instruct" both my children that they should not smile or laugh during a serious conversation such as being scolded. Never mind me - their schoolmates, teachers, or other elders and authority figures might get understandably pissed if it appeared my children were mocking them or not listening seriously and have unfavorable consequences.]
    Does anyone here not see a problem with that? Not a girl saying fuck. A seven year old possibly slipping and saying fuck in polite company or among strangers like at her girl scout meetings, in a restaurant, or at a PTA meeting; without really understanding what it meant, or what effect it could have on people.
    I cannot with reliability prevent my children from swearing. I see them less than six hours a day even when there are no meetings or lessons. Even fewer if I have weekend, holiday or shiftwork. The only thing I can be sure of, is I try to explain that “that word,” I am not going to repeat or reenforce it, is a “bad” word, and “maybe someone will fight you,” or something like that.
    I choose not to swear, and this post of mine is really out of character. Anyone who knows me in real life would not recognize my hand in this post. If my children want to emulate their peers or movies and talk that way among friends when they hit junior high or high school – including as how my friends and I used to do in 7th grade, break open and read “Totally Tasteless Jokes” aloud in its entirety to each other – I’ll try to be open minded. But they are not going to use that language against me or in Grandma’s house. Grandma grew up with the soap or paddle treatment 60 years ago, I got the leather belt until 33 years ago, and she’d have my ass today for simply allowing my children to say it.
    I do believe a good deal of the offense I sense here is due to the fact that I am a male, and that my partner in need of “instruction” is a female. But believe you me, any one of you would likely have a great deal to “instruct” your Japanese man about, if you were in such a relationship. For example, about Japanese vs. US dating or sexual customs. Or how a husband and wife conduct themselves as partners within the household, better yet if you both lived in *Japan*. Would you want your Japanese man to cook, clean, do laundry, or take care of the children? Do you want to continue your career, whether or not you actually have children? If the Japanese man is older than his mid 30′s you may have an ordeal on your hands, no matter how much you love each other.
    My wife and I are 39. She grew up without a mother. She was raised by older relatives, I mean near elderly or actually elderly. She is an unusual woman. Part of her charm. But for someone so young, she’s got some odd ideas about married relationships. For example, the traditional Japanese idea that the man makes the money. The man gives all the money to the wife. The wife manages the household finances herself. The wife gives the husband an allowance, in my case in Japan, about $200 a month. Anything else left over gets saved for the future. I got to feel “manly” as the breadwinner or the husband of a traditional wife (even though the wife may have her own job and money), but the flip side of the man being responsible for “outside” the house, inside the house is supposed to be the woman’s domain.
    For example, when I questioned my wife about her choice of home appliances when we moved in together as a married couple (Japanese woman responsible for setting up the house including furnishing it, prior to living together), she suddenly got a serious look on her face and told me, “the man is not supposed to talk [about] in the house.*”
    Oh, sorry honey, it’s just that, as part of Japanese wedding custom, which you demanded of me, and I caved to, I gave you $10,000 cash, about an entire year of my life savings, in a ceremonial Japanese “engagement” envelope, witnessed by your family and my mother who flew in from the US just for this, and would like to know where the fuck all “our” money suddenly went without my input . . . What do you mean this green plastic 130 liter refrigerator fucking cost $3,000, and this microwave was $700? No, of course I did not say that, but that is what I felt. Let us not speak of the $20,000 wedding she demanded, and got.
    *The woman’s authority within the confines of the house or family extends to how the children are raised, and for better or for worse, becoming quite similar to the husband’s new mother figure. I do not have much choice in these matters. Technically, I shouldn’t be the one “instructing” our children to watch their language or behavior at all. There is just the little problem of my wife not understanding what “the finger” or “fuck” means in OR out of American society. So you know who needs to take responsibility, to keep my children out of “little” misunderstandings.
    By the way, my university educated wife who has done some incredible things to survive the hardship of her younger years, again, part of what I fell in love with, is not “stupid.” These matters are simply alien or unfamiliar to her. I’ve had over 30 years of experience with “the finger” and “fuck” in common American usage. She has had a few minutes of “instruction,” and has no desire to learn more on her own through readily available dictionaries or online resources in her own language. Just another reason for you know who to take responsibility.
    I have 13 years of stories like this, and this was a mere portion of what I consider to be the amusing stuff, some lighthearted cultural differences. There is also the very serious personal stuff that can drive me to the psychiatrist.
    [My wife of course, denies there is anything "wrong" with her or any need for her to seek "help" - based on what she has told me about her life history which I believe and will keep private, my doctor most certainly disagrees, and immediately offered referrals, including for a Japanese doctor in another city, to avoid a conflict of interest (he said, she said, for $180 per hour every two weeks times two. Ka-ching.). I told my wife not to worry about money for the therapy or for the airline tickets to get to that doctor. No dice. There is about a 5% chance of changing my wife's mind, ladies, and it would probably involve having a nasty argument. And in any case, she is never wrong, or so I would believe.]. My wife and children have their own stories about me, and consider any problems to lie within me, because I worry about “so not important” things (like table manners or looking both ways before stepping out into the street. Yes, I am well aware my children are seven and nine, and they don’t get it yet). Never mind it is they who are strangers to this community and US culture. I believe I did my part to be the “Japanese” father/husband in Japan, despite disagreeing with it. I chose to conform because it is what she expected, and what she demanded.]
    I am complaining about my wife a lot. I am open for discussion in this forum or any other. I would like to point out that I know my wife is not a bad person, and I am also very demanding (She needs to do her part to have the children respect her authority as an adult and their mother instead of her ACTIVELY handing the reins of authority over to me, and me being the bad guy as the scolding Daddy, while she gets to be a playmate and love pillow named Moooommy!; and to be part of keeping our children safe from what goes on outside the home, like being present and taking notice when the kids are running after a ball into the road, yes, I know they are seven and nine — Geez!), but this is not the culture or even the *era* that she is familiar with, and she is exhibiting much less flexibility than I have been willing to give.
    I admit, when I proposed to her those 13 years ago, I thought I was marrying my girlfriend, who just so happened to be my first “adult” girlfriend. [I was 26. You may laugh.] My wife, unbeknown to me, considered marriage to be a business arrangement, according to the traditional model above, about 20 years out of date even by Japanese standards. My wife told me so, *after we were married*. I told her I married her because I loved her. [Am I strange?] My wife told me YEARS LATER that she married me because I loved her. [Does anyone else see a cultural misunderstanding or communication gap here? Did she and I have some inaccurate assumptions of we and the other were entering into?] Does anyone see a source of friction that might tear many other relationships apart, if say – this is not a hypothetical situation – my wife . . . actually loved someone else before/while being married to me?
    It took me years to get over that, though we argued about whether or not to stay together for only one day, and It took more time to try to earn her love, instead of her performing a “duty” (Yes, I am perfectly aware of what that word was used for recently on this site) among others, “for” her husband. Please recall that I still did not understand her reality at that time, and she was a very convincing actress.
    Repeat: I can say this now because that was at the start of our marriage – my wife is not bad. We just did not communicate enough before getting married. We spent too much time on dates, having teenage telephone conversations for up to five hours a night, and having sex. Our marriage was not a mistake. It is true that I am getting a lot more from my wife, than I am offering her. I have come to realize that she is the best partner for me, probably the only woman I know who would be able to put up with me, and she is incredibly supportive. For her part, she has renewed her pledge of support for me, despite some severe health, employment, and financial problems we are experiencing.
    Unsolicited, and all of this months ago: I found my wife a divorce lawyer, with language services, and have no intention of being a deadbeat dad. Quite frankly, we would not need a trial if we ever separated. Down the middle, monthly payments. Done. I got her the pamphlet for the local women and children’s shelter. I got my wife references for locally respected and highly qualified professional therapists and psychiatrists, including at least one Japanese one, and told her not to worry about how much it would cost including airfare. I’ve told her, if she feels it necessary, she and the children can leave, back to her home country naturally, just don’t make it a surprise. Ref. back to not being a deadbeat dad. I told her can even get some on the side, if she needs it, just don’t be sneaky about it. I am quite happy where I am. I didn’t mention: She maintains a separate bank account, per common Japanese custom, in addition to us having all the joint property. She has her own money, in addition to what a separation would bring. She has my approval to do what she wants. There are no real obstacles to her taking any path she would care to take, and I have presented it as such. She has her own plan of what to do if we were not together. Mine is better, cuz she can have all that, plus my money and my blessing.
    My wife chooses to be here despite claiming to understand the choices available, and my continued support. This is becoming very interesting. Since the age of 21, I have considered my life to be an ongoing soap opera. Take note that this is prior to the Truman Show.
    Now please. Seriously. Is there anyone here who would care to understand (not approve of) what I am trying to do? Can anyone see how we have tried to be flexible and see matters from the other side? Can you see we have developed as human beings and overcome some serious hurdles together? Can you see she and I both have relatively painless choices before us and choose to continue? Can you see a further need for “instruction?” Is my $180 per hour every two weeks for me only, having any positive effects?
    Or do you still want that telephone number for the local Women and Children’s shelter? Admins are here. Does someone need my contact information?
    [I've given my wife that pamphlet myself months ago, during one of my professional visits to the OB/GYN ward. I met the director of the shelter at a local take back the night type of function. They are very nice people, and despite the name, they are not anti-male. They offer 40 (24?) session long anger management programs for men, among other services. I just opened my mouth and said something about men being abusers, and she instantly shot back that men can be victims, too. Wooo. I was not even going to bring that up, and I was not expecting that reaction.]
    And this “Mr. A Male” shit is getting old. Call me Eric.

  20. Roxie
    Posted December 14, 2007 at 1:28 pm | Permalink

    Eric, I gotta be honest.
    While I am interested in your pov and what you have to say; tl, dr.

  21. sgzax
    Posted December 14, 2007 at 1:33 pm | Permalink

    Eric, are you looking for someone to edit your novel?

  22. casanova71
    Posted December 14, 2007 at 2:02 pm | Permalink

    What the hell ever happened to freedom? I enjoy the freedom to buy or NOT to buy what I like or don’t like. But I don’t try to limit what others can.
    Don’t let your own kids buy them and don’t let strangers buy them for your kids and leave everyone else alone. Problem solved.

  23. casanova71
    Posted December 14, 2007 at 2:03 pm | Permalink

    What the hell ever happened to freedom? I enjoy the freedom to buy or NOT to buy what I like or don’t like. But I don’t try to limit what others can.
    Don’t let your own kids buy them and don’t let strangers buy them for your kids and leave everyone else alone. Problem solved.

  24. DanBlather
    Posted December 14, 2007 at 2:52 pm | Permalink

    You say…” let them know that preteen vaginas aren’t commodities.”
    In other words, you are tacitly admitting that adult vaginas are commodities.
    Maybe you should deal with THAT attitude problem first. Women who believe that their gender entitles them to special treatment. Females who believe that sex is payment for dinner and a movie. There’s a short word for that.
    If not for that problem, no one would have thought of these dumb sexist panties.
    They were produced solely because manufacturers determined that there would be a willing market for them. (People who thought they were cute.)
    But you libs have never understood the free market and never will.

  25. sgzax
    Posted December 14, 2007 at 3:01 pm | Permalink

    When used in this context shouldn’t Free Market be capitalized? Like God? Because I’ve never seen it used by people in these contexts except when it was presented as an article of faith.

  26. A male
    Posted December 15, 2007 at 12:32 am | Permalink

    “Eric, are you looking for someone to edit your novel?”
    No thanks, when I used to write (always non-fiction, or to the best of my understanding), I used to edit it myself.
    No longer necessary, anyway. It seems at least one reader understands.
    Eric

  27. A male
    Posted December 15, 2007 at 12:40 am | Permalink

    “You say…’ let them know that preteen vaginas aren’t commodities.’”
    “In other words, you are tacitly admitting that adult vaginas are commodities.”
    Lame.
    Abusive husband: “You call this shit food?”
    Does it imply that the shit over there IS food?

  28. avalonmusic
    Posted January 5, 2008 at 5:49 pm | Permalink

    I have seen this on Tshirts over the years and have never seen anyone complain about it.
    And I see nothing wrong with this slogan being on panties.
    I asked my wife and a few other woman what they thought, and they agreed that they saw nothing wrong with this slogan for any age.
    And the comment about it “being moneypot between their legs”
    Is so insane that I am embarased to be human when someone has a thought like this.
    I meen come on, If this slogan was on a shirt for a infant or a 2 year old everyone whould laugh and go ahhhh.
    But stick it on underwear and people freak out.
    I think that anyone who takes this slogon as a dirty one should get thier minds out of the gutter.
    Why not focus on child bueaty pagents and the pervertedness of cartoons shown on tv.

  29. avalonmusic
    Posted January 5, 2008 at 5:50 pm | Permalink

    I have seen this on Tshirts over the years and have never seen anyone complain about it.
    And I see nothing wrong with this slogan being on panties.
    I asked my wife and a few other woman what they thought, and they agreed that they saw nothing wrong with this slogan for any age.
    And the comment about it “being moneypot between their legs”
    Is so insane that I am embarased to be human when someone has a thought like this.
    I meen come on, If this slogan was on a shirt for a infant or a 2 year old everyone whould laugh and go ahhhh.
    But stick it on underwear and people freak out.
    I think that anyone who takes this slogon as a dirty one should get thier minds out of the gutter.
    Why not focus on child bueaty pagents and the pervertedness of cartoons shown on tv.

  30. Lynne C.
    Posted December 7, 2008 at 12:45 am | Permalink

    This is a very good observation. Notice how the more healthy and less fattening food is more expensive as well, and the stuff that is really bad for you is cheap.

  31. jigglebots
    Posted December 26, 2008 at 11:18 pm | Permalink

    it is not that serious. they are just underwear. underwear in the junior dept. say a lot of stuff and you’re not complaining about those are you. get it over anything can be offensive. if you don’t like tada DON’T BUY IT!!!!!!!!!

  32. menexis
    Posted April 30, 2009 at 6:17 pm | Permalink

    I think that this is a funny article. got me rolling

  33. susanb
    Posted July 2, 2009 at 3:48 pm | Permalink

    this definitely has me laughing right now. I am not sure what to think about this. What were they thinking about this.
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