bclarinet

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By bclarinet • 16 years ago

Realizing you suffered abused 7 years after the fact

Firstly, I will start this post by stating that I am mostly writing this for catharthic reasons. I’ve read many posts on abuse over the years (both on this site and on others). It’s an obviously troubling issue that I wish no one had to suffer through. I always considered myself to be one of the lucky ones that never went through it. Because of (possibly) unrelated issues, I have been going to therapy, and as a result, I have been doing a lot of soul searching and digging into my past for possible explanations for current behaviour patterns. I have found the experience to be both liberating and painful.

While doing some of this exploration into my past, I kept coming back to one relationship which seemed to have left a mark on me. Whenever I thought about that relationship, I realized that I still carried a lot of anger in me and I still have not forgiven myself for staying in it. He was definitely an asshole and he was defintely the worst boyfriend I had ever had, but I pretty much just left it at that. But then I started to think about why I felt that way about him. What were the behaviours he exhibited to warrant that label? That’s when a light clicked and I feel like an idiot that it didn’t click before.

I started to think about the times when we were “play” fighting. Except it wasn’t “play” ...

By bclarinet • 16 years ago

Stella Artois Ad

I saw this commercial on TV last night for Stella Artois beer:

In the past, I’ve felt that Stella Artois had some really different and quite interesting advertising. Many of their past ads did not fall into that same boring formula of too many beer ads: parties, young men drinking beer, and those young men being surrounded by attractive young women.
This last commercial from Stella really rubs me the wrong way. They are basically comparing a glass of beer to a woman and saying that both are “a thing of beauty”. Thoughts?

I saw this commercial on TV last night for Stella Artois beer:

In the past, I’ve felt that Stella Artois had some really different and quite interesting advertising. Many of their past ads did not fall into ...

By bclarinet • 16 years ago

Women’s Golf – getting more viewership via sexism

I stumbled upon this article and video this morning on Yahoo about Anna Rawson.
I don’t follow golf, but this article interested me because it’s basically about how Anna Rawson wants to up the viewership of women’s golf because she is concerned that the media doesn’t give women’s golf the same kind of coverage that they do to men’s golf. This is a valid point, and something worth addressing and exploring. However…it appears that most of Anna’s ideas for bringing in new viewership are quite sexist. Anna is not new to sexist advertising as she was declared Maxim’s “sexiest athlete”, and she is also a spokesperson for GoDaddy (a company notorious for their constant overtly sexist ...

By bclarinet • 16 years ago

Having your talents undermined because you’re “the girl” in the band?

I work as a professional musician. I did a lot of schooling for this…I have both a Bachelors degree and a Masters degree in Music, plus I did a lot of extra study beyond that. Currently I play in several ensembles that specialize in freely improvised music – sometimes verging on experimental sounds. There are very few women in my field playing this type of music. I am almost always either the only woman in the band, and i’m sometimes the only woman in the festival or larger event. The musicians closest to me respect my talent and i’m often considered to be the strongest player in these groups and these concerts. However….being that i’m female, this has sometimes been ...

I work as a professional musician. I did a lot of schooling for this…I have both a Bachelors degree and a Masters degree in Music, plus I did a lot of extra study beyond that. Currently I ...

By bclarinet • 17 years ago

Bachelor Parties and their portrayal on tv

Last night I was watching an episode of the tv show “Dexter”. I quite enjoy this show a lot and find it to be very intelligently written. However, last night I saw an episode with a segment that rubbed me the wrong way. In this particular episode, the main character, Dexter, is getting married and the token pervert at his work (not his best man) throws a Bachelor Party for him. In the show, it was just a given that there had to be strippers there. None of the men at this party were even that close to Dexter, and it was clear that this really wasn’t what he wanted anyway. There were a ...

Last night I was watching an episode of the tv show “Dexter”. I quite enjoy this show a lot and find it to be very intelligently written. However, last night I saw an episode with ...