The Power of Positive Talk

This past Friday night I was with a couple of my friends getting ready to head out to our local bars. As we were getting ready my friend made a comment about how she hated her “fat”, “jiggly” arms. I absolutely hated to hear this. So I said we should stop saying negative things about ourselves and only comment on the positive things. I suggested we go around and tell each other something we admired about the other person. We each commented on the others hair or eyes or boobs. But then I suggested we move past our physical characteristics and compliment each others’ internal attributes. My friends told me how I was a great listener and I told them how I felt I could tell them anything without being judged.

Now this may sound pretty cheezy, but believe me, it was powerful! I personally felt great! It’s amazing how a little compliment from your friend can make you feel so awesome, so empowered!! And I can’t speak for my friends, but they seemed to feel pretty great too.

I’ve heard over and over how negative talk is so inhibiting and demeaning to us when we speak it to ourselves constantly. As a habitual negative self-talker, I completely understand and agree. I also feel this effect occurs when we negative self-talk among friends. Not only does it hurt the individual, it also hurts those around her. So why not stop the negative and replace it with positive self-talk?? It’s effects are unbelievable! It makes me wonder how we ever got into the habit of downplaying ourselves in the first place.

I have been very empowered lately by some of the things I’ve been reading. One of those is from Feministing’s own Courtney Martin. Her book “Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters” made me take an honest look at myself and how destructive I was being. She allowed me to look at myself from an outside view, and she also gave me the inspiration and understanding I needed to overcome my negative self-view and replace it with a stronger, happier one.

So I challenge each of you to stop the negative talk and replace it with the positive. You’ll be pleasantly surprised by the results.