For days I have been mulling over the case in West Virginia where a woman allegedly wielded a knife to force her estranged husband and his friend to give her oral sex. I am ashamed to say that I initially responded to the story with nervous laughter and shock. I laughed because it was comical to read about the act of oral sex being talked about as if it was such a formal procedure. This business of a woman who “commenced to undress herself,” or a man who “declined said invitation” just threw me. I was shocked because my own stereotypes about men led me to wonder why two men couldn’t simply overpower this woman.

I’ll also admit that my ...