Posts Tagged Masculinity

Yes, Michael Sam is a distraction — from our bullshit ideas of masculinity

Future Hall of Fame football coach Tony Dungy said he wouldn’t have drafted Michael Sam, the first openly gay player to be taken in the NFL draft, because he “wouldn’t want to deal with all of it.” He’d be a distraction, according to Dungy.

I get where he’s coming from. Seriously. What with all the media attention Sam is going to get. All the cameras following him around. Think of how fans of the team would constantly try to get his attention, and fans from opposing teams would hate him, and people who don’t even follow sports would form opinions of him without knowing him. He’ll constantly be doing interviews and commercials and being ...

Future Hall of Fame football coach Tony Dungy said he wouldn’t have drafted Michael Sam, the first openly gay player to be taken in the NFL draft, because he “wouldn’t ...

The one where I need help understanding why MRAs don’t become feminists

I have to confess that I’ve never paid much attention to “Men’s Rights Activists.” By “not much” I mean “none at all and why would I do that to myself.” Even before I identified as a feminist, the whole concept of an MRA seemed silly. Our entire society is centered around guaranteeing the rights of cisgender hetero-identified men, with a corrupted definition of “rights” that has included the ability to oppress. What exactly is an MRA fighting for?

Apparently, there are issues MRAs care deeply about, where they believe men have been disadvantaged. OK. Sure. I’ll bite. Talk to me MRAs. Tell me what’s on your mind.

I have to confess that I’ve never paid much attention to “Men’s Rights Activists.” By “not much” I mean “none at all and why would I do that to myself.” Even before I identified as a ...

On masculinity, homophobia, and cutting the grass

When I was fifteen or sixteen, my father asked me if I was gay. As is his way, he didn’t actually ask me. He made a statement intended to elicit a response which would answer the question he really meant to ask. We have issues with communication in my family.

I was cutting the grass, as any teenager raised in the suburbs was responsible for doing and hating. Cutting the grass is stupid. My attitude and body language reflected my feelings about cutting the grass. My father noticed this and made an observation. He said, “you know, you show more enthusiasm for baking than you do cutting the grass.”

I had been baking since I was ten. It was the age my ...

When I was fifteen or sixteen, my father asked me if I was gay. As is his way, he didn’t actually ask me. He made a statement intended to elicit a response which would answer the question ...

Feministing Jamz: On love and diaspora with Gabriel Teodros


Seattle-based emcee Gabriel Teodros knows another world is possible, and he is bringing that world to life through his music. A second-generation Ethiopian American, Teodros explores themes of diaspora, blackness, masculinity, resistance, and love through his music, which is always on point. This remains the case on his new record, Children of the Dragons, and we had a chance to chat with him about feminism, music, and the meaning of “home.”  Check it out! 


Seattle-based emcee Gabriel Teodros knows another world is possible, and he is bringing that world to life through his music. A second-generation Ethiopian American, Teodros explores themes of diaspora, blackness, masculinity, resistance, and love through ...

Friday Feminist Fuck Yeah: #AllMenCan

In the aftermath of the Isla Vista killings, as the MRA scum of the internet have come out to defend Rodger’s worldview if not his actions and a disturbing number of ostensibly non-sexist men have tried to downplay the role of misogyny in his crimes, #yesallwomen became a robust and cathartic rallying cry. Now, Elizabeth Plank from PolicyMic offers #allmencan as space for men who are also tired of misogyny to show that the #notallmen contingent doesn’t speak for them. 

In the aftermath of the Isla Vista killings, as the MRA scum of the internet have come out to defend Rodger’s worldview if not his actions and a disturbing number of ostensibly ...

saying room for cats image 1

New Favorite Tumblr: Saving Room For Cats

It turns out we’ve been wrong. The well-documented phenomenon of men taking up too much space on the train as if to air out a particularly large set of balls that has enraged women since time immemorial (or at least since the invention of public transit) is not, in fact, about a gendered sense of entitlement to fill up public space or a performance of masculinity.

There is actually a perfectly reasonable explanation: they’re just saving room for cats. Very large cats.

On behalf of feminists everywhere, our sincerest apologies to all sprawling men and their furry friends.

More after the jump. 

It turns out we’ve been wrong. The well-documented phenomenon of men taking up too much space on the train as if to air out a particularly large set of balls that has enraged women ...

Misogynistic gun extremists are harassing women speaking out for gun reforms

Mother Jones has an important and disturbing piece about how gun extremists are harassing women speaking out for gun reforms.

Ever since the Sandy Hook massacre, a small but vocal faction of the gun rights movement has been targeting women who speak up on the issue—whether to propose tighter regulations, educate about the dangers to children, or simply to sell guns with innovative security features. The vicious and often sexually degrading attacks have evolved far beyond online trolling, culminating in severe bullying, harassment, invasion of privacy, and physical aggression. Though vitriol flows from both sides in the gun debate, these menacing tactics have begun to alarm even some entrenched pro-gun conservatives.

The women featured in the piece — ...

Mother Jones has an important and disturbing piece about how gun extremists are harassing women speaking out for gun reforms.

Ever since the Sandy Hook massacre, a small but vocal faction of the gun rights movement ...

Dear depression and self-loathing: Fuck you

I feel as though I should start this by saying, through all his faults, I do love my father. Truly. OK, now to the story.

I’ve been lying to people for weeks. No “big” lies, but not exactly “little” lies either. But lies most of us tell. They ask, “How are you?” and I respond, “I’m doing aight.” I’m not. I’m not aight. I’m the furthest thing from it.

I should have caught it earlier. The weird sleep patterns, the lack of appetite, the increased alcohol consumption, the fatigue, the lack of motivation to do even the things I enjoy. Depression. I’ve been here so many times before. I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder and depression back in 2008, after spending ...

I feel as though I should start this by saying, through all his faults, I do love my father. Truly. OK, now to the story.

I’ve been lying to people for weeks. No “big” lies, but not ...

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