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Heather @theoutcast ?

active 3 years, 4 months ago
  • Heather commented on the blog post The Feministing Five: Zach Wahls   3 years, 6 months ago · View

    I hope we hear from many, many more children who have grown up in same sex parent families. It will further prove the fact that these children grow into great adults and it will hopefully build support for the same sex marriage movement.

  • Excellent post! The abortion debate totally reeks of moral and sexual control over women.

    People totally buy into the “childbirth is punishment” for women. Unfortunately, there has been little on the part of mothers to reverse this perception on a large scale.

  • I think the casual sex issue is a factor. When we are single women, it’s as if sex and adventure is the end-game or the goal. Women are not encouraged to plan (responsibly and/or financially) or look forward to a living a life that may included roles that involve nurturing family or children. Hook-ups and [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Hi Jenny, I guess I could say that today I am lamenting the years when I could have taken women’s studies in college. Based on my personal experiences, addressing the patriarchal systems (social, economic, religious) is absolutely essential. If that falls within radical feminism, then I suppose that’s where I would fit. You are right [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Again Matt, thanks for your thoughtful response. Norway is an excellent example generous maternity/paternity policies, complete with government grants and subsized childcare. I simply do not foresee this happening in America any time soon, since it “reeks of scary socialism”. An ideal maternity policy would also lend itself to criticism of “exceptionalism” for mothers by [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Thanks Nazza, My other post drew a greater deal of criticism. Fortunately, most commenters here have been fair and curious but none have responded to my comments. I find it interesting that one person here was almost afraid to agree with my post. As a mother she could agree with me on the complexity with [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Hi Ellestar, Thank you for your sharing your thoughts. Some of your comments tie to points mentioned by Matt. Hopefully, you will note the related responses. I kind of wrote a book :) For me equal care falls in the same category as does equal opportunities/access. You are right to point out sameness/equal equivalent. It’s [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Hi Matt, Thank you for your thoughtful comments. I think it is time to emphasize the “being equal” part. “Be equal” is all I have ever heard. This means we all follow a path similarly: education, career, 401K. Men and women can both do those things equally. I am very grateful for it. But women [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Thank you Rachel, That is key — fully access to opportunities and choices for all men, women and mothers! What many fail to consider is how many choices are taken off the table when women do the unthinkable: bear a child, want to nurture that child in a way that is instinctive to her, and [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Honeybee, Thank you for sharing. It’s important that all feminists who are not with children especially consider what we are experiencing now as mothers. We are truly hitting a wall and having to do it all. Our husbands are helping but they are fundamentally different and it is causing mothers to take on too much [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    To the moderator, I accidentally pressed “report comment” when I intended to hit reply. I did not intend to report this comment. This post is in conjunction with my other post, Living The Dream (Like A Man). It may surprise you that I am actually a full-time working mom with a child that is 3 [...]

  • Heather wrote a new blog post: Living The Dream (With A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Some men have perceived the feminist movement as a great injustice to their rights to be served dinner, have the house vacuumed more than once every two weeks and their feet rubbed frequently (among other things). 
     
    It is no secret that women’s financial independence and access to financial power has redefined the American family and how it functions. The feminist movement is credited for opened doors for women to reach their fullest [...]
  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Jenny, “But what about times when-statistically not as high, but it does happen–it’s the woman who runs off and abandons her family?” It’s hard for him, too. He tends to remarry at some point. Extended family tends to step in and help more because they expect more help. I saw this with my uncle. My [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    “Well, they don’t give birth, but without men’s biological contribution, women would not give birth either.” — True, but a man’s biological contribution takes minutes (literally). A woman’s takes years, especially if the guy skips town — which is why I want to connect sex with motherhood so that women do not have be consistently [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Hi Jenny, I say that men would certainly see what I say as patronizing is because they are not the one’s in nature who give birth — as evidenced by the fact that they do not design social and economic systems informed by that experience. This in my view is the same as woman saying [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Hi Lara, I will respond to all your comments here. It won’t let me reply in the other box. Please note, that the reference to Heidi Montag is completely sarcastic. It is because someone wrote an article that says she embodies the “new feminism”. My comments before that photo are: “But without a president, pope [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Jenny, I have written quite a lot here and never discounted feminism. Please re-read the entire post and the comments — where I state that I had not planned to have a child either. I was contentedly moving forward in my life childless. I can relate to you very well as a single woman with [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Well maybe you feel patronized by those statements. I suppose we’ll never see moms make much headway in the world because men would certainly see what I say as patronizing. I wrote about this topic (sort of) on my blog in a post called “Be Sure to Add Mom to Your Resume”. It discusses why [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    Hi Lara, Thanks for your thoughts. The idea that women without children feel patronized when women who have children discuss the empowerment aspect of childbirth IS a problem. It’s the empowerment of that experience that is grossly marginalized by men and women alike. I know this — I carried the same mind set. You make [...]

  • Heather commented on the blog post Living The Dream (Like A Man)   3 years, 7 months ago · View

    The reason you don’t know about the universal “ultimate” result of sex is because you haven’t experienced becoming a mother and experienced the alchemity and wonder of a new life stirring within. I would have made the very same comments as you make here prior to having had that experience. For me and my partner, [...]

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