Posts Written by sejones101

in hell.

I’ve written about the abuse I experienced as an undergraduate at a religious university; some of you may have read my recent guest post on this site about feminism and recently. And some of you may have even read my blog, anthonybsusan.wordpress.com, and may know that I discussed the assault in greater detail there. I’m not linking to it because it’s triggering. So are the comments.

And I can’t believe I didn’t expect it. I’ve read about the badgering women experience when they talk about assault but I’d had yet to experience it. But that’s been my personal hell for the past two days. My ex is now posting on my blog, exhibiting a total failure to understand the concept of “no contact” as explained to him by the police, and he has now publicly threatened to sue me. To cap it all of there are men’s rights activists trolling me, and some whacko advising him to “find his own recourse under common law.”

This is hell. It’s got to be. It’s worse than the nightmares I’ve had about him. And so I am looking for advice, any advice. How do I deal with this? How do I keep myself together and my head up? How do I keep faith in myself when I’m being told that I am a liar and a delusional woman? I just want all of this to be over.

on Quiverfulls, apostasy, and maybe learning how to dance.

I’m new to the feminist movement. Consider me something of an ideological refugee: I have spent all twenty-two years of my life immersed in the fundamentalist Christian subculture, and my hasty departure from this movement occurred barely two years ago. Not that I’d really been a model fundamentalist before then. I got expelled from Christian high school for being a “disturbing influence.” I’m still not quite sure what that means, but I like the sound of it. But despite the accumulated trauma of two decades spent in the movement, leaving it was a difficult decision.

Those of you who have experienced life in this or similar subcultures will understand this. It sounds simple, right? Your religion is telling you that your ...

I’m new to the feminist movement. Consider me something of an ideological refugee: I have spent all twenty-two years of my life immersed in the fundamentalist Christian subculture, and my hasty departure from this movement occurred barely ...

dex, the anti-gay

I really don’t have an intelligent response to this. This is one of those stories that causes the rational part of my brain to shut down and wail in a dark corner. Apparently it’s not enough that every aspect of society forces human beings into tightly defined gender roles. Now it’s time to reinforce them biologically. It’s worse, somehow, that a woman is doing this to other women. It reminds me of the first time I heard Sarah Palin call herself a feminist, or the numerous times I’ve listened to my fundamentalist Christian mother’s comments on gender roles. Bullshit. Utter, total, complete bullshit. And it’s dangerous bullshit, too.

I really don’t have an intelligent response to this. This is one of those stories that causes the rational part of my brain to shut down and wail in a dark corner. Apparently it’s not enough ...

abused? fuck you.

I graduated from college today (well, unofficially. I get my diploma in December). It’s a momentous occasion for anyone, but after a month of dealing with severe depression, harassment from my ex-boyfriend and the suicide of my next-door neighbor, it was an even bigger deal for me. I’d gone to the police to prevent my ex from having any contact with me. And who do I see in the front row of the audience? Maybe I shouldn’t be surprised. He’s the son of the university president. Maybe I was wasting my time by going to the local authorities. 

And I’m trying to wrap my mind around this loud “Fuck you!” from my ex and his family. What kind of sick fuck ...

I graduated from college today (well, unofficially. I get my diploma in December). It’s a momentous occasion for anyone, but after a month of dealing with severe depression, harassment from my ex-boyfriend and the suicide of my ...

support groups?

I’m trying to move on from an abusive situation with an ex-boyfriend, and it’s been very difficult. I attend therapy on a regular basis, but I think it might help me to talk to other women who have been through similar situations. Does anyone have experience with support groups like this? I’d be willing to try an online group too. 

I’m trying to move on from an abusive situation with an ex-boyfriend, and it’s been very difficult. I attend therapy on a regular basis, but I think it might help me to talk to other women who ...

no more

On Friday afternoon, I went to the police station. First: I attend school in a miniscule Midwestern town with a church on every corner. The police force is exactly what you’d expect of such a town. And I’m still unsure if I’m grateful or disappointed. The dispensation of fatherly advice on the part of a police chief is quaint but when you’re there to file a criminal complaint against your ex-boyfriend, it’s not exactly what you’re looking for. 

I’ve heard a lot of things these past few weeks. My mother told me that all women have to deal with this, as if domestic abuse is a rite of passage. Your ex threatened you with retaliation if you went to the authorities? ...

On Friday afternoon, I went to the police station. First: I attend school in a miniscule Midwestern town with a church on every corner. The police force is exactly what you’d expect of such a town. And ...