Melissa A. Fabello

(Originally posted at ToughxCookies.)

In my lived experience, there have been two categories of nice guys: the genuinely kind, sensitive, gentle men to whom I often find myself attracted (like my current boyfriend – shout out to your awesomeness), and the sort of creepy, obsessive ones who continually self-proclaim that they are genuinely kind, sensitive, gentle men.

This one goes out to the latter – to the ones who whine about the friend zone, to the ones who tweet about how girls always go for the assholes, to the ones who complain that nice guys finish last, to the ones who constantly wonder why their female friends don’t want to date them.

Because here’s the thing, nice guys: we don’t not date you because you’re nice.  We don’t not date you because you’re not enough of an asshole for us to feel challenged.  We don’t relegate you to “the friend zone” because we’re teases or because we’re bitches – and certainly not because we’re sluts.  It’s not that we don’t know what we’re missing or that we can’t see how great you are.  It’s not that you’re not an amazing person for us to have in our lives or because you have some gut-wrenching physical deformity.  Nope.

We don’t date you because we’re not attracted to you.