KellyWilz

Kelly Wilz is a cultural critic and an Associate Professor of Communication/Theatre Arts at UW--Marshfield/Wood County where she explores the intersections of education, media literacy, gender, politics and pop culture. The focus of her research is on rhetorical constructions of gender, violence, and dissent within the context of U.S. war culture, specifically guided by issues of how dissent and a re-articulation of dominant narratives function as a response to pro-war rhetoric. Related topics of interest include how dehumanizing and demonizing rhetoric extend beyond war to issues of social violence based on discourses of race, gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity, and other identity markers. Follow her on Twitter at @KellyLWilz and on her blog at dissentandcookies.org.

Posts Written by Kelly
By KellyWilz • 8 years ago

Rape Culture 101: A Love Letter to My Fellow Rape Survivors

It wasn’t your fault.  I believe you.  What happened to you was rape.  You are not alone.  Those are things I wish someone had said to me when I was raped.  But that didn’t happen.  I never reported my assault because I was 18. Because he was my sister’s friend. Because it wasn’t “rape rape.” Because I was more concerned with being pregnant or having an STD than getting revenge on my rapist. Because I was a virgin and had no idea what had just happened to me. And my story is not uncommon. And the repercussions of what happened to me are also not uncommon: anxiety, depression, total loss of self, unwillingness to trust, dysfunctional relationship with sex and my own body–this is what happens to those who are raped.  But we live in a culture where we don’t talk about these things. Because it’s traumatic. Because it’s embarrassing. Because we blame ourselves, or others blame us for our actions.  Because who wants to tell their new partner about how they have a really difficult time with intimacy because they were raped?  These aren’t first date discussions, and sadly they end up being non-discussions because we live in a culture that doesn’t talk about the bad, the horrifying, and the traumatic.  We live in a Facebook era where we only ever want to show the best parts of ourselves to the detriment of so many who believe they are the only ...