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By elanafulana • 13 years ago

Being Allies Against Male Circumcision

A few days ago Phenicks posted an article in the feministing community about the relationship between circumcision and feminism. She asked:

If one of our rallying cries is bodily autonomy and we’d raise all hell when AAP briefly decided to allow "nicking" of female newborn genitals, does being against male circumcision become a feminist issue on the grounds of bodily autonomy or is it the universal right of a parent to SONS to do with their child’s genitals as they please?

Feminists have been fighting hard for decades for the right to bodily autonomy. We fight for the right to control our fertility and we fight against sexual assault. It’s obvious that feminists should be allies against circumcision, and its downright hypocritical for us not to be. However, we have a long way to go towards being effective allies and ending circumcision.

We need to start by recognizing that cutting up a child’s genitals to make permanent bodily modifications is child abuse. Full Stop.

Once we recognize that circumcision is child abuse, we can start treating it like child abuse. In feminist spaces, we don’t debate about whether other forms of child abuse are acceptable or whether they should be legal. The fact that circumcision is even up for debate is highly offensive and can be triggering for victims.

From here, we can start supporting the Genital Mutilation Prohibition Act, which would prohibit genital mutilation of all children and non-consenting adults. This bill has been proposed ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

The Privilege of Choosing to Leave One’s Relationships Unharmed by Oppression

Recently I was calling out a male friend of mine on a sexist project that he has been working on. Part of his response was that standing up against sexism harms some of his important relationships.

This response ignores the fact that sexism strains relationships between men and women, but I’d like to focus on the privilege of being able to choose when to allow oppression to harm one’s relationships.

My entire life has been filled with relationships that have been harmed by sexism.

Sexism and homophobia have ruined my relationships with my parents, possibly permanently. By extension, it has also made my relationships with the rest of my family more difficult. Almost every guy I have ever dated has treated me ...

Recently I was calling out a male friend of mine on a sexist project that he has been working on. Part of his response was that standing up against sexism harms some of his important relationships.

This response ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

It’s Personal Now

Cross posted from End Oppression .

I have struggled with varying degree’s of depression for the past 10 years of my life, and have just come out of the most severe episode that I’ve ever had. I’m a bisexual woman and had been unemployed and living with my homophobic and sexist parents.

I have been a feminist my entire life and have been against homophobia since long before I identified as queer. Living with my parents has forced me to be silent about who I am and what I value.

Though they don’t realize it, my parents have communicated to me over and over again that they believe I have less value and am less worthy of respect than they are.

When I ...

Cross posted from End Oppression .

I have struggled with varying degree’s of depression for the past 10 years of my life, and have just come out of the most severe episode that I’ve ever had. I’m ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

Portland Pride Parade

This last summer, I filmed the Portland Pride Parade with a friend of mine. I’ve only been to the pride festival two times now, but I absolutely love it. In no other place have I ever felt so much like everyone is there to support each other and like everyone is free to be themselves. I wanted to try to capture that feeling in film.

I thought I would share it with the Feministing community:

This last summer, I filmed the Portland Pride Parade with a friend of mine. I’ve only been to the pride festival two times now, but I absolutely love it. In no other place have I ever felt ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

Transphobic Victim Blaming

This is my third post on transphobia in what may become a series. See posts one and two

At the time of this writing, my previous post regarding having sex while stealth has 273 comments, many of which are incredibly transphobic. Comments included accusations that trans people are being deceptive, that for a trans person to have sex without disclosing disrespects the sexual orientation of their partner, comparisons between trans people and sexually transmitted diseases, comparisons between trans people and the KKK, and statements that it is trans peoples responsibility to subjugate themselves for the comfort of transphobic people.

This is too much to cover in one post, but I would like to focus on one particularly hypocritical ...

This is my third post on transphobia in what may become a series. See posts one and two

At the time of this writing, my previous post regarding having sex while stealth has 273 ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

Having Sex While Stealth is Not Sexual Assault

I’m following up on these two posts about coming out as transgender to romantic partners.

In both threads, there were people who not only argued that trans people have an ethical obligation to come out to their partners, but a few people were even arguing that having sex while stealth is sexual assault. That is, they were arguing that transphobic people can’t consent to sex without knowing their partner’s trans status, as such knowledge would effect their decision making. Thus, they argued, trans people must either come out to their partners or be celibate.

This line of thinking is deeply disturbing for several reasons.

Before getting started, I’ll point out that most of this discussion applies only to post-operative ...

I’m following up on these two posts about coming out as transgender to romantic partners.

In both threads, there were people who not only argued that trans people have an ethical obligation to come out to ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

Coming Out as Transgender to Romantic Partners

A few days ago there was a post about a Seventeen Magazine article regarding a woman who dated an abusive trans man who was outed when she called the police. He later explained that he was scared that she would break up with him if she knew. In the article she says “The thing is, I would have stayed with him if he’d been honest. I loved him that much… But it was Derek’s lies that really broke my heart.”

The title of the article was “My Boyfriend Turned Out to be a Girl.” The poster was arguing that while the title was transphobic, the content of the article was not.

The fact that he was abusive was not the point ...

A few days ago there was a post about a Seventeen Magazine article regarding a woman who dated an abusive trans man who was outed when she called the police. He later explained that he was ...
By elanafulana • 14 years ago

Provable Positive Consent

The idea that by default womens bodies are available for sexual use and that women have to revoke consent every single time is Fucked .

This should be common sense, yet for some reason people have this irrational fear that if their partner doesn’t have to say "no", that they might accidentally rape them.

You don’t accidentally rape someone. How can you not notice when your partner freezes in fear? Or when they are totally unresponsive? When they put their arms in front of their body to shield themselves from you ? When they stare at the ceiling the entire time? When they’re in pain?

Maybe you don’t care because neither your partner’s pleasure nor consent is important to you. In other words, ...

The idea that by default womens bodies are available for sexual use and that women have to revoke consent every single time is Fucked .

This should be common sense, yet for some reason people have this irrational ...

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