Ashley

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By Ashley • 11 years ago

Single Most Annoying Question

Today the Huffington Post had a “debate” about whether or not women can or cannot be happy being single. This article automatically causes me to be defensive not only because I am happy as a single woman, but because NO ONE EVER asks whether men can be happy singles. This causes the perception that relationships exist only to please women and the men we partner with are just doing us a favor.

Debates like these are meant to reinforce the idea that for women, happiness is directly related to their relationship status, while for men happiness can be more strongly attributed to their job, how much money they make, or even how well the Mets played last weekend. This is dangerous because the more women hear that we can’t possibly be happy on our own, the more we believe it.

This repeated discussion is meant to shame women into refocusing our lives on the archaic, societal belief that a woman’s purpose in life is to find someone to complete her. It’s meant to make even those “selfish career-women” feel badly about not pursuing relationships because if they can’t be happy without a relationship, they are denying themselves their selfish desire for happiness by not conforming to society’s gender roles and hitching up with the first guy to look longingly at them.

By Ashley • 12 years ago

Ode to Mom

I love my dads. I really do. I have been blessed with being related wonderful examples of exceptional human beings of both genders. But there has also been a lot in the news and media about motherhood from Rick Santorum’s disdain for single mothers, to “maverick Mom’s.” In these stories, I hear a lot about the “important male role model.” But when was the last time you heard about the “important female role model”?

I can’t think of anything, and yet, I am plagued by Public Service Announcements calling men to stand up and be a father. And while I appreciate the call for male responsibility in parenting, I can’t help but feel like this over-representation of fathers and under-representation of ...

By Ashley • 12 years ago

Listen here, Rosen-haters

More than likely, I’m preaching to the choir here. However, I will feel much better once I get my rant out into the webiverse.

Hilary Rosen is not a woman/mother-hater. She is simply questioning what authority a woman who has never had economic burdens or had to clip coupons or face the huge double-standards of the workforce can possibly have on “women and the economy”. A valid question. Now, if Anne Romney was a stay-at-home mother like MY mother, and had been married to a man who did NOT make millions of dollars per year, if she had to worry about how they were going to feed their kids and still give her the freedom to stay at home, if she ...

More than likely, I’m preaching to the choir here. However, I will feel much better once I get my rant out into the webiverse.

Hilary Rosen is not a woman/mother-hater. She is simply questioning what authority a woman ...

By Ashley • 12 years ago

Not-so-inherent differences

Last night at a city council meeting I attended, female officer was confirmed in her official appointment as a police officer. I was impressed that all three women on the city council (out of 12 total council members) not only congratulated this officer on her appointment, but said we need more women police officers and expressed their happiness in adding another woman to the ranks of the police force in our city (it was mentioned that a little over half of the police force is now female).

I was surprised, though, that not one male council member congratulated her or expressed a need for women on the police force. Instead, the bulk of the comments made by the male council members ...

By Ashley • 12 years ago

Why Rush Isn’t The Worst

Rush Limbaugh’s statements about Sandra Fluke, and his pathetic apology, made me so mad I couldn’t see straight. I daydreamed about confronting him face to face and giving him a piece of my mind and possibly throw a pie in his face. I talked about it. I wrote about it.

I still wish Rush Limbaugh would choke on his tongue, but unfortunately, his voice isn’t what scares me. No, what really scares me is the number of women who have lashed out against Sandra Fluke for an initiative that we, as women, should all agree on. Yesterday, I read on Newsweek that Patricia Heaton from “The Middle” issued a Twitterpology for things she said about Fluke via Twitter, and frankly, ...

By Ashley • 12 years ago

This Is Not A Religious Issue

I am sick and tired of hearing that the Affordable Care Act inclusion of contraception coverage is “not about women’s health.” Of course Roy Blunt can say that because to him, women don’t matter. Religious institutions matter more to him than the lives of millions of women. This is, of course, consistent with the far right stance that big business is more important than individual human rights.

And has anyone noticed that the people who say “it’s not about women’s health” NEVER say anything that remotely resembles approval of contraception? Instead, they say ridiculous things like putting an aspirin between your knees so you don’t get pregnant. You can’t fool us, Blunt. Contrary to what you obviously believe, women are not ...

By Ashley • 12 years ago

The beauty myth

A couple of weeks ago, I started watching a new television show on Hulu Plus called The New Girl. Jess’s (Zooey Deschanel) quirky and “adorkable” personality and Schmidt’s (Max Greenfield) cluelessness had me falling off my couch with laughter. Then there was this episode where Jess and the two other roommates were making fun of Nick (Jake Johnson) for the size of his gut. I started to get annoyed because he wasn’t even chubby. The next scene showed him in his bedroom in front of the mirror with his shirt off. This guy is seriously like two sit-ups away from a six pack, and they were making fat jokes about him! His bottom ribs were showing, and at first, I ...