Actually, I use a combination of three. First and foremost, I'm on the pill. Next, we use a kind of rhythm method where we use condoms on the days around where if I was ovulating, I would be at increased risk of pregnancy.

No babies for me!

I'm currently practicing abstinence. By practicing, I mean that I can't seem to get laid. Also, laziness seems to be a factor in this abstinence phase. Hooray for losers! :)

You could put a (male or female) next to "Sterilization" too, like you have next to "Condoms". Small point; I mention because my partner and I use vasectomy, and I hesitated to click sterilization because for all I know that might be inaccurately counted as tubal ligation.

My husband has had not one, but two vasectomies, and the freedom is great! However, when we still wanted maintain our fertility together, I used a diaphragm, which I liked a lot--no hormones, no risk, worked great (I got pregnant the first month I stopped using it).

My husband and I use condoms only. I used the pill for a few years, but forgot doses all the time which negated the point. I also hated the side effects (I like lubricating naturally, thanks) and hated the idea of pumping my body with hormone for years on end. So I told my husband if we didn't want another child we'd have to get really good with the condoms instead. And we did.

Condoms work. Somebody tell the world!

SKM, good catch. Unfortunately, I don't think I can edit it now that it's up...but you're right of course.

Me, after a couple of months of being in love with the NuvaRing, it started making me a heinous bitch. Now I'm a condoms gal!

Sterilization by way of cancer treatment, I suppose. :(

When I still had my organ, though, the condom & the pill.

sgzax has it right -- we're big condom fans. My wife didn't like the hormones, and condoms make the best sense.

And yeah, not all condoms are vegan (milk protein rears its ugly head) Check out sensualvegan.com!

LESBIANISM!!!!

Condoms for me until timing is right for that second kid (probably soon). After second kid is safely born, I'm gettin' me a vasectomy. Not 100%, I know, but good enough for me. Wouldn't be heartbroken to have a third, just don't want to plan on having a third.

@ bunny:

Me, too! Most effective bc w/sex ever, without any side effects!

I have used the NuvaRing for about 6 years. While I know some ladies who have had some issues with it, I love it. I only deal with it once a month and it's super easy to skip my cycle when I want to. And, of course, when I am seeing someone recreationally, I use condoms as well.

I have forgotten to mention it once or twice with a new partner, which for me was more humorous than problematic. But I can see how it might be a bit awkward for some.

same as ellestar--I've gotten good at taking the pills, but we still use condoms in the middle of my cycle. In fact, because we're both worriers when it comes to the possibility of pregnancy, we usually use condoms every time unless it's the couple days before or after my period.

BCP for me. I miss Alesse (I moved to England where I guess it doesn't exist) and they've put me on one called Ovranette. Oh how I love NHS sexual health (drop-in) clinics and the pill for free!

Toughie. For now I've been abstaining for life. But I realized I no longer have moral reasons to abstain but before I was ready I went on exchange. But I'm on the pill for other reasons and I would use a condom too.
Question: does anyone have an idea about how much the effectiveness of the pill goes down if you miss one day a month?

I have used the NuvaRing for about 6 years. While I know some ladies who have had some issues with it, I love it. I only deal with it once a month and it's super easy to skip my cycle when I want to. And, of course, when I am seeing someone recreationally, I use condoms as well.

I have forgotten to mention it once or twice with a new partner, which for me was more humorous than problematic. But I can see how it might be a bit awkward for some.

what about preferred method of STD protection? babies aren't the only thing that could come out of heterosexual sex. and STDs are a concern for all sexualities..

I have an implant (Implanon), which is great. Highly recommended.

Just a note.. the rhythm method and natural family planning aren't really the same thing.

I'm glad to see people talking about this topic, because I'm having an awful time with contraceptives right now.

After being on the pill since I was 16 (I'm now 24), I got off a year ago, and have been using condoms with my (same, monogamous) partner ever since. Since I had been on the pill since still undergoing puberty, I had never actually experienced my natural, settled, post-adolescent hormonal state before - it was like meeting myself for the first time! I felt so much saner and at home in my body off hormones, plus my libido returned and I am able to lubricate naturally (as sgzax mentioned above).

But recently, my S.O. developed a latex allergy, and non-latex condoms are either cheap and really baggy/uncomfortable/unreliable or expensive as sh*t (we were getting the regular ones for free from the health center where he works). Also, I have acne for the first time in my life - ugh! I'm looking for a reliable, pleasant, minimally-invasive, un-hormonal contraceptive - and I feel like there's no perfect choice for me. :(

Homosexuality. I'm looking into getting a t-shirt made that says "Prevent abortions: become a homosexual."

And to protect against STDs with penetrative toys, I use condoms.

I'm kinda non-monogamous (and possibly kinda slutty), so I like condoms.

The Pill. I've been on it since I was 18 (25 now) and it works for me. I also use condoms when I'm not in a relationship. And anytime I miss a pill or am taking antibiotics. I know too many women who have a kid because antibiotics lessened the effectiveness of the Pill.

I hate to be the angry poster, but the rhythm method, Fertility Awareness Method, and Natural Family Planning are not the same thing at all.

FAM looks at every cycle individually, and therefore you're never guessing when you're fertile like you would with the rhythm method.

What's great about FAM is that it makes you aware of you and your partner's combined fertility -- and doesn't suppress your fertility for the entire month. Personally, I like the fact that my body's hormones can return to normal after a year on the pill. (Not that the pill kills babies, and that it's not a good option for other women, but I didn't like it for me.)

Toni Weschler's Take Charge of Your Fertility is the BEST book for this birth control method, if anyone is interested.

I had to start taking birth control before I was even sexually active, which sucked. I was having insane periods that were actually causing me to become anemic, so they put me on the Pill. Since I can't do the scheduled pill-taking thing very well I soon switched to the Patch, and was on that for about 3 years. Then I discovered that the patch actually had far higher levels of estrogen than was originally thought, and heard the horror stories about women stroking out and/or dying....yeah, I switched to the NuvaRing right away (And my breasts went from a C cup to B cup in about two weeks, if that gives you any idea of how high the estrogen dose in that thing was).

I generally like the NuvaRing. It's not perfect, but it's definitely the best option for me.

lyndorr,

i asked my doctor about what would happen if i miss a day and she told me just to double up on the next day an i'd be fine. sorry i don't have any real numbers but i hope that helps.

also, FWIW, i almost never take my pill at the same time everyday and me and my SO have a lot of sex and i've still been baby free. (i'm not reccomending that people shouldnt follow directions i just don't want anyone to be super scared if they don't/can't for some reason)

it depends on which me you're asking.

me with my sweetie, a vasectomy.

me with other lovers, a condom. i too was surprised at the ignoring of stds.

me with my first husband, with whom i was monogamous, natural family planning, which as another mentioned, is not at all the same as the rhythm method. it worked for us for the 8 or so years we used it once i came across the concept.

@ ivoryalleykat:
I have a friend who had similar struggles with BC: the pill variety was not an option (don't recall why--maybe estrogen-sensitivity) and she is allergic to latex. Her solution was a low-dose hormone non-estrogen method. Possibly an IUD like Mirena.

You should talk to your gyno about missing a pill and how it effects your bcp effectiveness. There also might be info that comes with your pill pack.

Missing a pill has different results on the pills effectiveness depending on when in the month you missed it.

Interesting question. I currently use BCP, but I wouldn't call it my preferred method of birth control. It's more like my preferred method of acne control and period predictor, with a side effect of birth control. I would actually prefer to use something non-hormonal, ideally FAM (psst--is "Rhythm Method" really the best option to include here?). At this point in my life, though, I'm too disorganized and see my boyfriend too rarely to pin my hopes on something like that.

Wait, you don't have "douching with Coke while standing upside down after your first time" in the list... ?!

:p

lyndorr,

i asked my doctor about what would happen if i miss a day and she told me just to double up on the next day an i'd be fine. sorry i don't have any real numbers but i hope that helps.

also, FWIW, i almost never take my pill at the same time everyday and me and my SO have a lot of sex and i've still been baby free. (i'm not reccomending that people shouldnt follow directions i just don't want anyone to be super scared if they don't/can't for some reason)

I so agree that Toni Weschler's Take Charge of Your Fertility is the best book ever. I used to be on the Pill and use condoms; Then after being on the pill for a decade and I was only 25 my doctor recommended that I give my body a break; So for the last four years my husband and I practice the fertility awareness method; I can’t believe how well it works for me, I feel like for the first time in my life I understand what is going on with my body;

4 months before we got married, my husband got a vasectomy.....now I can't even remember what it was like to think about protection before sex.

so yeah, the vasectomy thing worked out really well for us :)

Another request to change 'rhythm method' to FAM or NFP. The Rhythm method does not work to prevent pregancy. FAM/NFP does.

IUD + a condom = megaprotection! :)

I tried the Pill and had terrible side effects so I relied on condoms for about 10 years (and never had a problem). I tried to get sterilized (using Essure) and while preparing for that I was diagnosed with endometrial hyperplasia. The treatment I decided on is a Mirena IUD, which I've had for about three months now and love. It relieves my hyperplasia and works as birth control so I'm totally covered. I'm childfree, and will always be a little scared of getting unintentionally pregnant until the day I can get sterilized, but the Mirena has great numbers in terms of how well it works and since it's treating the hyperplasia I can take the trade off of a little bit of nerves about getting pregnant vs. crazy-heavy, painful periods. I still want to be sterilized though, and that may be an option for me in the future.

As far as STDs, I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years, we're monogamous (and have had STD tests) so no worries there.

I love the idea about homosexuality preventing abortions t-shirt!

I am on Implanon.

After a brief period of emotional rollercoastering, it's all settled and I feel completely normal, minus painful cramping and inconvenient bleeding.

Free on the NHS, too.

YES, condoms work all the time. I feel like people don't know this! I am fortunate to have short, light, regular periods and wouldn't want to mess with that by going on the pill. Also, I cannot afford for my boobs to get any bigger!

But I guess there are also differet factors for married women and people like me, who don't always know where that thing's been...

Yasmin! Currently, condoms too because I am on an antibiotic.

I hear a lot of women talk about Pill side effects, and just thought I'd mention that Yasmin has virtually no side effects for me. I found it after trying several other Pills that made me miserable. The only side effect seems to be an extremely short period and clearer skin!

Also, mestiza is right: missing one Pill makes no difference as long as you take it as soon as you remember, even if that means taking two in one day! Only after missing two or more pills do you need to make sure to use condoms.

I always used condoms every time and it works, but since entering a very committed relationship (and both of us are std free) Id have to say my favorite is Yaz sometimes combined with a spermicide.

Condoms and the NuvaRing - we're both paranoid about babies.

Currently: Spermicide-coated condoms for the occasional hook-up.

In past relationship: The Pill + spermicide condoms.

I have also used EC, once, after a condom broke.

I want to get sterilized because I never ever want children... but apparently I'm too young to make that decision. I'm not too young to have a baby, but I'm too young to decide I never want kids (24). Go figure.

Prayer? I love Depo, but it stripped my teeth of calcium, so Im back on the pill.

Another double-method person; pill -- Seasonale!!! -- and (usually) condoms.

My husband wants to get a vasectomy at some point (he's 26, so good luck getting someone to do it), but even then I doubt that I'll go off of my precious pill. I don't think that I could go back to having more periods, especially since each one would be a hell of a lot more painful than they are now.

We use sterilization in the form of vasectomy and I couldn't be happier. Before the vasectomy I tried for years to have a tubal ligation done, but after searching in 3 states I found no one who would perform the procedure until after I had either turned 30 years of age or given birth to a child. Evidently a woman is never too young to be a mother, but she may be too young to decide not to be one. ?!?!?!

ivoryalleykat, there are polyurethane condoms out there that are just as sturdy and reliable as latex condoms. I believe both Durex and Trojan each do a polyurethane condom.

Currently: Spermicide-coated condoms for the occasional hook-up.

In past relationship: The Pill + spermicide condoms.

I have also used EC, once, after a condom broke.

I want to get sterilized because I never ever want children... but apparently I'm too young to make that decision. I'm not too young to have a baby, but I'm too young to decide I never want kids (24). Go figure.

condoms. natural lamb ones.

expensive? not more than renting a dvd, far less than going out to movie.

much better texture and lubrication than any synthetic ones. (rubber just has a tacky, friction-y feel we don't like).

no std protection, so only for committed clean couples.

much better than pill, which made things really weird--no libido, odd paranoias, phobias, etc.

and they have worked well for years now, i.e. no preggers.

Seconded L-K. I seem to have lapsed into prolonged abstinence since my last relationship ended, primarily due to laziness. But I'm still on the Pill anyway, just in case I get lucky. :)

(Really, it'd be the Pill plus condoms. STDs are balls, I learned that the hard way.)

Does anyone find the pill makes them slightly crazy, emotion-wise? I've been on it for over a year now, so I can't honestly really remember what I was like before. Im starting to think maybe I'm just blaming perfectly natural crazy on the pill, because it's easier to say to people 'Don't mind my emotional craziness, I'm on the pill!' rather than 'The world makes me sad!!!'

I'm on the pill, but I also use condoms. And dental dams. And finger cots.

I figure the pill can take care of my birth control needs, and the rest can help protect against STDs.

I'm currently practicing abstinence. By practicing, I mean that I can't seem to get laid.

Same here!

I'm surprised that so many people use the pill. I used it off and on for about 7 years before switching to an IUD (with a couple of stints w/ the Nuvaring and the patch in between) and I can't believe how awful it made me feel and how long I tolerated it. I know that with any method, YMMV, but so many women put up with pretty awful side effects when there are much better (and equally effective) alternatives out there that so many people don't explore. Too bad our nation's version of sex education is "Don't do it."

Condoms. I really don’t like them, but they seem like the only reliable, non-permanent birth control available to a man (I am not ready to trust anyone else with this responsibility, yet). I certainly do appreciate when my partner uses something as well, though.

PS – I realize now that abstinence would be another method available to me, but that doesn’t sound fun at all.

I am not an angry poster....just...REALYL frustrated.

Why is a super-hot feminist website like this so unbelievably dumb as to put "rhythm method", which almost nobody uses (counting quickly in your head just before sex notwithstanding ;)... and leave out all of the other, actually USEFUL and PROVEN natural methods of fertility awareness?

How in control of our bodies are we?

So, I am abstinent and I've never been sexually active but it's not my 'birth control'. I mean, it is technically, because obviously I won't be getting pregnant anytime soon but that's merely a side effect. When I do choose to have sex (which will be when I want to, I'm not waiting for Jesus' OK or anything) I will use active birth control, which makes this thread a handy, informal, unscientific learning tool. So thanks.

Personally, the pill isn't birth control. I started the pill because my cycle was completely out. of. control. It was from my first period at age 11. And it only got worse with stress. After 3 periods in less than a 6 week time frame, I realized through the miracle of chemistry I didn't have to live for 24 hours in the fetal position every time I had one of my grossly unpredictable periods. So it's really not birth control for me. I use it so I can function. And yes, I've tried going off of it and trying other things, and my body promptly returned to it's irregular schedule. My doc says having a kid would help "regulate" my hormones, but I'm not ready for that, thanks.

So for actual birth control, I use condoms.

I want to add kudos to the Toni Weschler book. My husband and I use FAM, limiting intercourse without condoms to the post-ovulatory time. It's gratifying to learn to listen to your body. My sister has been on bcp's for years, and has experienced all sorts of side effects, changing brands from year to year. I've tried to convince her to give her body a break. sigh.

I'm on the pill, but I also use condoms. And dental dams. And finger cots.

I lost count of the number of straight people I've spoken with who have never heard of dental dams. Straight people can use them too! Yes, in the kind of conversations I have "dental dam" comes up a lot.

Yaz changed my life. It's the only BC that doesn't make me feel...off.

And of course, not having a boy to have sex with certainly helps the controlling of birth.

The pill made me batshit insane. I was constantly going back and forth between throwing tantrums at people and crying hysterically, so I swore off hormones.

Then I tried using a diaphragm, but the spermicide irritated my vagina AND it gave me BV.

I was thinking about a copper IUD, but I'm concerned that might give me BV too (I have the pickiest cooter in the world). Plus, I like my short, light periods.

Pregnant on the Pill.
Pregnant on the Ring.
Pregnant on the Patch.
IUD made me crazy.
My hilarious 8 year old is very good birth control in and of himself. We also like condoms too.

Sorry I can't change the poll from Rhythm to FAM/NFP, but thanks to all for the education. I wasn't really on top of what the proper terms were. My bad.

And crazylady, calling me "dumb" really doesn't do anybody any favors.

What if I'm just too blasted cranky and tired for any type of romantic relationship? Can we put an "unintended" in front of abstinence?

I'm a pill and condom sort of girl. I don't trust that I use either method perfectly, despite my best efforts, and I rather don't want to get pregnant, so...two methods at all times for this girl.

After years of bcp and a brief stint with the nuva ring, my partner and I decided to settle on condoms. The nuva-ring was great until I began having anxiety attacks that were waking me up at night. The pill's side effects such as constipation, vaginal dryness and lack of libido took the fun out of sex. Since going off the pill I lost 10 pounds, I sleep soundly at night, I exercise more, my breasts went from a D to a C cup and I'm feeling 100% better overall.

I hadn't used condoms regularly for about 10 years when we started using them. Is it my imagination or have they improved? We've been using the Electra kind.

Also, my partner is considering getting a vasectomy but we're waiting for better insurance to kick in, etc. I've had zero luck trying to get sterilized and I'm 33.

For now, condoms are the best and healthiest choice for us.

FYI for anyone using spermicide - they actually may increase your risk of contracting an STI by irritating the vaginal tissue.

I use the pill and condoms. I haven't experienced any noticeable side effects from the pill and overall it's been a pretty positive and effective method for me.

I love my IUD. I had never even considered one before my midwife suggested it, and I had heard all the scary stories from the 1970s, but they are much improved since then. I literally never have to think about it, it's as effective as sterilization, and the only side effect is slightly heavier periods, which are get better the longer I have it.

I have a non-hormonal Paraguard. I didn't want any hormones, even from low-dose pills or Mirena, while I was breastfeeding, and after five years on the Pill before pregnancy, I wanted to give my body a break, like some of the other posters said. Insurance didn't cover it, and it cost $500. But with the co-pays I used to have with the pill, it paid for itself in two years.

I've heard that sometimes women who have never had children have more problems with them, but I think women who don't want kids for sure, can't get sterilized because they're too young and don't like the idea of being on artificial hormones for 30 years should definitely look into it.

re: wednesday and jele

Your comments about not being able to get sterilized due to young age is so disheartening to me.
I have no interest in having kids, and have often thought how much simpler it would be to be sterilized, but doubted that any doctor would sterilize a 20 year old woman. I have yet to actually investigate, but it sucks to hear that my fears are true, at least for some doctors. Women are treated like children, we don't know what we really want.

It's interesting (and unsurprising) that it is acceptable for men to want to be sterilized, but women! 'oh no no, but that's an essential part of womanhood! It's instinctual, to want to be a mother. You'll change your mind when your older.'

Rgh. So, for me, condoms. I have no interest in disrupting my body with hormones. Though I'm thinking about switching to a diaphragm. Anyone use one? Thoughts?

I couldn't see the link for "see results" till I voted, so in case anyone else is missing it:

http://www.micropoll.com/akira/mpresult/422038-88045

Sodomy works for me.

I love Nuva Ring. I had to put it in bold. It's awesome. Also, Depo made me psychotic, plus 60 pounds.

Attn animeredith:

Whoa! I had the same thing (boob shrinkage) happen when I switched to Nuva. Not that Nuva shrunk my boobs, but that I'd been on a high-hormone method (evil Depo) for so many years that my boobs were way bigger.

But going back to how Depo is evil --

I was on Depo for 3 1/2 years, and I loved it for a long time. (Whoo for 4 times a year b.c.) I knew I gained A LOT of weight, but I never made the assocation, not wanting to place blame where I thought I was at fault. Then in the last year I was on it, I became SO angry. I would absolutely snap and have violent urges. Then came paranoia like nobody's business. One night when my significant other was working on his thesis, I convinced myself somehow that he was cheating on me and had been for a long time (with absolutely no evidence), and sobbed all ngiht. Then I got to a point where I had severe anxiety all the time. If I went anywhere alone, I was constantly afraid that someone was going to die. NUTS - I was nuts!

Finally, I got off Depo and switched to Nuva. Like other posters have said, it was like I found myself for the first time in years. After Depo drained (unwillingly) from my system, I became happier, more easy going and returned the laid-back approach I used to have. I've lost about half of the weight I gained while on Depo, though I acknowledge that I'm 5 years older and probably won't return to that size, which is fine. Nuva is WAY better. Nuva has lower hormones, and if you leave the ring in during the 4th week you can skip your period.

Nuva wonderful. (Depo BAD -- for me, at least.)

"I'm currently practicing abstinence. By practicing, I mean that I can't seem to get laid."

Me too. :/ I'm also on the Pill for PCOS, don't want sex without condoms, and want a tubal. ;)

When you read about the effectiveness of the Pill ("on average, about 5 out of 100 couples will get pregnant in a year while using the Pill"), they base it on "typical use" not perfect use. That means missing a pill now and then, not taking it at the exact same time each day, etc. That's why doctors always say "you'll be fine, just double up the next day."

Of course it's best to use a back-up method (condoms) if you've missed a few pills that month.

To all the pople who are mentioning having trouble getting sterilized because of your age: Don't give up!! I called several doctors and started my calls like this, "I'm 29 years old and I want to be sterilized. Will you take me as a patient?" If they had a problem with it, I moved on to the next doctor. I found a wonderful doctor on the Essure website and when I called him he said, "It's your body; it's your choice." He even went to bat for me when other doctors who assist him questioned my decision. As I wrote in my other comment above, I was diagnosed with a condition that caused me to put my sterilization plans on hold for now, but it's still an option for me if I want it.

It can be done, and doctors who believe you are able to make your decisions about your body do exist, you just have to do a little legwork to find them. Just don't give up!

I haven't been getting it on either - so abstinence for me.

Anyhow, when I did I relied on condoms back in the day. Since I haven't had much sex in my life, I am woefully ignorant of some of these methods, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't do research if need be.

To all the pople who are mentioning having trouble getting sterilized because of your age: Don't give up!! I called several doctors and started my calls like this, "I'm 29 years old and I want to be sterilized. Will you take me as a patient?" If they had a problem with it, I moved on to the next doctor. I found a wonderful doctor on the Essure website and when I called him he said, "It's your body; it's your choice." He even went to bat for me when other doctors who assist him questioned my decision. As I wrote in my other comment above, I was diagnosed with a condition that caused me to put my sterilization plans on hold for now, but it's still an option for me if I want it.

It can be done, and doctors who believe you are able to make your decisions about your body do exist, you just have to do a little legwork to find them. Just don't give up!

Tried the pill, totally killed my libido. We switched to condoms, which worked great for us (husband and myself, that is). Then we switched to Fertility Awareness and used condoms only during my fertile periods. We finally settled on Natural Family Planning (abstinence during fertile periods) for religious reasons. I absolutely love the knowledge of my body I've gained through FAM/NFP and would recommend it to anyone. As other people have mentioned Toni Wechsler's book is an amazing resources for this.

The nice thing about FAM/NFP is that if and when one decides to have a kid, it is also a great way to achieve conception in addition to avoiding it. I got pregnant on the first try by using fertility awareness.

I'd also add that FAM/NFP worked very reliably for us for the 2 years we were avoiding pregnancy and I have friends who have practiced FAM or NFP for years and years without getting pregnant. It is extremely reliable if practiced correctly.

I use Mirena and I love it!
Effective, low-dose, no remembering to take a pill.
Apparently only 1% of north american women use an IUD but 20% of female gynos do. I thought that was interesting.

I use Mirena and I love it!
Effective, low-dose, no remembering to take a pill.
Apparently only 1% of north american women use an IUD but 20% of female gynos do. I thought that was interesting.

For the first 15 years of my romantic life, my partners were women and pregnancy was not a concern. For the past seven years, my partner has been male. I started on the pill, and like many others, found its effect on my mood to be unendurable. Switched to IUD in 2005, and I absolutely love it.

For me, insertion of the IUD was briefly and sharply painful, and I was intermittently crampy for the first week after placement. Since then, I have been completely unaware of its existence, and I can have sex whenever I want!

The IUD is recommended for monogamous women, due to the increased risk of serious pelvic infection if you have a variety of (male ) sexual partners.

Sadly, I too have found myself using abstinence lately, with my fall-back protection being queer.

I'm infertile! WOOT! No joke, my body is going through premature menopause. I'll be 30 in September.

I've had ups and downs with it and have had to find vitamins to help balance out my hormones and some of the effects* it's having on my body, but the fact that I don't have to worry about pregnancy and children is a huge weight off my shoulders.

*effect include joint inflammation, migraines and insomnia, but it's stuff I've dealt with most of my life, just on a more intense scale now.*

Right now my favorite birth control method is my 10-month-old. Forget time: with the constant Daycare Plague, we haven't been healthy enough for sex in months.

I'm on the pill mostly for bad periods, but today, I found out my insurance covers 80% of Mirena, which my OB/Gyn is recommending, so I may give that a whirl this summer.

I clicked "abstainence", but is it really abstainence when it's by circumstance rather than conscious choice?

Eh, whatever. I own condoms, so if/when I do have sex, I'm covered that way (note to self: check expiration date). Hormonal birth control is a real probability, but I'd rather not right now. Definitely sterilization in another five years or so, or as soon thereafter as I can afford it.

I have the Mirena IUD and love it. Getting it put in SUCKED. But I'd gladly go through it again for 5 years of no worries.

so the percentage of pill-users has been hanging constant at about 40% all day.

and the comments about the pill have included a lot--a *lot*--of people saying how much it messes with your head.

like, makes you crazy, unhappy, unsexy, dry, anxious, insecure, etc.

man oh man.

what a messed up picture that is.

seems like this ought to be a priority for research: getting a method that has the attractions of the pill without the side-effects.

or maybe if we just leave it to the free market, the pharmaceutical companies will come up with something in our best interests.

yeah, that's the ticket.

"Sorry I can't change the poll from Rhythm to FAM/NFP, but thanks to all for the education. I wasn't really on top of what the proper terms were. My bad.

And crazylady, calling me "dumb" really doesn't do anybody any favors."

Jessica,
I wasn't really calling you dumb, although I can see why you would see it that way. I guess I am wondering what it is about modern culture that means even fabulously hip and educated women would not know about fertility methods other than chemical /invasive ones that put almost all the responsibility on the woman.

And, again, not to be rude to you personally, but why aren't you up on this terminology, and the realities of the methods? Why aren't we all?

If our sex education really is missing this vital, natural component, why?

i always use condoms for birth control / std prevention. but i went on the pill a couple years ago for about 6 months. now, i can't go off of it. i had regular periods before (i started it as an adult) and now i get horrible ovarian cysts and torsion. i hate having to pump my body full of hormones and dealing with all the side effects, but i don't know what to do. i really wish i had never ever tried the pill. it sucks! did going on birth control affect anyone else after they tried to stop taking it? does anyone know if this change is permanent?

"but i went on the pill a couple years ago for about 6 months. now, i can't go off of it. i had regular periods before (i started it as an adult) and now i get horrible ovarian cysts and torsion."

Ouch, that's awful! I mean, I went on the pill to treat symptoms of ovarian cysts - it seems so fucked up to me that some BCPs make the cysts *worse*.

What about VASECTOMY! (For us monogamous heteros) He spends a weekend with a bag of frozen peas in his lap, you spend the rest of your reproductive years not worrying about getting pregnant.

e, I tried a diaphragm once and found that it actually took away any sensation. Don't know if this is common but I thought I'd throw in my 2 cents.

I'm a pill person myself, and haven't really had many problems now except that the generic I take now makes my breasts more tender right before I get my period - but I'd rather that than ever get pregnant. Have thought about other methods but haven't really explored any beyond the diaphragm yet. Asked one doctor about Essure and he acted like it was sooo dangerous, too dangerous to actually discuss with me. *eye roll*

Everyone saying that their abstinence is not by choice--

I'm sure in almost all cases that's not entirely true. Maybe you haven't found the person that you want to be with, but plenty of people hook up with (and even have long-term relationships with) people that they don't think are right for them. So, if you're not having sex at all, you *have* made some kind of decision, for whatever reason. Plenty of tired and cranky people go out to bars on the weekend and get with random others. If you're not doing that, you've made a choice not to.

As it's written in this quiz, I suppose abstinence could apply to anyone who's avoiding the baby-making activities but are otherwise sexually active (unless those would put themselves under none and maybe ignore the heteronormative comment...).

crazylady,

Could you please post some links? Recommend books? In all seriousness, I always thought of myself as pretty aware of what's out there in terms of birth control, STD protection, etc. But I would love to find out if I am missing something. Thanks!

I'm gay, but have been on BC since I was 12 for heavy, crampy periods. I've used the Pill, the Patch , Depo, and now NuvaRing. The ring is like...like god...the Pill, I wasn't into the every day thing. The patch was fine, nothing wrong really, but I liked the Depo idea of not really having to do anything except every three months. Downside was it made my acne worse (I'm 20, it's officially adult acne). NuvaRing though, oh, it is beautiful. If you're using it for periods and not BC, you can go THREE MONTHS without a period. I don't even have any breakthrough. Love, love, love, love, love it. Don't know so much for people using it as BC, but for me, it's amazing.

I thought I'd toss my two cents in since I'm the one who asked the original question.

I currently use the BCP, and a fairly high dose at that. I'm not so thrilled about flooding my body with hormones, so I tried a lower dose for a month and it didn't work out so well. I've though about switching to the NuvaRing (nixed the patch idea once I discovered it was taken off the market), but it's considerably more expensive. A friend has also suggested getting an IUD, but I haven't given it much thought yet. I'll be going over this with a doctor soon...

Also, for those of you or your partners who didn't want to get vasectomies: read about VasClips.

Condoms. And I hate 'em. I'm allergic to latex, so we have to use polyurethane (no way am I using lamb). First of all, they all have that blasted spermicide on them, which I am mildly allergic to. Second, they're expensive, and I like to fuck. Third, there aren't many options. Like two. One is positively dripping in spermicide. The other is too small for my husband. We buy whichever is cheaper.

Hormones make me crazy. IUD gave me the most horrific periods EVER. I can't believe how long I put up with that shit.

If only I could get my hubby to trust the NFP/FAM method...

I posted upthread and haven't had a chance to read all the comments, but I am one of the infertile women who answered the poll. I appreciate the fact that you wish to be sensitive about such matters, and I wish I could find more related to issues of infertility and adoption by/for feminists. Speaking only for myself (cancerversary recently, sorry to derail), I realize that issues of parenting and reproductive freedom (birth control, abortion, healthy sexuality) are extremely important to the conversation and I (so far) have never felt left out/excluded from this conversation simply because I can't get knocked up. I truly think that my infertility has made me all the more aware of the importance of being a feminist and being pro-choice.

Oh, and DUH, I realize that by "sensitive to that," you probably just meant it was inadvertently left off of the poll, not that the poll itself is inherently offensive to those of us whose equipment don't work! :)

Sorry I can't change the poll from Rhythm to FAM/NFP, but thanks to all for the education. I wasn't really on top of what the proper terms were.

I guess I'm not either.

I wouldn't have known what FAM/NFP even meant. Which for the purposes of the poll doesn't matter, I guess, since people who did practice it would know.

I'm aware that there are more effective ways of tracking fertility than simply "counting in your head", but I assumed all of those techniques would be generally described as "Rhythm" methods, since they are concerned with arranging the timing of intercourse with the natural rhythms of the body.

Crazylady, I also wasn't aware that there was some social antipathy toward using the term as a general description of timing intercourse according to fertility, regardless of how fertility is determined. Is this distinction due to a generally skeptical public opinion on the effectiveness of using timed intercourse to avoid pregnancy?

I'm glad I am among 4% of people (more people then use the sponge) who are not having sex! Months ago when my boyfriend and I did have sex we used condoms.

all i have to say is, i miss my NorPlant

i had two. i loved them. sigh

I was incredibly lucky to get my tubes tied at age 25 with no problems whatsoever. I talked to my gyn about it, and it turned out that when she was growing up, she had a good friend who always knew that she didn't want kids. My doctor remembered how difficult it was for that friend to get sterilized, even though she was 100% sure of her decision, so she was sympathetic when I expressed a similar belief. She wanted me to meet with a colleague for a second opinion, just to make sure she wasn't making a mistake, but she had me sign the consent to sterilization before I left that day. A little over a month later, I was sterile, and I couldn't be happier about it.

BCP + condoms.
But it wasn't the use of BCP that screwed up my body... I forgot to have my prescription renewed this month, so I've been off it for a few weeks and my body's been totally fucked. Increased appetite, swollen breasts, fatigue, etc. It seems like I'm so used to the extra hormones that I'm going through extreme withdrawal. Anyone else have this problem?

Well, as far as links/books,
I also recommend "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It is invaluable, for women trying to conceive as well as avoid conception. It can also help you to identify long-term problems of chemical imbalances in the vagina.

The Billings Method of detecting ovulation is a very scientific method. http://www.boma-usa.org/

The Couple to Couple League is religiously based, so not for everyone, but it has a tremendous amount of information and research. They promote a "Sympto-thermal method" which is derived from Billings. It is also very family-oriented, and claims that the methods help couples to grow closer.
http://www.ccli.org/

As far as antipathy toward the term "rhythm method", I just hate it because it is generally treated with derision. It brings to my mind sneering folks who laugh at all the CAtholic babies born to parents using the "rhythm method," which, a few decades ago was really about counting days on a calendar. Of course, that was often a failure mainly due to user error--: people were having intercourse when they knew they were probably fertile! But also because ovulation doesn't follow a calendar.

Ovulation is generally rhythmic, but can change, and does, frequently, from cycle to cycle so it is not completely predictable. Only by learning the (usually very obvious) signs that the body gives for impending fertility, can you keep up on what your body is doing for THAT CYCLE. After tracking it for a long period of time, you can depend more on it remaining the same, but still keep track of what your body is doing every day. And it is not too hard once you get the hang of it.

Using NFP methods is, to me, a gender-empowering act, because it involves my husband in the most full way possible, so that the "effect" of avoiding pregnancy is not always on me. (B/c condoms are NOT happening, and everything else is invasive and/or chemical.)

You also didn't put up Withdrawal as a method, which even Planned Parenthood says when done correctly is a perfectly valid birth control method.

Great poll. I've been on the pill for about six years and it's been great. I take it every morning with my multivitamin and I'm not a forgetful person, so I haven't had any missed-pill scares. And I have to second clapifyoulikeme's appreciative sentiment toward no debilitating periods every month. I know lots of women who are on the pill not for contraception, but just to regulate their cycles, ease the pain of cramps, or ease the pain of endometriosis.

I've been on a generic brand of Seasonale for about the last year and I LOVE having my period only every three months. I'm considering switching to a hormone pill for the whole year (so I can have absolutely no period), but am beginning to wonder, too, how long I want to be on these hormones.

And the pill wasn't even half as serious a libido-killer as prescription anti-depressants. The anti-depressants fuckin' kill my sex drive.

I'm not sure if this counts, but nothing because I don't want to have sex - I think abstinence sort of implies a decision to abstain from something you want. If I was having to have it, it would be condoms - I had to go on the Pill while on skin medication, and the amount of thrush infections (2-3 a month) was horrible.

After having been on the pill (Mercilon) for 8 years, last November I had the Mirena IUD put in, thinking less hormones would be better for me.... the IUD migrated through my uterine wall into the peritoneal cavity where it started hurting. It was not easy to locate, I had to have X-rays and pelvic scans, and to have the IUD removed through laparoscopy in March. I'm back on the pill now (Yasminelle).
:(

Ok so I have a question for those of you allergic to condoms and/or the spermacide. How can you tell? Are the symptoms extreme? I just have found I hate condoms because they seem to just hurt. They have a kind of rough quality to them. Could that indicate a mild allergy or is that universal?

Anyways, I am all about the pill. I didn't think I would, but the hormones do not bother me plus my horrible debilitating cramps and unusually long periods are now gone.

Diaphragm + condoms. I've used a diaphragm since I became sexually active, and haven't had any problems. As for condoms--well, my husband and I are childfree, and are eagerly looking forward to the day we can afford a vasectomy. Even then, however, I still plan on using a diaphragm. Not taking any risks here.

As an aside, I know a young woman who became pregnant while using the pill AND condoms. I still have trouble wrapping my head around that one.

"Could that indicate a mild allergy or is that universal?"

Severity and signs and symptoms of allergy vary. A mild allergy might show up as itching, redness, rash or hives. A very serious allergy might show up as constricted airway or anaphylactic shock and death within minutes (if untreated). The scary thing (of course those in the health field are often exposed to latex, as in gloves, tourniquets or tubing) is a serious reaction may be triggered by a *first time* exposure. Also, those in health field or repeat patients frequently exposed to latex, they may *become* sensitized to latex and exhibit symptoms. I wonder if this is also true for repeat users of condoms or dams. Please see this as well as many sources available for "latex allergy":

http://www.aafp.org/afp/980101ap/980101b.html
http://www.aafp.org/afp/980101ap/reddy.html

Ah, yes. Of course sensitization and resulting allergy and symptoms can result from use of latex condoms. Also note cervical caps and diaphragms, as well as dams, may contain latex:

http://sexuality.about.com/od/contraception/a/condomlatexalle.htm

[start quote]

People can develop an allergic reaction to latex even if they previously have not had such reactions. There are three levels of allergic responses to latex:

1. Mild reactions: include itchiness, dryness, and burning

2. Medium reactions: same response as above, but the reaction will be more severe, last longer, and spread to other parts of the body

3. Severe reactions: includes hives, breathing difficulties, and possibly anaphylactic shock which can be fatal.

[end quote]

Perhaps (1.) or (2.) describes the pain you experience. The solution, of course, is to seek alternatives that do not contain latex. Some specific product recommendations:

http://yourtotalhealth.ivillage.com/allergic-latex-what-are-your-options.html

I dated my ex for four years, three of which we were sexually active (I'm 19). The first year and a half of our sexual activity, we used a combination of the pill and condoms (we were in high school at the time and DID NOT want any scares). We dropped the condoms in 2006 when I went on Depo. Depo made me have a three month long period, made me suicidally depressed, and caused me to gain 15 pounds (7 of which I have lost) I broke up with the boy in January, and the Depo wore off once and for all two weeks ago.

I became sexually active again last month and went on the Nuva Ring. At first we (my "special friend" and I) were using the Nuva ring with condoms, but about two weeks in we stopped using the condoms, which was pretty damned stupid, in retrospect. Now I have to go get tested before I sleep with my coworker next week...boo. I'm not showing any symptoms, but better safe than sorry I suppose.

More on topic though--the ring= awesome, depo=bad, BAD BAD! So far no pregnancy scares on the ring.

"So, if you're not having sex at all, you *have* made some kind of decision, for whatever reason. Plenty of tired and cranky people go out to bars on the weekend and get with random others."

OTOH, I don't know how I could convince a random other to have sex with me even if I did want to do that. :/

I use the pill to reduce the cramping/pain before my period. It also gives me lighter/somewhat shorter periods which is nice. I use it for birth control but since I probably won't be having sex for a while it's okay this way. lol.

Tubal ligation since the ripe old age of 23...

"You also didn't put up Withdrawal as a method, which even Planned Parenthood says when done correctly is a perfectly valid birth control method."

Yikes. I really don't know that I could consider withdrawal a genuine birth control method. The risk of accidental pregnancy is far too high. I mean, I'll be damned if I'd trust any man to pull out in time...and besides that, even if he doesn't ejaculate there's always the chance that he might leak a bit of semen without actually ejaculating.

Condoms.
I tried hormonal birth control, but I have issues with depression and I couldn't find one that didn't plummet me into deep depressions. That, and I had other unsavory side-effects.

My boyfriend and I use condoms. We've gotten very diligent in always wearing them when engaging in sexual activity and checking them afterwards to check for tears. It's worked for us so far!

a combination of the pill, condoms, and the uh.. "withdrawal method".
i may be a little cautious, but oh wellz, i know there wont be any babies.

When I do have sex I use condoms. But right now I'm not having any because I don't have any oppertunity to engage in any sexual activities so I'm technically abstinent but not by choice.

But when I do get back in the game I fully intend to get the patch and the nuva-ring. My gyno said they work well together and I intend to test it. Eventhough I really like the pill I'm terrible at taking anything everyday at the same time.

Hooray for vasectomies!!

And I agree with a previous commenter or two, it should be a separate item in the poll. Big difference between male and female sterilization, really.

"and besides that, even if he doesn't ejaculate there's always the chance that he might leak a bit of semen without actually ejaculating."

Isn't that common when a man's body lubricates while he's aroused?

I love the cervical cap! Why is this so unpopular? I highly recommend it if you're looking for a non-hormonal method and don't need STD protection. I've tried the pill, condoms, the diaphragm, and Fertility Awareness a la Toni Weschler.

My partner loves the cap too - he can't feel it at all. Note that the cap (like the diaphragm) is somewhat less reliable than condoms or the pill. We used condoms during my fertile days until recently when we became less freaked out by the possibility of pregnancy.

Fertility Awareness is AWESOME - I didn't love it as a birth control method (didn't like not being able to have sex during my friskiest time of the month), but it was a great way to learn more about my body. It's really an outrage that we are not all equipped with this information as part of our basic education. Read "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" to learn more.

For those curious, according to Planned Parenthood's website, people who use Fertility Awareness with perfect use have a 1-2 % chance of becoming pregnant in a year (using the temperature/mucus methods). With typical use, it's more like 20%, though in my opinion a lot of that is due to a choice made by users to be risky. Condoms with typical use have a 14% failure rate.

Are you inculding the Mirena as an IUD ?

http://www.ifpa.ie/contraception/ius.html

I've gotta say, Essure worked great for my wife and me. Relatively non-invasive, much less risk of infection or complications than tubal ligation (which is a major surgery, after all) or vasectomy (whoops, cut the wrong thing!), and was covered by a $15 co-pay.
Also, at 28, I couldn't even get a callback from the doc for a vasectomy. Fortunately, we found a good doctor on the Essure site who agreed, no questions asked.

BabyPop, I don't know if you're still reading this thread, but I have to say that I found being on fertility treatments and being a feminist a tremendously isolating experience. There was support available for the infertility side, but a lot of it operated on the assumption that what was bothering me was that I didn't feel like a "real woman" or something, which was...really not the case. What was bothering me was that I wanted something and was having a hard time achieving it. I kept thinking there had to be a feminist perspective on it, but at best I found a lot of silence, and at worst, I found outright hostility (my favorite being the "why don't you just adopt?" from people who are, shall we say, at best skeptical of adoption as an option for a woman facing an unwanted pregnancy). And as sad as I am to say, it's a problem that has persisted into motherhood: finding a good feminist perspective on motherhood that values parenting as hard but rewarding and socially valuable work, and that doesn't define "gender neutral" parenting as "not giving my daughter any of that icky girl stuff" has been really, really hard.

Okay, now I'm just whining, but the bottom line is: while I absolutely understand the emphasis placed on pregnancy prevention, given that those are the rights so often under fire, I did yearn for some feminist community when dealing with infertility.

My gay, gay, gay, hot lesbian, lady-lovin' lifestyle!

"'and besides that, even if he doesn't ejaculate there's always the chance that he might leak a bit of semen without actually ejaculating.'

Isn't that common when a man's body lubricates while he's aroused?"

I think that's only if he hasn't peed since his last ejaculation.

also, in case it hasn't been pointed out, condoms are often referred to internal/external rather than male/female, in order to honor the variety of people who use them..

"I really don't know that I could consider withdrawal a genuine birth control method. The risk of accidental pregnancy is far too high. I mean, I'll be damned if I'd trust any man to pull out in time...and besides that, even if he doesn't ejaculate there's always the chance that he might leak a bit of semen without actually ejaculating."

I know that this is what they taught us when we were teenagers, but it is important to note that if the man is older, and the couple monogamous and really trust each other, this method has a fairly high rate of success as well. It is at least as good as condoms. (With teens and young men, not so successful, because you really do have more of a problem with sperm in pre-ejaculate.)

"It's really an outrage that we are not all equipped with this information as part of our basic education."

I agree totally. This was my source of anger originally.

I used the pill for years, and now my husband and I are using condoms for a couple of months before trying to conceive.

The couple of mentions by pill users that they are able to lubricate naturally off the pill is interesting to me. While on the pill I always had to use a lubricant and I thought it was just me! I never figured it was because of the pill.

Oh I forgot to mention not the b/c method but the std prevention method. We both made a point of getting tested beforehand. I highly recommend that approach if you are doing the whole monogamy thing.

"The whole monogamy thing"... what a can of worms, but I am curious as to how you fabulous feminists approach it? I personally do not have the time or energy to envision a "poly" life, but I am also unable to IM, text message, or answer call-waiting without having a minor tantrum-- just not built for splitting my attention. But then again, in my personal history monogamy has been strictly episodic... Meaning perhaps that not only do I have a limited field of attention, but a limited attention span as well, but I suspect I am not the only one.

I used Alesse starting when I was 17, and it was perfect for two years until I had extreme amounts of pain in my side ALL THE TIME. Doctors and gynos told me there was nothing wrong wtih me, after many vaginal ultrasounds and tests and omg it was just horrible.. So the last option I had was switching birth controls, and since I was running out of options I took it. I was on a few different kinds, but i still had the pain and was getting really sick on my period still (dry heaving, nausea, insane moodswings.)

So I swtiched to Nuvaring a year ago, and the pain stopped! Except now I still get really sick when I have my period, but I figure it's better than being incapacitated on the floor in pain all the time.

It's also great because I don't have to worry about taking pills every day.

Honestly, sterilization would be my *preferred* method of birth control (me or the SO), but until I can manage to get one (hopefully later this year or early next), I rely on the Pill.

It's worked well in the "no babies" category.

But honestly, it has a bit to be desired in a couple of other areas (weight, libido, etc). Hence, the desire to be sterile.

no mention of implants on the survey? we use Implanon and are really happy with it, pretty unpredictable periods but that is the only side effect i have noticed in 8 months and still no babies! we double up with condoms too until we can find a doctor to give a 27 year old a vasectomy.

The NUVA RING!

I absolutely love it! I have been on it for about 3.5 years and plan to for many years to come. (I'm 23). It is so easy to use and you don't have to worry about it on an everyday basis like the pill. I am VERY forgetful with pills, so good thing I'm not on the pill. haha. But, me and my fiance also use condoms randomly. I got like 30 condoms from Planned Parenthood and they're still sitting there.

To start, I have my tubes tied. Yes, at the age of 24, two months ago tomorrow! Also, about three weeks before that, I found out I was likely infertile due to a medical condition (itty-bitty brain tumour). I also use condoms from time to time now, just for clean-up's sake when having heterosex. (Polyamorous.)

Before that, I used the Pill and condoms. I had zero trouble with the Pill, though coming off it has been strange. And, I suppose the tumour also counts.

When the doctor broke the news about the tiny, benign tumour, she told me that I was likely not able to conceive without assistance. She said "Normally, we offer counseling at this point, but as you're getting your tubes tied in a few weeks...congratulations?"

Withdrawal really should have been mentioned. I've been sexually active for over 10 years now and have used the withdrawal method for the majority of the time in my long term monogamous relationships. It's true that a lot of responsibility is placed on the man, but what's wrong with that? Unless you are sleeping with a jerk you don't trust, or if you know the guy doesn't have much control, the withdrawal method is effective. And it actually takes both partners to cooperate, because sometimes the woman is the one that needs to "move" so that he can ejaculate. Depends on the position you are in. So, it takes lots of trust and knowing each other's bodies.

Why is it so surprising that so many women are using BCP? I am confused by that remark. What I am surprised about is that so many on here use an IUD.

I'll cosign on that post that said they weren't getting any, but I've been celibate for nearing on two years now, I know, just kill me now. Anyway, I am on the pill (ortho-cyclen) and when I am sexually active I still require the use of a condom and other stuff as needed.

I have been on some type of BCP since I was 15 (now 30) and I have never had a lubrication issue so I thought those comments were interesting, everyones experience with hormone drugs is different. I initially went on the pill because I had a heavy period and it was so heavy and painful I didn't want to go to school. Now my period is regulated, it lasts half as long and cramps aren't oh so bad now. I don't give much thought to the hormones in the BCP though - am I a complete doofus?

About the tubal ligations - single ladies aside - why would you want a tubal ligation if you were in a committed relationship? Wouldn't you rather your SO get a vasectomy? Tubal ligations are incredibly invasive and ridiculously expensive - as an elected procedure I don't see how it could be covered by insurance. Why would they want to go through all that? It just doesn't seem like a good idea for someone who is already in a relationship to have one. The benefits do not outweigh the costs in comparison with a vasectomy. When I read that a woman in a relationship would rather have a tubal than her SO have a vasectomy it really makes me wonder. Of course, it aint my business and wtf do I know, but I can still wonder.

I use Seasonal pills. Which I'm surprised to not hear that more people are using it. I love it. It has gotten rid of all symptoms of my endometriosis and having few periods is great. I've been on different kinds of pills for about eight years now to treat the endo and seasonal has worked the best for me. I had some issues with a different kind of bcp but I've been on the Seasonal for at least two years now and haven't had any problems.

Also, thanks to those of you who mentioned Essure. I had never heard of it and I just looked at the website and it seems really interesting and something I'm going to have to look into more as I don't want kids.

I use Seasonal pills. Which I'm surprised to not hear that more people are using it. I love it. It has gotten rid of all symptoms of my endometriosis and having few periods is great. I've been on different kinds of pills for about eight years now to treat the endo and seasonal has worked the best for me. I had some issues with a different kind of bcp but I've been on the Seasonal for at least two years now and haven't had any problems.

Also, thanks to those of you who mentioned Essure. I had never heard of it and I just looked at the website and it seems really interesting and something I'm going to have to look into more as I don't want kids.

I agree with allegra, BC has nothing on anti-depressants when it comes to killing libido...orgasms? Forget it.

BeccaTheCyborg -- what a great doctor! haha

I had been on different forms of BCP for about 6 years - I started on the tricyclical ones (because of really bad periods and suicidal "PMS"), but I couldn't handle the hormones changes, so I went to a straight dose. Eventually I tried Seasonale, which is only 3 periods a year...then I discovered the joys of skipping the placebos and didn't have my period for a while. I did like it, though I would occasionally forget to take it. Recently, I got a Mirena put in because I was going to be losing my insurance (which covered it 100% -- woohoo!). It hurt like nobody's business when I got it put in, and I had pretty severe cramps afterwards, but about a month and a half later I only have slight tenderness every once and a while. I actually forget I have it! And the forgetting doesn't = maybe baby. I love the IUD. Love!

I worked at Planned Parenthood for about a year, in the distribution area, and within the past 6 months or so, the increase in number of Mirenas (and Paraguards, but most noticeably Mirenas) that we sent to clinics was HUGE. Pills are still the most popular by far, but an increasing number of people seem to be using IUDs.
Also, I have heard a lot of horror stories about Depo -- one of my friends got her period every other week for the whole time she was on it. Lots of mood swings. Etc. Personally, I wouldn't trust the studies about it that Pfizer (the original manufacturer) did saying it didn't have a lot of side effects -- but, I tend to not trust "big pharm" anyway. I digress...

I'd be interested in tracking my cycles but wouldn't trust it enough to not get pregnant. And I hate condoms. I'm dry enough as it is from the anti-depressants, condoms tend to make it even worse. By boy and I don't use them anymore.

Love this post! People's thoughts on BC are so interesting.

I'm among the ones trying to get pregs, so in a way, the rhythm method is controlling when I conceive.

Chiming in here with the IUD love! I'm still spotting pretty much constantly, but it's tapering off, and I'll have regular periods soon. I went with Paraguard b/c I have some sort of synthetic estrogen sensitivity or something. I developed vulvodynia when I was taking BC pills, and it has nearly completely disappeared within 12 weeks of ceasing the pill.

Enhancedvibes: Much as I appreciate the implication that all tube-tied ladies with partners are sleeping around, I personally love the idea of having it be my own body to that I have control over. It just feels too much like relying on someone else, though The Mate has offered to get the snip too. Besides, we're in Canada, where it's all covered anyway. ;)

As far as how horrible and invasive it is, I've had worse colds in terms of recovery, and two scars that are barely visible.

WTF do you know indeed.

Condoms and spermicide.

When I started having heterosex at 18, I went on the pill and stayed on it for a year. My libido took a crazy nose-dive (I was formerly the horniest person most of my friends had ever met) and I developed vulvodynia and dyspareunia. So I have been off of it for almost two years now but my sex drive and pain have yet to improve :(. On the other hand, I lost all the weight, sluggishness, and screaming fits that accompanied the pill for me.

Thus it's condoms and spermicide for me. I recently learned about the use of wild carrot as an herbal birth control method and plan on starting using that soon. I will use it along with condoms, as my fiance always, always, always wears a condom.

Oh, by the way, we use Crown condoms and they are so amazing! I live in Portland, Maine and there is an awesome condom store here that stocks all kinds of brands that most places don't carry. Apparently Trojan uses industrial grade latex, thus the awful smell and thickness. But Crowns and other Japanese brands are much thinner and stronger, without much smell at all. I highly recommend them to anyone in the market for good condoms. You can buy them on Amazon for 1.99 for a twelve pack.

Gingerakimbo, my pain isn't completely gone; occasionally I'll have a time when I get sore for no reason at all, but even then, it's like 10% of the pain I was experiencing with sex and tampons before. Before I stopped the BC, my doctor had me work up to 75 mg of Elavil, and then slowly come off of it when I said I wanted to try stopping hormones to see if that might be the root of my problem. It's possible that the Elavil helped to accelerate my healing, and it might be worth considering if you haven't had improvement after 2 years off of the BC. Don't give up! My body is still very slowly normalizing (my face is just a mess, and my libido hasn't completely returned, nor do I naturally lubricate the way I did before the BC, but it's getting better), and I'm hoping that a year from now, I'll be completely back to how I was before. And that maybe I'll be able to afford some serious dermatological treatment for the way my face was ravaged. :-)

My thoughts are with you!

Enhancedvibes, my reason for getting a tubal rather than having my partner get a vasectomy is similar to that of Beccathecyborg. I have a pretty intense aversion to childbirth and pregnancy, and having my tubes tied eases my mind way more than any other method I can imagine would. Also, I'm much more committed to being childfree than my partner is, and if anything happens and we break up down the road, it'd be awful for him to have gotten sterilized for me.

I'm in the US, and my insurance covered the entire procedure. I paid the $10 copay for the office visits for the consultations beforehand, but the entire procedure, doctors' fees, drugs, hospital time...all of that was covered. I suspect that it's because it's a lot cheaper to cover my tubal ligation now than it is to cover the kids I'd potentially have if they denied me the tubal coverage. The procedure was not a big deal, and well worth the peace of mind I now have.

Can anyone give me any information on having an IUD (non-hormonal) without having ever been pregnant? I have been told by my doctor and multiple others that the uterus is more likely to reject the IUD if it has never been stretched from a pregnancy. But I love the idea of the ease and effectiveness of the IUD and would like to have one! Also, does American insurance usually cover the costs of IUD insertion?

Until then, I am a condoms and spermicide girl. I really like vaginal contraception film which isn't gooey and is really easy to put in.

"Enhancedvibes: Much as I appreciate the implication that all tube-tied ladies with partners are sleeping around,"

beccathecyborg - uhh, just ftr, i never implied any such thing, my comments only focused on women with a SO who want a tubal ligation because its so much easier for the man to get the snip snip than a woman to have her tubes tied, i never commented on them sleeping around (?!?!)-- personally, i cannot imagine how it could be better for a woman with a SO to have a tubal ligation vs. the man getting a vasectomy, it just doesnt make sense to me - we can agree to disagree on this, im ok with that

apophenia - i am glad that your insurance covered your procedure and i understand your position, better safe than sorry - that brings to mind that my BCP is not covered by my United Healthcare (though the cost is reduced) - i wonder if a tubal would be covered -- insurance is so screwy that way

"personally, i cannot imagine how it could be better for a woman with a SO to have a tubal ligation vs. the man getting a vasectomy, it just doesnt make sense to me"

I've heard of a few women preferring to get tubals because if she's ever raped by another guy who is fertile, her tubal ligation will protect her from unwanted conception more than her SO's vasectomy will.

"personally, i cannot imagine how it could be better for a woman with a SO to have a tubal ligation vs. the man getting a vasectomy, it just doesnt make sense to me"

It is a more complicated surgery, to be sure. But it is the only way a woman knows for certain that *she* won't get pregnant. Vasectomies only work as long as you are only with the person that got one; and no matter how committed your relationship may be, stuff happens: people grow apart, divorce, cheat, die...

I love this post, and just read several of the comments to my feminist male housemate as we talked about these issues.

As for myself, I have used the pill, the patch, and condoms, and I'm currently using condoms and what I'd call Introductory Fertility Awareness (aka what I learned in my Women's Studies class "Body Politics" in college - best class EVER). I will definitely be tracking down the Weschler book to bone up on my background, however.

I'm surprised by a couple of things here - the number of women using BC even despite bad experiences (I used it for a year, got off, and will never go back on), and how few women use diaphragms. I thought they'd be more popular.

I was also surprised by how few women want kids in this comment thread - sometimes I feel like I'm the only woman I know in this situation (I'm 25), and I wish I could reach out and talk to you all about it. Can we get some kind of future poll or post or discussion about this in the future? I think it's fascinating.

Does anyone know if there's some kind of clearinghouse or website that tracks reasonable doctors willing to do vasectomies or tubal ligations for people in their twenties? I feel jealous of the women who have found them...and bet a lot of women would be happy to have access to that information.

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=167549&title=erin-jackson-birth-control

ugh and on that note, this is DISGUSTING - http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=167555&title=rob-oreilly-stds-wooo

Does anyone on this thread use Implanon? I've been thinking about it, but the description of what it will do to your periods is both vague and scary. What have other people's experiences been with it?

I used FAM for the first 4 years I was married. I LOVE "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It worked so well that my very non-feminist mom pulled me aside one day, and suggested that I might be infertile, and should get checked out. (Nice, my birth control method is working, so there must be something wrong with me.) I had serious problems with almost every other form of birth control. Now that we have two kids, my husband is getting a vasectomy. (Nuvaring was the WORST. It gave me a raging yeast infection, and the only yeast infection I've ever had.) Even though I love FAM, I find it infuriating when people use that as an excuse not to have other, medical birth control. Having practiced it, I know that fertility awareness takes work, and a very open honest, and respectful relationship.

I used FAM for the first 4 years I was married. I LOVE "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It worked so well that my very non-feminist mom pulled me aside one day, and suggested that I might be infertile, and should get checked out. (Nice, my birth control method is working, so there must be something wrong with me.) I had serious problems with almost every other form of birth control. Now that we have two kids, my husband is getting a vasectomy. (Nuvaring was the WORST. It gave me a raging yeast infection, and the only yeast infection I've ever had.) Even though I love FAM, I find it infuriating when people use that as an excuse not to have other, medical birth control. Having practiced it, I know that fertility awareness takes work, and a very open, honest, and respectful relationship.

sorry @ previous double post. I wanted to make it clear that I meant, FAM is no reason not to have other methods AVAILABLE.

Speaking of birth control issues, I could use some help. I just moved to a bigger city (Detroit area, to be specific) and I have absolutely no idea how to go about finding an OBGYN that I can trust. Are there any feminist websites that have recommendations for cities and such? I want to find a practitioner I can identify with and trust, because I'm having some IUD issues and I'm very concerned.

So to answer this post, I used the pill years ago, then depo, then the patch, and now the IUD. I've been dissatisfied with all of them. I might just use condoms, although I don't want to do that because A: I'm allergic to latex and Polyeurethane is expensive and B: I'm mildly allergic to polyeurethane as well, I think. I'm also mildly irritated by semen however (my vagina hates sex, apparently, although I most definitely do not). So I need to have a talk with someone who is going to sit down and take the time to discuss these issues with me, rather than rush me through because they've got so many people to help.

Thanks, for anyone that may have an answer.

Speaking of birth control issues, I could use some help. I just moved to a bigger city (Detroit area, to be specific) and I have absolutely no idea how to go about finding an OBGYN that I can trust. Are there any feminist websites that have recommendations for cities and such? I want to find a practitioner I can identify with and trust, because I'm having some IUD issues and I'm very concerned.

So to answer this post, I used the pill years ago, then depo, then the patch, and now the IUD. I've been dissatisfied with all of them. I might just use condoms, although I don't want to do that because A: I'm allergic to latex and Polyeurethane is expensive and B: I'm mildly allergic to polyeurethane as well, I think. I'm also mildly irritated by semen however (my vagina hates sex, apparently, although I most definitely do not). So I need to have a talk with someone who is going to sit down and take the time to discuss these issues with me, rather than rush me through because they've got so many people to help.

Thanks, for anyone that may have an answer.

Sara -
I have been on Implanon for about 10 months. My doctor and the doctor who implanted it (mine hadnt gone through the training yet) were both very generous about information. Apparently a lot of women don't like the side effects and come back after a month to have it taken out. They made sure I had done my research and really wanted it. Talk to your doctor and read up about it online.

As far as my experience, the only side effect has been unpredictable periods. The doctors warned me that the first 3-6 months would be really irregular and the periods could be quite long but then after 6 months most women regulate and many have no periods at all. My doctor asked me to make an informal committment to make it through the first 6 months before asking her to take it out and I told her I was willing to see it through.

The only time I was really frustrated with it was when I had 1 (albeit light) period for 3 weeks which seemed to run into the next cycle so I had about 4 days off and then started up again for another week and a half. Other than that, I have been pretty regular with some intermittent spotting in the first 4 months.

Personally I love the Implant. It is supposed to be the most effective method on the market and I love that it is good for 3 years, just in case something should happen to my insurance coverage. I have experienced NO side effects whatsoever besides the irregular cycles and since starting my once mind-numbing cramps and very heavy periods are a thing of the past. I should say that my doctor said that all women experience different side effects but she did say that if you have been on progestin-only BC in the past it should have similar but milder side effects (because it is a smaller dose). Hope that helps, good luck with the decision!

also Sara, i can't help but love this statistic (from wikipedia):

"Failure rate for Implanon was reported at 0.1%...In comparison, surgical sterilization has a failure rate of 0.2%"