Actually, I use a combination of three. First and foremost, I'm on the pill. Next, we use a kind of rhythm method where we use condoms on the days around where if I was ovulating, I would be at increased risk of pregnancy.

No babies for me!

I'm currently practicing abstinence. By practicing, I mean that I can't seem to get laid. Also, laziness seems to be a factor in this abstinence phase. Hooray for losers! :)

You could put a (male or female) next to "Sterilization" too, like you have next to "Condoms". Small point; I mention because my partner and I use vasectomy, and I hesitated to click sterilization because for all I know that might be inaccurately counted as tubal ligation.

My husband has had not one, but two vasectomies, and the freedom is great! However, when we still wanted maintain our fertility together, I used a diaphragm, which I liked a lot--no hormones, no risk, worked great (I got pregnant the first month I stopped using it).

My husband and I use condoms only. I used the pill for a few years, but forgot doses all the time which negated the point. I also hated the side effects (I like lubricating naturally, thanks) and hated the idea of pumping my body with hormone for years on end. So I told my husband if we didn't want another child we'd have to get really good with the condoms instead. And we did.

Condoms work. Somebody tell the world!

SKM, good catch. Unfortunately, I don't think I can edit it now that it's up...but you're right of course.

Me, after a couple of months of being in love with the NuvaRing, it started making me a heinous bitch. Now I'm a condoms gal!

Sterilization by way of cancer treatment, I suppose. :(

When I still had my organ, though, the condom & the pill.

sgzax has it right -- we're big condom fans. My wife didn't like the hormones, and condoms make the best sense.

And yeah, not all condoms are vegan (milk protein rears its ugly head) Check out sensualvegan.com!

LESBIANISM!!!!

Condoms for me until timing is right for that second kid (probably soon). After second kid is safely born, I'm gettin' me a vasectomy. Not 100%, I know, but good enough for me. Wouldn't be heartbroken to have a third, just don't want to plan on having a third.

@ bunny:

Me, too! Most effective bc w/sex ever, without any side effects!

same as ellestar--I've gotten good at taking the pills, but we still use condoms in the middle of my cycle. In fact, because we're both worriers when it comes to the possibility of pregnancy, we usually use condoms every time unless it's the couple days before or after my period.

I have used the NuvaRing for about 6 years. While I know some ladies who have had some issues with it, I love it. I only deal with it once a month and it's super easy to skip my cycle when I want to. And, of course, when I am seeing someone recreationally, I use condoms as well.

I have forgotten to mention it once or twice with a new partner, which for me was more humorous than problematic. But I can see how it might be a bit awkward for some.

BCP for me. I miss Alesse (I moved to England where I guess it doesn't exist) and they've put me on one called Ovranette. Oh how I love NHS sexual health (drop-in) clinics and the pill for free!

Toughie. For now I've been abstaining for life. But I realized I no longer have moral reasons to abstain but before I was ready I went on exchange. But I'm on the pill for other reasons and I would use a condom too.
Question: does anyone have an idea about how much the effectiveness of the pill goes down if you miss one day a month?

I have used the NuvaRing for about 6 years. While I know some ladies who have had some issues with it, I love it. I only deal with it once a month and it's super easy to skip my cycle when I want to. And, of course, when I am seeing someone recreationally, I use condoms as well.

I have forgotten to mention it once or twice with a new partner, which for me was more humorous than problematic. But I can see how it might be a bit awkward for some.

what about preferred method of STD protection? babies aren't the only thing that could come out of heterosexual sex. and STDs are a concern for all sexualities..

I have an implant (Implanon), which is great. Highly recommended.

Just a note.. the rhythm method and natural family planning aren't really the same thing.

I'm glad to see people talking about this topic, because I'm having an awful time with contraceptives right now.

After being on the pill since I was 16 (I'm now 24), I got off a year ago, and have been using condoms with my (same, monogamous) partner ever since. Since I had been on the pill since still undergoing puberty, I had never actually experienced my natural, settled, post-adolescent hormonal state before - it was like meeting myself for the first time! I felt so much saner and at home in my body off hormones, plus my libido returned and I am able to lubricate naturally (as sgzax mentioned above).

But recently, my S.O. developed a latex allergy, and non-latex condoms are either cheap and really baggy/uncomfortable/unreliable or expensive as sh*t (we were getting the regular ones for free from the health center where he works). Also, I have acne for the first time in my life - ugh! I'm looking for a reliable, pleasant, minimally-invasive, un-hormonal contraceptive - and I feel like there's no perfect choice for me. :(

Homosexuality. I'm looking into getting a t-shirt made that says "Prevent abortions: become a homosexual."

And to protect against STDs with penetrative toys, I use condoms.

I'm kinda non-monogamous (and possibly kinda slutty), so I like condoms.

The Pill. I've been on it since I was 18 (25 now) and it works for me. I also use condoms when I'm not in a relationship. And anytime I miss a pill or am taking antibiotics. I know too many women who have a kid because antibiotics lessened the effectiveness of the Pill.

I hate to be the angry poster, but the rhythm method, Fertility Awareness Method, and Natural Family Planning are not the same thing at all.

FAM looks at every cycle individually, and therefore you're never guessing when you're fertile like you would with the rhythm method.

What's great about FAM is that it makes you aware of you and your partner's combined fertility -- and doesn't suppress your fertility for the entire month. Personally, I like the fact that my body's hormones can return to normal after a year on the pill. (Not that the pill kills babies, and that it's not a good option for other women, but I didn't like it for me.)

Toni Weschler's Take Charge of Your Fertility is the BEST book for this birth control method, if anyone is interested.

I had to start taking birth control before I was even sexually active, which sucked. I was having insane periods that were actually causing me to become anemic, so they put me on the Pill. Since I can't do the scheduled pill-taking thing very well I soon switched to the Patch, and was on that for about 3 years. Then I discovered that the patch actually had far higher levels of estrogen than was originally thought, and heard the horror stories about women stroking out and/or dying....yeah, I switched to the NuvaRing right away (And my breasts went from a C cup to B cup in about two weeks, if that gives you any idea of how high the estrogen dose in that thing was).

I generally like the NuvaRing. It's not perfect, but it's definitely the best option for me.

lyndorr,

i asked my doctor about what would happen if i miss a day and she told me just to double up on the next day an i'd be fine. sorry i don't have any real numbers but i hope that helps.

also, FWIW, i almost never take my pill at the same time everyday and me and my SO have a lot of sex and i've still been baby free. (i'm not reccomending that people shouldnt follow directions i just don't want anyone to be super scared if they don't/can't for some reason)

it depends on which me you're asking.

me with my sweetie, a vasectomy.

me with other lovers, a condom. i too was surprised at the ignoring of stds.

me with my first husband, with whom i was monogamous, natural family planning, which as another mentioned, is not at all the same as the rhythm method. it worked for us for the 8 or so years we used it once i came across the concept.

@ ivoryalleykat:
I have a friend who had similar struggles with BC: the pill variety was not an option (don't recall why--maybe estrogen-sensitivity) and she is allergic to latex. Her solution was a low-dose hormone non-estrogen method. Possibly an IUD like Mirena.

You should talk to your gyno about missing a pill and how it effects your bcp effectiveness. There also might be info that comes with your pill pack.

Missing a pill has different results on the pills effectiveness depending on when in the month you missed it.

Interesting question. I currently use BCP, but I wouldn't call it my preferred method of birth control. It's more like my preferred method of acne control and period predictor, with a side effect of birth control. I would actually prefer to use something non-hormonal, ideally FAM (psst--is "Rhythm Method" really the best option to include here?). At this point in my life, though, I'm too disorganized and see my boyfriend too rarely to pin my hopes on something like that.

Wait, you don't have "douching with Coke while standing upside down after your first time" in the list... ?!

:p

lyndorr,

i asked my doctor about what would happen if i miss a day and she told me just to double up on the next day an i'd be fine. sorry i don't have any real numbers but i hope that helps.

also, FWIW, i almost never take my pill at the same time everyday and me and my SO have a lot of sex and i've still been baby free. (i'm not reccomending that people shouldnt follow directions i just don't want anyone to be super scared if they don't/can't for some reason)

I so agree that Toni Weschler's Take Charge of Your Fertility is the best book ever. I used to be on the Pill and use condoms; Then after being on the pill for a decade and I was only 25 my doctor recommended that I give my body a break; So for the last four years my husband and I practice the fertility awareness method; I can’t believe how well it works for me, I feel like for the first time in my life I understand what is going on with my body;

4 months before we got married, my husband got a vasectomy.....now I can't even remember what it was like to think about protection before sex.

so yeah, the vasectomy thing worked out really well for us :)

Another request to change 'rhythm method' to FAM or NFP. The Rhythm method does not work to prevent pregancy. FAM/NFP does.

IUD + a condom = megaprotection! :)

I tried the Pill and had terrible side effects so I relied on condoms for about 10 years (and never had a problem). I tried to get sterilized (using Essure) and while preparing for that I was diagnosed with endometrial hyperplasia. The treatment I decided on is a Mirena IUD, which I've had for about three months now and love. It relieves my hyperplasia and works as birth control so I'm totally covered. I'm childfree, and will always be a little scared of getting unintentionally pregnant until the day I can get sterilized, but the Mirena has great numbers in terms of how well it works and since it's treating the hyperplasia I can take the trade off of a little bit of nerves about getting pregnant vs. crazy-heavy, painful periods. I still want to be sterilized though, and that may be an option for me in the future.

As far as STDs, I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years, we're monogamous (and have had STD tests) so no worries there.

I love the idea about homosexuality preventing abortions t-shirt!

I am on Implanon.

After a brief period of emotional rollercoastering, it's all settled and I feel completely normal, minus painful cramping and inconvenient bleeding.

Free on the NHS, too.

YES, condoms work all the time. I feel like people don't know this! I am fortunate to have short, light, regular periods and wouldn't want to mess with that by going on the pill. Also, I cannot afford for my boobs to get any bigger!

But I guess there are also differet factors for married women and people like me, who don't always know where that thing's been...

Yasmin! Currently, condoms too because I am on an antibiotic.

I hear a lot of women talk about Pill side effects, and just thought I'd mention that Yasmin has virtually no side effects for me. I found it after trying several other Pills that made me miserable. The only side effect seems to be an extremely short period and clearer skin!

Also, mestiza is right: missing one Pill makes no difference as long as you take it as soon as you remember, even if that means taking two in one day! Only after missing two or more pills do you need to make sure to use condoms.

I always used condoms every time and it works, but since entering a very committed relationship (and both of us are std free) Id have to say my favorite is Yaz sometimes combined with a spermicide.

Condoms and the NuvaRing - we're both paranoid about babies.

Currently: Spermicide-coated condoms for the occasional hook-up.

In past relationship: The Pill + spermicide condoms.

I have also used EC, once, after a condom broke.

I want to get sterilized because I never ever want children... but apparently I'm too young to make that decision. I'm not too young to have a baby, but I'm too young to decide I never want kids (24). Go figure.

Prayer? I love Depo, but it stripped my teeth of calcium, so Im back on the pill.

Another double-method person; pill -- Seasonale!!! -- and (usually) condoms.

My husband wants to get a vasectomy at some point (he's 26, so good luck getting someone to do it), but even then I doubt that I'll go off of my precious pill. I don't think that I could go back to having more periods, especially since each one would be a hell of a lot more painful than they are now.

We use sterilization in the form of vasectomy and I couldn't be happier. Before the vasectomy I tried for years to have a tubal ligation done, but after searching in 3 states I found no one who would perform the procedure until after I had either turned 30 years of age or given birth to a child. Evidently a woman is never too young to be a mother, but she may be too young to decide not to be one. ?!?!?!

ivoryalleykat, there are polyurethane condoms out there that are just as sturdy and reliable as latex condoms. I believe both Durex and Trojan each do a polyurethane condom.

Currently: Spermicide-coated condoms for the occasional hook-up.

In past relationship: The Pill + spermicide condoms.

I have also used EC, once, after a condom broke.

I want to get sterilized because I never ever want children... but apparently I'm too young to make that decision. I'm not too young to have a baby, but I'm too young to decide I never want kids (24). Go figure.

condoms. natural lamb ones.

expensive? not more than renting a dvd, far less than going out to movie.

much better texture and lubrication than any synthetic ones. (rubber just has a tacky, friction-y feel we don't like).

no std protection, so only for committed clean couples.

much better than pill, which made things really weird--no libido, odd paranoias, phobias, etc.

and they have worked well for years now, i.e. no preggers.

Seconded L-K. I seem to have lapsed into prolonged abstinence since my last relationship ended, primarily due to laziness. But I'm still on the Pill anyway, just in case I get lucky. :)

(Really, it'd be the Pill plus condoms. STDs are balls, I learned that the hard way.)

Does anyone find the pill makes them slightly crazy, emotion-wise? I've been on it for over a year now, so I can't honestly really remember what I was like before. Im starting to think maybe I'm just blaming perfectly natural crazy on the pill, because it's easier to say to people 'Don't mind my emotional craziness, I'm on the pill!' rather than 'The world makes me sad!!!'

I'm on the pill, but I also use condoms. And dental dams. And finger cots.

I figure the pill can take care of my birth control needs, and the rest can help protect against STDs.

I'm currently practicing abstinence. By practicing, I mean that I can't seem to get laid.

Same here!

I'm surprised that so many people use the pill. I used it off and on for about 7 years before switching to an IUD (with a couple of stints w/ the Nuvaring and the patch in between) and I can't believe how awful it made me feel and how long I tolerated it. I know that with any method, YMMV, but so many women put up with pretty awful side effects when there are much better (and equally effective) alternatives out there that so many people don't explore. Too bad our nation's version of sex education is "Don't do it."

Condoms. I really don’t like them, but they seem like the only reliable, non-permanent birth control available to a man (I am not ready to trust anyone else with this responsibility, yet). I certainly do appreciate when my partner uses something as well, though.

PS – I realize now that abstinence would be another method available to me, but that doesn’t sound fun at all.

I am not an angry poster....just...REALYL frustrated.

Why is a super-hot feminist website like this so unbelievably dumb as to put "rhythm method", which almost nobody uses (counting quickly in your head just before sex notwithstanding ;)... and leave out all of the other, actually USEFUL and PROVEN natural methods of fertility awareness?

How in control of our bodies are we?

So, I am abstinent and I've never been sexually active but it's not my 'birth control'. I mean, it is technically, because obviously I won't be getting pregnant anytime soon but that's merely a side effect. When I do choose to have sex (which will be when I want to, I'm not waiting for Jesus' OK or anything) I will use active birth control, which makes this thread a handy, informal, unscientific learning tool. So thanks.

Personally, the pill isn't birth control. I started the pill because my cycle was completely out. of. control. It was from my first period at age 11. And it only got worse with stress. After 3 periods in less than a 6 week time frame, I realized through the miracle of chemistry I didn't have to live for 24 hours in the fetal position every time I had one of my grossly unpredictable periods. So it's really not birth control for me. I use it so I can function. And yes, I've tried going off of it and trying other things, and my body promptly returned to it's irregular schedule. My doc says having a kid would help "regulate" my hormones, but I'm not ready for that, thanks.

So for actual birth control, I use condoms.

I want to add kudos to the Toni Weschler book. My husband and I use FAM, limiting intercourse without condoms to the post-ovulatory time. It's gratifying to learn to listen to your body. My sister has been on bcp's for years, and has experienced all sorts of side effects, changing brands from year to year. I've tried to convince her to give her body a break. sigh.

I'm on the pill, but I also use condoms. And dental dams. And finger cots.

I lost count of the number of straight people I've spoken with who have never heard of dental dams. Straight people can use them too! Yes, in the kind of conversations I have "dental dam" comes up a lot.

Yaz changed my life. It's the only BC that doesn't make me feel...off.

And of course, not having a boy to have sex with certainly helps the controlling of birth.

The pill made me batshit insane. I was constantly going back and forth between throwing tantrums at people and crying hysterically, so I swore off hormones.

Then I tried using a diaphragm, but the spermicide irritated my vagina AND it gave me BV.

I was thinking about a copper IUD, but I'm concerned that might give me BV too (I have the pickiest cooter in the world). Plus, I like my short, light periods.

Pregnant on the Pill.
Pregnant on the Ring.
Pregnant on the Patch.
IUD made me crazy.
My hilarious 8 year old is very good birth control in and of himself. We also like condoms too.

Sorry I can't change the poll from Rhythm to FAM/NFP, but thanks to all for the education. I wasn't really on top of what the proper terms were. My bad.

And crazylady, calling me "dumb" really doesn't do anybody any favors.

What if I'm just too blasted cranky and tired for any type of romantic relationship? Can we put an "unintended" in front of abstinence?

I'm a pill and condom sort of girl. I don't trust that I use either method perfectly, despite my best efforts, and I rather don't want to get pregnant, so...two methods at all times for this girl.

After years of bcp and a brief stint with the nuva ring, my partner and I decided to settle on condoms. The nuva-ring was great until I began having anxiety attacks that were waking me up at night. The pill's side effects such as constipation, vaginal dryness and lack of libido took the fun out of sex. Since going off the pill I lost 10 pounds, I sleep soundly at night, I exercise more, my breasts went from a D to a C cup and I'm feeling 100% better overall.

I hadn't used condoms regularly for about 10 years when we started using them. Is it my imagination or have they improved? We've been using the Electra kind.

Also, my partner is considering getting a vasectomy but we're waiting for better insurance to kick in, etc. I've had zero luck trying to get sterilized and I'm 33.

For now, condoms are the best and healthiest choice for us.

FYI for anyone using spermicide - they actually may increase your risk of contracting an STI by irritating the vaginal tissue.

I use the pill and condoms. I haven't experienced any noticeable side effects from the pill and overall it's been a pretty positive and effective method for me.

I love my IUD. I had never even considered one before my midwife suggested it, and I had heard all the scary stories from the 1970s, but they are much improved since then. I literally never have to think about it, it's as effective as sterilization, and the only side effect is slightly heavier periods, which are get better the longer I have it.

I have a non-hormonal Paraguard. I didn't want any hormones, even from low-dose pills or Mirena, while I was breastfeeding, and after five years on the Pill before pregnancy, I wanted to give my body a break, like some of the other posters said. Insurance didn't cover it, and it cost $500. But with the co-pays I used to have with the pill, it paid for itself in two years.

I've heard that sometimes women who have never had children have more problems with them, but I think women who don't want kids for sure, can't get sterilized because they're too young and don't like the idea of being on artificial hormones for 30 years should definitely look into it.

re: wednesday and jele

Your comments about not being able to get sterilized due to young age is so disheartening to me.
I have no interest in having kids, and have often thought how much simpler it would be to be sterilized, but doubted that any doctor would sterilize a 20 year old woman. I have yet to actually investigate, but it sucks to hear that my fears are true, at least for some doctors. Women are treated like children, we don't know what we really want.

It's interesting (and unsurprising) that it is acceptable for men to want to be sterilized, but women! 'oh no no, but that's an essential part of womanhood! It's instinctual, to want to be a mother. You'll change your mind when your older.'

Rgh. So, for me, condoms. I have no interest in disrupting my body with hormones. Though I'm thinking about switching to a diaphragm. Anyone use one? Thoughts?

I couldn't see the link for "see results" till I voted, so in case anyone else is missing it:

http://www.micropoll.com/akira/mpresult/422038-88045

Sodomy works for me.

I love Nuva Ring. I had to put it in bold. It's awesome. Also, Depo made me psychotic, plus 60 pounds.

Attn animeredith:

Whoa! I had the same thing (boob shrinkage) happen when I switched to Nuva. Not that Nuva shrunk my boobs, but that I'd been on a high-hormone method (evil Depo) for so many years that my boobs were way bigger.

But going back to how Depo is evil --

I was on Depo for 3 1/2 years, and I loved it for a long time. (Whoo for 4 times a year b.c.) I knew I gained A LOT of weight, but I never made the assocation, not wanting to place blame where I thought I was at fault. Then in the last year I was on it, I became SO angry. I would absolutely snap and have violent urges. Then came paranoia like nobody's business. One night when my significant other was working on his thesis, I convinced myself somehow that he was cheating on me and had been for a long time (with absolutely no evidence), and sobbed all ngiht. Then I got to a point where I had severe anxiety all the time. If I went anywhere alone, I was constantly afraid that someone was going to die. NUTS - I was nuts!

Finally, I got off Depo and switched to Nuva. Like other posters have said, it was like I found myself for the first time in years. After Depo drained (unwillingly) from my system, I became happier, more easy going and returned the laid-back approach I used to have. I've lost about half of the weight I gained while on Depo, though I acknowledge that I'm 5 years older and probably won't return to that size, which is fine. Nuva is WAY better. Nuva has lower hormones, and if you leave the ring in during the 4th week you can skip your period.

Nuva wonderful. (Depo BAD -- for me, at least.)

"I'm currently practicing abstinence. By practicing, I mean that I can't seem to get laid."

Me too. :/ I'm also on the Pill for PCOS, don't want sex without condoms, and want a tubal. ;)

When you read about the effectiveness of the Pill ("on average, about 5 out of 100 couples will get pregnant in a year while using the Pill"), they base it on "typical use" not perfect use. That means missing a pill now and then, not taking it at the exact same time each day, etc. That's why doctors always say "you'll be fine, just double up the next day."

Of course it's best to use a back-up method (condoms) if you've missed a few pills that month.

To all the pople who are mentioning having trouble getting sterilized because of your age: Don't give up!! I called several doctors and started my calls like this, "I'm 29 years old and I want to be sterilized. Will you take me as a patient?" If they had a problem with it, I moved on to the next doctor. I found a wonderful doctor on the Essure website and when I called him he said, "It's your body; it's your choice." He even went to bat for me when other doctors who assist him questioned my decision. As I wrote in my other comment above, I was diagnosed with a condition that caused me to put my sterilization plans on hold for now, but it's still an option for me if I want it.

It can be done, and doctors who believe you are able to make your decisions about your body do exist, you just have to do a little legwork to find them. Just don't give up!

I haven't been getting it on either - so abstinence for me.

Anyhow, when I did I relied on condoms back in the day. Since I haven't had much sex in my life, I am woefully ignorant of some of these methods, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't do research if need be.

To all the pople who are mentioning having trouble getting sterilized because of your age: Don't give up!! I called several doctors and started my calls like this, "I'm 29 years old and I want to be sterilized. Will you take me as a patient?" If they had a problem with it, I moved on to the next doctor. I found a wonderful doctor on the Essure website and when I called him he said, "It's your body; it's your choice." He even went to bat for me when other doctors who assist him questioned my decision. As I wrote in my other comment above, I was diagnosed with a condition that caused me to put my sterilization plans on hold for now, but it's still an option for me if I want it.

It can be done, and doctors who believe you are able to make your decisions about your body do exist, you just have to do a little legwork to find them. Just don't give up!