What brave girls! I wouldn't have had the guts to do that in grade 8. I hope they at least have support from their peers - it would be terrible if their peers were calling them sluts for daring to come in contact with ~*~condoms~*~

I hope they at least discover this link and find out that we, at least, find them to be completely badass.

Wow, what guts is right! I hope their parents support them...

that is so amazing. on a bad day, this gives me hope.

I'm so glad that you posted this..I saw it earlier today. Good for these girls for doing something about what they believe in, and as early as 8th grade. Abstinence only sex education....sigh.

I would love to send them an email to thank them for their courage. Does anyone have any contact info? I do hope they come across this post on Feministing. I hope they have the support of their parents and peers. Much love and respect goes out to these young women!!!

These girls are amazing--I never would have had the guts to do this at their age! This would make a super-sweet explanation to the college application question: "Have you ever been suspended or expelled from your school?" Any admissions officer who turns them down after that would have to be insane.

Wow! I am from the St. Louis area, and I am so proud of them! I don't think anyone at my school would do something like this!

Makes me proud they're and I are from MO:), if only for a minute.

My high school English teacher had some of those "inspirational" posters we always see, but one of them really spoke to me. I'm summarizing but I believe it said, Stand for what you believe in, even if you're standing alone.

I know it can be scary to go against the grain, or authority, but I'm proud of those young women for standing up, and standing together.

While I'm all in favor of the message these girls were delivering...

Am I the only one here who was a bit weirded out about 8th-graders wearing shirts with condoms attached to it and the word "SEX" prominantly displayed?

I mean, I applaud their political activism but... they're still children. :/

I wish I had rock-hard ovaries like that in eighth grade! Good for them!

ForbiddenComma, 8th grade was when I had formal sex ed. It wasn't the best (the teacher was about 95, with some backwards views and a supreme beeeeeyotch) but I knew what sex was, what condoms were, and so did the rest of my class. Some of them were probably already having it...I was sheltered and naive, so I didn't think of that at the time, but I bet they were.

I'm with ForbiddenComma. I think it's a bit early to go parading about supporting safe sex when you're only in 8th grade. Unless, as Liza suggests, you have some sort of structured support by the school.

I spent a year teaching 8th grade. There are kids having sex at that age and ALL the kids talk about sex (whether they are having it or not) because they are bombarded with it by TV, movies, and advertisements. Yay for those two girls!

I knew an enormous number of people who were having sex in 8th grade and was doing so by 9th. The kids today, they grow fast. (And often rely on their parents' assumption that they are "children" in order to successfully sneak the sex into their lives.)

If you're old enough to have sex education as part of a school curriculum, you're old enough to be taught about safe sex. These girls are probably too young to be having sex, but they're not too young to be learning about safe sex, nor are they too young to be harmed by the lies involved in abstinence-only education.

I learned about condoms and all that jazz in sixth grade (as well as in seventh, eighth, and ninth grade), and it did not inspire me to heretofore unknown levels of lust. In fact, I didn't lose my virginity until I was out of high school, and when I did, I knew where to get birth control and how to use a condom. Thanks sex ed!

These girls are so brave and intelligent and amazing. I would never have had the ovaries to do that at age 13.

Thank you so much for posting this.
A friend and I were discussing abortion rights and abortion in our state, in particular. In MS, we've only got one clinic, and they have it pretty rough.
It's things like this that keep us from getting depressed and giving in. Major kudos to these two. Youth activism rocks.

"I wish I had rock-hard ovaries like that in eighth grade! Good for them!"


Totally agree Liza!

I knew an enormous number of people who were having sex in 8th grade and was doing so by 9th.

Man, sometimes reading these threads makes me realize that I was even more of a loser outcast in junior high and high school than I knew at the time. I was reading science fiction and watching Doctor Who, and it's not that I didn't enjoy that, but...

" I think it's a bit early to go parading about supporting safe sex when you're only in 8th grade."

No this is not early. This is after they have already gone through some of their abstinence-only ed and right before they are going to be indoctrinated with more. I had "sex-ed" in 6th grade, where we learned about periods and that we'd die if we had sex. And then in 9th grade we learned in more detail how we would die if we had sex.

8th grade is the perfect age to be protesting this bullshit. It is during the time they are being indoctrinated with lies and kept from information about how to protect yourself. They need to protest it while it is happening, not after the fact when it is "more appropriate to their age" but after sex-ed has ended.

They are some awesome girls!

Good for these girls! I am in awe of their awesomeness.

And yes, kids do have sex in middle school, albeit not very many of them. I personally knew two people who had by the time they were 13, but a good number of people were dry-humping by that age. I grew up in California though, so maybe the rest of the country isn't so freaky.

I just wanted to put it out there that I don't think 8th grade is at all too early to publicly support safe sex. There is nothing shameful or inappropriate in promoting safe sex. These girls are definitely old enough to think for themselves.

I would never have dared to do such a thing at school. We have no abstinence only in France but we have almost no sex education (in science when the subjet is STD, young people about 14 years old are taught that condom is the best protection against aids). How old are people in 8 grade ? (I'm reading from France)

I'm impressed with those girls. And shocked about the reaction they got.

I knew about sex in 8th grade (even before that...no 'birds and bees'-BS from my parents), and I knew what condoms were. We used to blow them up and use them as balloons to play with during breaktimes. There was absolutely nothing to it. Teachers would only get a little annoyed when we played during class ;)

What's so horrible about girls wearing shirts about sensible sex? What is it about sex that children need to be 'sheltered' from it? It's the most natural thing in the world. And if it's a distraction to anybody, that just goes to show that there is some strange taboo surrounding it. I'd be horrified if I ever saw young girls wearing shirts that said "Fuck condoms" or, conversely, "The storch brought me".

Although I don't think the girls should have been suspended, the principal's phrasing that the girls' outfits were a "distraction" most likely was a reference to their dress code. Most schools have fairly vague dress codes that allow the administrators to request students to change or be removed from class on the basis of their outfits, whether that might be sagging pants, a shirt that advertises alcohol or tank tops adorned with condoms, proving to be distractions in classes.

"I learned about condoms and all that jazz in sixth grade (as well as in seventh, eighth, and ninth grade), and it did not inspire me to heretofore unknown levels of lust. In fact, I didn't lose my virginity until I was out of high school, and when I did, I knew where to get birth control and how to use a condom. Thanks sex ed!"

EXACTLY! I had sex ed in school in grades 4, 7 and 10. In 4th grade it was mostly about how puberty and the facts about how babies are made. In 7th grade it was puberty, how babies are made, and the facts about STDs. I remember having it drilled into our heads that condoms were the only form of BC that protected against STDs, and abstinence was the only surefire protection against STDs and pregnancy.

In 10th grade it was how babies are made, STDs, and childbirth. I'm glad they showed us the reality. I made the informed decision to not have sex until I was in college and felt ready to handle all of the responsibilities and protect myself against pregnancy and talk with my partner openly. I knew where to get birth control and I went to the gynecologist for the pill and regular checkups. I'm very grateful that I had the information to make the decision that was right for me.

I chatted with Cheyenne on her MySpace last night and told her the two of them were heroes! Supposedly, they have been invited to be on the Dr. Phil show on the 21st.

Those of you saying that 8th graders are too young to be dealing with this this way have no clue what it is like in middle school these days.

And props to Tory's Dad, Vic Shoemaker, who -- wearing a cap saying "Gulf War Veteran" -- for being a paradigm busting feminist Dad!

When I was in 6th grade (and I'm an old lady of 30), most of our sex-ed was a video. They separated girls and boys. Our video showed a very brief view of a baby being born, actually showing it coming out of the woman. (Come to think of it, I think that's when I decided I never, ever wanted to do that.)

Even if we think 8th graders are too young to have sex, shouldn't messages about safe sex come BEFORE people start having sex? Since prevention is the point and all.

Kids need to be taught that sex is something that just about everyone does, it's a normal, healthy, enjoyable part of life, and we shouldn't be ashamed of it.

And I'm also really impressed with those girls.

Throwing my congratulations in too.
This is the perfect age for this sort of critical thinking and school activism. I started volunteering at an AIDS service organization when I was 14, and doing safer sex education for my peers. I was thrilled and empowered by being the harbinger of sexual facts for all my friends, and felt like I had all the information to make my decisions. Over a decade later, friends still come to me for sexual health advise, and I still work on safer sex issues. And, none of this encouraged me to have sex (if anything, it gave me a lot of tools to explain why I wasn't) until after high school.

Emelire-

8th grade is about 13 years old- most turn 14 during that year.

Yea, 8th grade rocking feminists!

And now, off to work!

They're too young to be talking about something? They're too young to be thinking about their bodies?

We better tell them soon, so they can stop doing all that talking and thinking.

I'm all for comprehensive sex ed for 8th graders, and these girls are brave. But...Am I the only one who's a little troubled that the T-shirt slogan doesn't really make sense as a protest about abstinence-only? The T-shirts say "Safe Sex or No Sex"--and abstinence only says "No Sex"--it just doesn't seem that well thought through of a protest to me....

I was damn lucky in 8th grade. I went to a REALLY small school (13 kids in my class!) in 1994, and I'm surprised they did this back then, but as a group, our class went to special "classes" about AIDS, STDs, and safe sex (including condoms and birth control talks!) -- AND we went around to other classes to talk about it, AND we talked about it all to our community, too, and I remember one time a gay man with AIDS came and spoke to us. And this was in 1994. I learned so much.

I love that the grounds for the girls' suspension was that their t-shirts were 'distracting.'

You know what's more distracting than a t-shirt for a highschooler? Freaking out because your period's 5 days late, or wondering why it burns when you pee, or trying to figure out what that sore is. Or, you know, actually being pregnant and having morning sickness during math class.

I think the "safe sex or no sex" slogan is very intelligent. Unprotected sex should never happen (in a perfect world). They're not promoting abstinence, they're just saying that if you're having sex, make sure you're protecting yourself. As a person who regularly works with women who need STI testing or options on unplanned pregnancies, I don't see anything wrong with this message. I think it's great. (And yes, some 14-year-olds have sex, and I'm glad these two young women were smart enough to know that and try to spread a message).

Sara: Uh, they are 13 years old. It sounds to me like you're criticizing their slogan like they are adults, which they are not.

"Safe Sex or No Sex" is a great slogan. They are saying, "If you have sex, do it with protection or don't have sex at all." It makes total sense.

Wow! I would have never had the courage to do that in 8th grade! But, I also had the fortune to go to schools that taught comprehensive sex ed (and I went to catholic school K - 12)... and as I got older, my friends at other schools became sexually active, but they lacked the understanding of basic sexual education. One of them became pregnant, not understanding that BC can be weakened when on antibiotics etc. I spent most of my highschool and college years explaining comprehensive sex education to my friends... now I'm an animator/videographer and I'd like to do PSA's about a contraception fairy that comes and gives teenage boys/girls/men/women some form of contraception as well as advice that debunks abstinence only sex ed, (like the actual success rate of condoms) or even common myths about sex like how 'pulling out won't get you pregnant' isn't true etc. any good links or advice anyone can give me?
Thanks!!!

When I was in the 7th & 8th grade a very long time ago (1988-1989) we had an extremely thorough sex-ed program that taught us about every type of BC and STD there was (except for much about AIDS/HIV, which there still wasn't much information about). While my friends and I would giggle and roll our eyes during the classes, all of us really valued getting that information. Many, included myself, referred to it in the next several years.
It saddens me that the education I received almost 20 years ago (in Iowa, no less) is not available to many students today. Hearing about these two girls, though, gives me a lot of hope about the future!

I was in high school in Texas in the mid-90s and our sex ed consisted of a week of trying to scare the bejeezus out of us about AIDS and other STDs. But the didn't tell us that condoms help prevent them. Not surprisingly, we were scared...but not scared enough to not have sex.

Incidentally, I started having sex in 8th grade. There was at least one girl in my (predominantly white, middle-class) middle school that was pregnant. So those girls were definitely not jumping the gun. I do think that's too early to have sex (I was pressured into it by a boy a few notches above me on the popularity scale) but it's best to give them the information BEFORE they need it...'cause we all know it only takes once.

The students might be a little disheartened to find out that they'll be facing the same sort of fight in college: I attend a Catholic liberal arts college in Vermont and am having a similar fight with administration, trying to get condoms on campus. No Catholic-affiliated school in the country, except for Georgetown, allows the distribution of contraceptives anywhere on campus.

I am the father of a daughter. If my daughter has that courage at that age, I will be proud indeed.

Most kids are not having sex at 13; median age is more like 16.5. But the time to educate is before they need the information, when it's just theoretical. If you tell them after they need the information, you've done them a disservice. My daughter will know what a condom is, how is works and how effective it is before she needs to use one; in fact, she'll know that knowing what a condom is and how to use it and why it's important is a precursor to being ready for sex, that the responsibilities are both emotional and practical.

I'm not troubled by young teens talking about sex. Young teens always talk about sex. In fact, I'm really heartened that they're saying "safe sex or no sex." I hope that, from the time they decide they are ready for sex until the time they either stop having sex or stop needing to prevent pregnancy and STIs, they'll keep saying, "safe sex or no sex." That's what I want my daughter to do. The kids that say, "abstain until marriage" at 13 have a shitty track record of following through, and an even worse one of using protection when they fall short of their goal. It is both my hope and my expectation that kids who start out at "safe sex or no sex" do a lot better at standing by their plan.

I am a little disturbed by the commenter who mentioned they were invited onto the Dr. Phil show. He is a giant misogynist jerk who likes to teach women their gender roles. I hope they decline that one or Dr. Phil acts a little less obnoxiously for these awesome awesome girls.

I saw these girls on my local news last night. They were fantastic!

After the story was on our news anchor pulled at his collar and said something like, "Whew, we've got some interesting news tonight." Ohh did that make me angry!!

Good for those girls! At least someone is making people talk about it.

those girls kick ass!

it's great to see girls of such an age being aware and taking a stand.

as for whether they are "too young" to be talking about sex, i'm afraid that while i may personally think 13 or 14 is too young to be HAVING sex, 1) a lot of kids are anyway and i can't stop them; and 2) it's certainly not too young to be learning about their own bodies. maybe if more kids were exposed to comprehensive information at a younger age, they'd be more likely to use protection when they DO start having sex.

anyway, while i certainly don't believe children should be sexualized, i do think america is way too hung up on making sex The Biggest Deal Ever OMG and i think if we had a more relaxed attitude about it, like a lot of european cultures, we would be better off. part of that has to include not freaking the fuck out when kids know about/are curious about sex. it's part of human development.

I'm usually of the opinion, like Rileystclair, that our society is way too oversexed and tipped out about sex, and also that it's creepy to have 10 year olds getting so experimental when my gut says they should still be worried about cooties. (That's not in reference to these two eighth graders at all, but thinking of many cases of really young sexual encounters)

But at the same time, I think that "too young" is actually a slightly delusional argument. If we consider that historically people - women especially - were having children when they were 14, the fact that our culture has begun postponing social adulthood until much later doesn't mean we've changed the underlying biological age of adulthood. The fact that pre-teens are pretty sexual is probably something that has been fairly constant for thousands of years, while culture have raged up and down on the issue.

As a Canadian and a newcomer to feminism, there are many issues that I am still having a hard time believing that they even exist, and abstinence-only education is one of them.

Here, sex education starts at fifth grade (mainly studies of anatomy, and the way bodies work, both male and female) and every year after that it gets a little more graphic and detailed.
So, it seems really weird to me that eighth graders are fighting for a right that we have so easily here.
Hopefully those girls protesting opened some eyes, and one day there will be sex ed for all!