Calling female genitalia by pussy doesn't bother me. It's just another name for it that some people are comfortable with. It's like taking back the word "cunt". It's just a word. We can either give it power or take away power. I refuse to give it any power.

I commented over on Feministe:

I’ve had the request from several partners. I don’t mind. I’ve tried it every way possible. I’m not partial to the bare look but I’ve done it.

I’m not a big shaver, though. I don’t shave my legs (I have very fine strawberry blond hair that people can rarely even see) and I shave my pits seldomly.

My last partner liked au naturale and I was happy with that.

I’ve had partners who have shaved and others who haven’t. Personally, I don’t care. I want him to be happy with himself and with his self-image and would hope he’d want the same for me. If not, it’d be adios, amigo.

it wasn't that i found it offensive...it just seemed out of character for his column. kind of like...if i heard my dad say pussy. ew.

Jessica, is there a preferred term for your dad to use for female genitals, or is your issue that you just want him to avoid the subject?

all out avoidance. let's stop talking about it. ugh.

Ahhh. Okay. That makes sense.

It kind of made me laugh since the post right before this used the terms "cock" and "dick". We have lot's of names for male genitalia, as well.

I used to think requiring women to shave their pussies was the height or body fascism. I mean, not only are ridiculous standards being applied to the rest of our bodies, but now to our cunts as well? I thought it was one step away from vaginoplasty. However, that was before I went down on a girl. Getting tufts of pubic hair stuck between your teeth is not disgusting, but it is irritating and means having to come up for air every so often to spit hairs out of your mouth. So I started to come round to the idea of some form of hair removal. I also find having long pubic hair makes masturbation difficult, as you have to stop constantly and comb hair out of the way so you can get at the clit. In the past I used to just trim it a little, just to neaten it up a bit, but a week or so ago I took the plunge and shaved most of it off - it's still there but just lots shorter. And I love it! I'm not expecting to get laid in the near future, but when I do next have a date I think I'll cut it even shorter or have it waxed or something.

I shave my armpits and sometimes wax my legs, just cos I personally prefer being hairless. I also find hairlessness more attractive in a partner, no matter what their gender. I don't find hairy chests or tufts of armpit hair poking out very attractive in males, and I'd prefer him to shave and wax just as much as I do! I'd never insist on a partner shaving if they didn't want to, and I'd never act as though there's anything wrong with it. It's just my personal preference.

For the record, I still believe that vaginoplasty is the height of body fascism.

As long as you shave it because YOU like it then who cares? I do it for myself cause I like it and I don't get ingrowns or anything. Its just a personal preference. And not all guys/gals like it cause it looks better....it just FEELS good!

I have to say that I'm a little disturbed by the woman writing in and assuming that her partner liked her shaved pussy because it looked like a baby's... someone in my college dorm used to say that, too. "Guys like shaved pussies because it reminds them of little girls. They're perverts." I'm sure for some men that's true, but I think it may be more an issue of, as has been already pointed out, not getting hairs in your mouth. If a guy (or woman, for that matter) is issuing a shaving ultimatum, however... yeah. They need to go.

Though I second the "it just FEELS good" comment from WCGoddess.

Also: major points for the hairless pussy(cat) in the article.

I personally am not a fan of the cleanly shaven pussy. I also get a little creeped out by men who prefer that because it reminds me of pre-pubescent girls or porn stars, which are two things I am not, nor trying to emulate. You can leave a landing strip or a small amount of hair while still leaving the important parts hair free.

My mom actually does brazilian waxes. She has some highly entertaining stories.

It's a little painful, but really, it takes her about ten minutes. And then I don't have to deal with the itchiness of things poking me, or the possibility of cutting myself while shaving, or razor burn.

My boyfriend liked it because his skin is extremely sensitive, and the extra friction gives him a rash. But the first time I did it, it had nothing to do with him. I was just tired of either shaving or feeling itchy and uncomfortable down there.

I love the shaved kitty.

I've never gone for the full brazillian wax... but when I did a partial one, it was horrible! I went to a waxer who several of my friends recommended, she was pretty expensive, too... and the skin where I was waxed was sore and covered in red bumps for about a week! Gross! Trust me, if you have sensitive skin... IT DOES NOT FEEL GOOD.

Also--and more importantly--I hated the way it looked. I felt like my pussy went from being this awesome, sexy, wild part of my body to this little shameful trimmed lawn trying to disappear between my legs.

i've had men ask me to shave, and it only pisses me off because i know it's a relatively new cultural thing. it's practically expected that women shave their pubic hair, in the US anyway. I don't know about all other countries, but I know there are many where au natural is the norm. Doesn't the expectation stem simply from our porn culture? I think a lot of young men today expect it, and that's what offends me.

That being said, I don't see anything wrong with shaving for comestic purposes. I like the smooth look every once in awhile. The problem is I find shaving a complete pain, and I haven't found a way to do it without really unsightly razor bumps. I'll try waxing next but if that doesn't work, I'll go back to trimming and future sexual partner(s) will just have to deal.

I’m OCD and the way it can be expressed is very, very weird. I just cannot stand the feeling - or knowing - of hair or too much hair ON me. On the other hand, I cannot cut the hair on my head and never have in my life. So, yeah, I shave it off. Sometimes all of it. Mind you, I certainly don’t do it based on what some guy thinks is “gross� or “cool�, but just because I want to.

I’m 22 years old, by the way. I’ve found that guys also shave much of their pubic hair. It really isn’t something explored much, but it happens much more than the media and pop-culture let on. Because women’s body parts are all over the place and not those of men, of course.

This post makes me itch.

The whole brazilian thing mystifies me anyway...I was never good at suffering for beauty. I won't even wear pantyhose except under duress, high heels either. I cannot imagine applying hot wax to my lady parts and then ripping off all the hair. It sounds like something invented at Guantanamo. Shudder. A little scissor trimming seems like plenty of concession to me.

First, the cat pick rocks.

Second - I don't care if my lover shaves or not. There are basic hygiene issues I'm picky about, but shaved pubes is a non-issue.

I've removed hair from various parts of my body, sometimes just out of curiousity. Incidentally, boys - DO NOT put Nair on your balls. There are few things less dignified than high pitched squealing as you madly try to contort yourself into a position where the shower spray hits your nads squarely. Don't put Nair on anything, but especially don't put it on your balls.

togolosh, ouch. On behalf of any men readign this who might have considered Nairing their scrota, thanks for the tip. :o)

Love the cat pic.

Cheers,

TH

My mom went totally ballistic with righteous feminist anger when she found out about this being the norm- as she considers even shaving your legs to be bowing down to the patriarchical forces that be. However- I prefer it because I just feel cleaner that way. I've been doing it since I first started shaving my legs- before I even knew that other people did it, just because I didn't like it. However, I really don't think it should be compulsory. Well- ok, I think that if someone's gonna be around there, you should be as neat and clean as possible- just out of, you know, courtesy.

I shave off everything for purely personal reasons--I'm more sensitive to touch (my own or my lover's) and, in this heat wave, so much cooler! (which is one of the reasons I go commando in the summer--the other? Look ma, no panty lines! ^_^)

Hmmm... I wonder why men never shave their balls for cleanliness or courtesy. It seems like we always end up doing whatever they want us to do "for personal reasons".

For a start, I guess part of it is that fellatio doesn't involve ball-licking. Plus I don't know that any male has ever reported that shaving his balls makes him feel less hot (but then again, I don't know of any male who has shaved his balls, period...).

"For a start, I guess part of it is that fellatio doesn't involve ball-licking."

My response to this is the same as when Woody Allen was asked if he thought sex was dirty; "Only if it's done right."

"but then again, I don't know of any male who has shaved his balls, period..."

I am that male. It was suggested to me by a lover of mine who thankfully did not know that fellatio doesn't involve ball-licking.

"Hmmm... I wonder why men never shave their balls for cleanliness or courtesy. It seems like we always end up doing whatever they want us to do "for personal reasons"."

Some men do shave their balls. After I had done it, I asked my friends and was surprised to hear that I wasn't the only one who had been asked by a woman to shave. One guy had said "hell no", but a couple had done it.

As for "we always end up doing whatever they want us to do", I think that there are a few posts here, and many more on the thread at feministe where women are telling men to go to hell when requested to shave. Perhaps you would have been more accurate with "I always end up doing whatever they want me to do".

I've known guys who shaved their balls (including one who proudly informed me he'd mastered the perfect technique, lol) so they are out there. I can see why some wouldn't--the looser skin has got to be quite tricky to shave--but I can also understand why some would, and do. Pretty much for the same reasons women do it; heightened sensitivity, looks neater, easier to keep clean (hair traps smelly bacteria) and lovers are usually more willing to go down on you. I don't think it's about sexism or the patriarchy or porn culture, personally. I think it's more about practicality, personal preference, and consideration for one's partner--none of which I consider bad things.
As for the word "pussy," I'm not bothered by it. "Cunt" I find extremely hostile, but "pussy" to me can sound affectionate in the right context. (Maybe because I like cats?) Generally speaking though, the words used are less important than the tone and intent of the person using them. Words aren't bad or good, but the connotations we apply to them can be.

Put me in the trimming camp. I was never able to get the hang of shaving or waxing without razor burn, inrown hairs, pricklies, or other discomfort, so I've settled on just keeping it short with an electric trimmer.

I first tried hairlessness at the suggestion of my now-husband, who has been trimming ever since an old girlfriend got him into the habit. It makes oral sex more enjoyable for both of us - no hairs in the teeth, easier to see what you're doing, nothing to get in the way of sensations. And I don't see the bald pussy as any sort of weird pre-pubescent thing. My genitals don't look like a child's genitals - they look like a grown woman's genitals without hair, maybe even more so since the lack of hair means a better view.

"Hmmm... I wonder why men never shave their balls for cleanliness or courtesy. It seems like we always end up doing whatever they want us to do "for personal reasons"." - sojourner

Some do. [raises hand] The better trimmed or shaved a girl is, the more I like to go down on her. I find this it true of women as well.

"For a start, I guess part of it is that fellatio doesn't involve ball-licking." - Alon Levy

You are young. There is still plenty of time.

when i cared what frat boys thought of me, my life was a nightmare of obsession with my body hair. i spent precious hours of my youth plucking, bleaching, waxing, and trimming.

then i got a crush on a guy whose last crush was twenty pounds overweight, and the one before that, while beautiful, had a barely-noticeable mustache. both women were witty and a lot of fun.

since i nabbed that guy, i couldn't be happier. i shave a bit because the swimsuit industry hates women, but the trend toward american women feeling like they have to do this is really worrying.

I keep my bush in tact, but I shave my labia. I don't mind the way hair looks, but as a pussy-eating enthusiast, it's much more pleasant not to have to worry about discreetly spitting hair out for the next 12 hours. It's just common courtesy to whoever is going down on me.

I recently stopped shaving my underarms. I still shave my legs because I like them to be smooth.

Oh, and I shaved my head earlier this week.

I like to be clean shaven because I hate the feeling of pubic hair. I started doing it before it became mainstream thing. And I like my partner (male) clean shaven as well.

I think it makes sex better because there are more sensations and no hairs getting caught in anything.

Also, a tip for razor burn/in grown hairs-use AFTERSHAVE. I use my partner's and it works great.

In defense of male shaving/trimming, I offer this; still-solidly attatched hairs getting caught during attempts to remove condoms.

This thread and the one at Feministe have gotten me started thinking about trimming with an electric razor.

I like to be bald (um, hello...NO RESISTANCE?), but also have never done the Brazilian. I actually don't mind the shaving process.

Most guys I'm with (especially the younger ones) reciprocate by trimming. I think your grooming habits are directly proportional to the amount of time you want your partner's mouth to remain in your crotchs.

Wow. I have never, ever slept with a man who used any grooming process on his body hair beyond letting water run over it the shower. Either you are all much younger than I am and this is a generational thing, or you are all sleeping with much more...I don't know...body conscious? men than I ever meet.

I think shaving body hair does have to do with patriarchal infantilization of women; that said, I do shave my legs and armpits, because I grew up in this culture too, and my likes and dislikes are informed by it, and you have to pick your battles--I have a limited amount of energy, and I found that one attention-consuming all out of proportion to what it was worth.

I don't see anything upsetting in the pussy ad -- it's just a simplification of the advertising concept that is beat to death for Men's Body Shaving at http://www.shaveeverywhere.com/

I honestly don't mind if a woman has pubic hair or not becuase I have lots of it. I think that certain men fantize about a women being as shaved as a 13 year old girl. So those women shave themselves. It's like the reason why some women arch their eyebrows. Men don't really notice that. As long as you have two that's great. I think that as long as some women remain insecure and shallow the media will not stop shaping the image of women. Women have to get a hold of themsleves, then the media pressure will disseapear.

I shave because it is what *I* prefer. I think big bushes are gross. It is a personal preference type thing. I started shaving as a teenager-before I knew other people did.

My first husband hated my shaving and would make me grow a bush. I will never ever do that again. I will be 70 years old doing bathtub yoga to get every hair. I also shave my legs, arms, and armpits.

My husband says overall he prefers if a woman is trimmed or shaved (for ease in oral sex) but he isn't as picky as me. (he shaves himself even though I don't want him to).

I don't make the connection to the "little girl" thing. Most adolescent girls don't shave and do have hair. And the rest of my body can attest to the fact that I am a woman.

It has nothing to do with feminism. Aren't feminists supposed to be for women's rights? Well, I like my pussy smooth. And THAT is MY right.

And I prefer the word cunt, personally. I don't find it offensive that he used the word "pussy". I think sometimes people look for insults where there are none.

I shave because it is what *I* prefer. I think big bushes are gross. It is a personal preference type thing. I started shaving as a teenager-before I knew other people did.

My first husband hated my shaving and would make me grow a bush. I will never ever do that again. I will be 70 years old doing bathtub yoga to get every hair. I also shave my legs, arms, and armpits.

My husband says overall he prefers if a woman is trimmed or shaved (for ease in oral sex) but he isn't as picky as me. (he shaves himself even though I don't want him to).

I don't make the connection to the "little girl" thing. Most adolescent girls don't shave and do have hair. And the rest of my body can attest to the fact that I am a woman.

It has nothing to do with feminism. Aren't feminists supposed to be for women's rights? Well, I like my pussy smooth. And THAT is MY right.

And I prefer the word cunt, personally. I don't find it offensive that he used the word "pussy". I think sometimes people look for insults where there are none.