Hey! I feel excluded!

I want my stereotypes, too. Please, Clarice, tell me what's wrong with me. Why am I a feminist? Am I gay? (but how to explaint that wife and kid at home?) Or am I doing it to scam on chicks? But if all feminist women are either gay or fat and ugly -- I must be doing this because I have a preference for overweight, unattractive women ... who are nevertheless in such demand that I must adopt feminist positions to ...

I'm sorry. I'm too dumb to understand my own stereotype. Please explain it to me.

Wow. What a complete fucktard who doesn't know a damn thing about feminism or feminists, and stupidly believes all of the negative and absurd stereotypes reinforced by the popular media about feminists and feminism.

And what is the dipshit talking about?! You gals are hot!

And gee, look how wrong he is about what ALL feminists are and look like: I'm an ardent feminist and yet I'm petite, enjoy shaving my legs, working out, wear eye make-up, and got a date to the prom twice, and both guys were from the "Jock Crowd". Well I was buddies and "the platonic female friend" with all of them since elementary school and was their football manager. Oh and look, I have mostly male friends who are Jocks!

And I wonder if this moron has an explanation as to why although I was a platonic friend with these guys, they still made suggestive comments about my body, and kept asking me "why the hell are you still a virgin and why don't you have a boyfriend?! You want to go with my buddy? He has a crush on you." Dorks. Still, you know, since all of us hetero feminists are fat ugly chicks, according to this antifeminist-boy's crystal ball, why would this occur? Not that I enjoyed those particular comments and questions from my friends, but it certainly proves why this guy clearly has no idea what he's talking about.

But I guess the dumbshit knows everything and everyone, and has met and spoken with every feminist on the planet. He just has issues with women who don't take shit from sexist men or vehemently antifeminist women.

Maybe he's the one who didn't get a date to the prom.

"I'm sorry if this seems rude, but I'm so biased and confident in my own view of reality that I won't even read what you have to say before I shoot it down and display my own lack of knowledge. Please explain to me how my impressions of reality are true in every aspect as I won't be willing to accept that I might be wrong.

Thanks so much."

Um. Yeah.
So, I guess I should replace my "this is what a feminist looks like" tee with one that says "this is what an ugly chick looks like". I'll get right on that, just as soon as I finish the 25% more paid hours that I'd have to do in order to make up the wage gap.

90% of the time trolls make comments like that to me I suspect they are trying to get me to describe my looks and body to them.

Amanda, that's the creepiest thought ever. But funny...like we're going to say, "No, really, I'm cute--just check out this pic of my tits!"

What high school did this girl go to (and is this really a girl)? Because Jessica went to mine and I remember her as being anything but fat, ugly and dateless.

I said "guy" on purpose because I do doubt it's a female. It could be more of that "look how many women hate feminism" propaganda pushed by men.

*rolls eyes* It reminds me of the time a person I worked with declared that I "must be gay. He's a vegetarian, you know. They're all gay." Classic.

MD, you're a Stuy alum? Email me and we can trade school gossip...nice.

Oh wow. So no one but ugly girls can be feminists. Count me as ugly then (though I'm cute!)

Ooooh, is she taking a survey?

How like the anti-fems/righties to be so shallow. Remember, Michael Moore is FAT. Haha, FAT! Don't listen to whatever points he might be making -- just remember, he's FAT! And feminists are ugly lesbians! Don't forget; just keep acting like we're all still in middle school!

PseudoAdrienne, even though you're cute and were popular in high school, the fact that you were still a virgin and not desperate to get a boyfriend would be enough evidence to prove to this Clarice person that you're a closet lesbian. To really disprove the theory, you have to give it up to any guy who wants it.

Sad. I know a lot of feminists who are very attractive physically and are perfectly straight. Just a couple of points in response to this thread:

PseudoAdrienne ... I know you think it's propoganda, and you're entitled to your opinion, but surveys are showing that more young women are rejecting the feminist movement for a return to more defined sex roles ... http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/this_britain/story.jsp?story=618472

I hope it's propoganda. There are guys like me who not only think women should be treated equitably, but should also contribute to the household equitably.

Actually I was NOT popular in high school, I just knew the guys who were, and hung out with them. The popular girls on the other hand, who were definitely antifeminist, didn't take to me very kindly. Oh well.

And yes Shawn, I noticed that a lot of young women are antifeminist. They don't want to be associated with all of those negative and bullshit stereotypes applied to feminists, or they simply don't understand what feminism is really all about, and what it has done for them.

And they don't want to "put off" any guys. I think the reason why some antifeminist girls are that way because they're constantly seeking male validation. If only they knew there were guys like you who aren't intimidated by feminist women.

Joan, you're absolutely right. In order to be deemed not a lesbian, a girl has to seek male approval through lots of sexual encounters with them. A lot of this has to do with pleasing guys and being their eye candy and sex toy. Something that is constantly pushed by Pop-Culture.

PseudoAdrienne, I have a good friend who is a conservative feminist (I know, that sounds like an oxymoron, but bear with me) and we have had many conversations to this effect. She's my age, a single mother and a very successful civil engineer. She's a beautiful woman, as well, but has trouble getting dates. One guy told her blatantly it's because she is such a bitch (a term, IMO, many men use in place of strong woman). She is intimidating to men for two reasons: 1. She's strikingly attractive. 2. She's independently successful and does not have to depend on anyone.

I personally think she's a gem of a woman (there's reasons we can't date that I really don't want to go into). She actually had a conversation with me recently that perhaps she needs to change things about herself. I almost fell over. I am no feminist, but I respect people who are true to who they are. After a lengthy conversation she came to agree with me that if she found a man based on false pretenses, she would never be happy. After having these heart-to-hearts with her, I realized that even some of the strongest women I know still seek the "male validation" of which you speak.

Gotta say, I agree about the 'put out/play up or you're a lesbian' thing. I prefered male company to female in highschool, if only to avoid the bitchiness of girls my age, yet I was regarded as 'probably lesbian' because I never felt inclined to date any of the guys I hung out with. It wasn't even anything to do with a feminist position, I was simply 1) not attracted, and 2) a strict brainwashed christian (at the time). Still, whatever one's personal reasons for not playing up to adolescent guys, you were regarded as deviant for not filling the standard role. I have to say though, that it has more to do with the rigid bounds of adolescent social life than anything else. Wierd exaggerated versions of adult roles are part and parcel of that whole scene. Unfortunately, 'pop culture' seems to push those adolescent social oddities as a part of normal adult life, instead of a phase to be outgrown.

And remember, there are NO bisexual feminists!

hackneyed comment, or plagiarized? i'm pretty sure i heard rush limbaugh saying the exact same thing.

the last resort for people with weak arguments is to hit the people they disagree with personal attacks.

Translation:

"Why are strawperson arguments so easy to knock down? I can't believe how easily my caricatured and willfully ignorant portrait of feminism is trounced. It's remarkable, really."

But I'm an ugly feminist, does that mean this fuckwad is right?! Did I prove this person's point? And I'm bisexual! Oh dear god, no!

Seriously, though, bullshit like that never ceases to amaze/apall/annoy/make me laugh loudly. Some people.

Your arguments of women seeking validation from men and struggling to not be portrayed as a lesbian fall to pieces when you see how much lesbian/bi is portrayed as such a positive thing. Add to that how many women are seeking out sexual encounters with other women to try and earn this label and I fail to see how you can think that way.

(Although we both may be right here... the whole "I'm bi too" thing has really picked up in recent years)

Awaiting opinions.....

Hmmm, I'm a lesbian, and am openly feminist ... erg, guess I might be a cliche.

But then, I shop at NY&Co, Anne Taylor, Express, Gap, am very femme, get taken for straight ALL the bloody time, would rather die than have her razor taken away, and I tend to prefer guy roommates over women (so long as that bloody seat issue is dealt with early), and my gf compares my make-up skills to those of a gay man (ROTFLOL!). And I never had any issue getting a date for the prom ... unfortunately *shudder*

Oh, and I'm a doctoral candidate ;)

I would love to laugh at insanely pathetic stereotypes like these, but honestly, the scary thing is that they have social credence, as the overwhelming numbers of young women that avoid the label like the plague ("You'll never get a boy if you're a feminist!") attest to. I think that's why those of us that are feminists need to be so damn open about it, to show our wonderful diversity.

When they can't 'other' us, then they can't distance themselves.

"Your arguments of women seeking validation from men and struggling to not be portrayed as a lesbian fall to pieces when you see how much lesbian/bi is portrayed as such a positive thing."

I have to disagree. I don't think the way lesbians,and bi-sexual women are portrayed positively at all! On the rare occasion lesbians are portrayed its for male titilation, and acceptance. Lesbians, are often portrayed as nothing more than straight women wannabes!

" Add to that how many women are seeking out sexual encounters with other women"

That is nonsense brought on by actresses looking for publicity, and magazines wanting to sell more magazines. The majority of straight women have absolutely no desire to have a fling with another woman!
cypherpunk, you've obviously fallen for what the advertisers are selling! Congratulations.

That's ridiculous, I get told all the time how beautiful and hot I am (not that I necessarily think so) but I know I'm attractive, AND I'm also straight, AND surprise, surprise a flaming feminist!!!! Stereotypes are never good!