White Skinned Insta-Witches: We Can Do Better

White women, we can do better.

This is addressed to my fellow white-skinned earth-lovin’ sisters…the ones who put sparkles in your pictures to censor nipples for the Insta-patriarchy, make potions of plants you grow or wild-harvest, and generally are falling in love with the world around you as you care deeply and wildly for your self. Sometimes this community I find myself in is described as feminist spiritualist, healers, and/or witchy and I relate to so much within this movement. I’ve gathered with many of you at new moons and full moons, shared meals, found you at V-day events, and benefited from your company in many ways.

There is this one thing that stays with me, though. It’s something I can’t let go and always hope will be better at the next gathering. It’s something that is deeply flawed about this movement, and that  t h i n g  is: everyone basically looks the same- and it’s not a coincidence. It doesn’t feel like there is room in the circle for women of color, women with less privilege, or even people who don’t identify with the term woman. The circle seems closed in many ways, even though you say it is open and often talk around the problem.

Yes, there may be a woman of color present but she is the exception among you. She is often there to serve the event in some way- sometimes as entertainment or other times to offer something from her culture’s spirituality. My friends who have been tokenized in this way have expressed not feeling equal, seen, or truly included. And that is just the tip of the iceberg.

This December, I attended a book release event in Berkeley with an older generation of this movement. I went because many women I admire were going to be there to speak. Some included Vicki Noble (co-creator of the Motherpeace feminist round Tarot deck), Luisah Teish (author and teacher), and Starhawk (author). I was hopeful that some pearls of wisdom would be passed down from my elders and that I’d see a more diverse crowd than I’ve seen at other witchy lady events.

However, I found it really hard to listen when the room was filled with mostly white, middle to upper class women. Luisah Teish was unable to attend, as was another woman of color who was to speak. And I noticed that most of the other women of color at the event were there to sing backup to white women. They left after singing. My partner and the friend we brought as our guest are both women of color. Our friend shared that she experienced a feeling of invisibility. No one looked her in the eye and one white woman took a book right out of her hand, as if my friend were there as a book-prop for the white woman.

The kicker for me is how a room full of white women took from the spiritual beliefs of other cultures- indigenous and African included, yet they couldn’t look a brown woman in the eye at the their event. Vicki Noble  mentioned the matter of privilege and noted how white women started the movement, but that as they grew, they included more women of color from more diverse backgrounds. She said, “We’ve used our privilege well.” I think that if that were true, well – the room would represent that.

Prior to this event, I posted about it on Instagram, encouraging my generation of feminist spiritualists who follow my account to honor our elders- women who paved the way for what many of us are practicing. I’ve seen a huge disconnect between generations and was hoping to be a part of bridging it. One young woman showed up as a result of the post, and she emailed me after the event to say she enjoyed it, but as a woman of color, she was disappointed by the lack of diversity in the room.

I felt embarrassed to have encouraged her attendance. I feel embarrassed to be white. I am not, however, embarrassed to be an ally who takes this opportunity to talk to my witchy white goddess-loving community of all ages about the gap between what we think we present from the front and what we live out in the world. We have to be willing to look at our privilege and have honest accountability about it. If this seems like a vague and sticky topic to you, there are resources online if you delve into the topics of white privilege and cultural appropriation.

If people aren’t participating in your events, find out why. Check your language, website, prices, accessibility, and message. And if you are okay with having a grown-up sorority, go for it. Just know that when you use your power to get people of color and from low incomes to come and teach your white, middle to upper class group something sacred to their land and culture, it is an abuse of privilege. Paying people for their time and skill is not the issue here either- The issue is one of failing to welcome to ALL as EQUALS and then stealing from the sacred beliefs of those you oppress. It’s a new spin on the old story of how our white ancestors invaded this land and now white people want the pieces of native knowledge and beliefs that suit them.

No wonder people of color are pissed off. As white people who claim to be part of a healing community, we have a hell of a lot of work to do in mending these giant scars. I hope that one place we can address those scars and our role is in places we gather for spiritual nourishment. I hope we can truly open the circles we are a part of and have integrity about the rituals and practices we participate in. I hope the organizers of these events can stop defending themselves so hard and instead learn to say things like:

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m listening.”

“We have work to do.”

“Thank you for sharing your experience with me.”