Domestic responsibilities by choice

As I was sitting down in a very uncomfortable black leather chair, discussing feminism with an extremely ignorant boy, we came across the topic of women’s domestic responsibilities. 

His argument: Women must raise their child and stay in the household, throwing away any aspects of a career they may have. The husband, of course, would be expected to make the mula. If the woman had wanted to continue her career and raise a child, that would indefinitely make her a bad mother.

What he said completely threw me off, because, well, this is 2015. Are people still this close-minded?  YES, THEY ARE.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I was raised in a blessed household, with a beautiful Lebanese mother who stayed home to raise my brother and me. By doing this, she established a strong motherly bond with her children, as my father worked efficiently in order to provide for his family. For that, I am forever grateful. But my mother never had the choice of a career; she couldn’t go to college, and was taught to marry directly after high school. Would she have chosen to quit her job in order to raise her children? Yes, because she would have wanted to, and that’s a great thing.

Disregarding the women who choose to cook and clean at home, rather than go to college, is not feminism.  Feminism is respecting their proclaimed choices. Just like in the movie, Mona Lisa Smile, **SPOILERS** where Julia Stiles, playing an intelligent young student at UCLA, gets accepted into Yale Law School, but instead chooses to get married and become a stereotypical 50s housewife.

Image source: Becoming the Ultimate Housewife

If a woman wants to work and make money WHILE raising a child, how does that make her a bad mother? If anything, that would make an even more awesome role model for her children to look up to.

Bottom line, if you force a woman to quit her job to encounter domestic responsibilities when she doesn’t want to, she may blame you or her children for her neglected interests. Thus, resulting in bad parenting. Wrongful prioritization, as putting work over your family, is not the same as wanting to have a career and a family.

As we both further debated this, he continued to repeat his points, those being: he’s a meninist (*rolling of eyes*), women will never reach the same level as men (Does he listen to the news?), only a woman can raise a child (Gay couples? Single dads?).

How do I know that my points in our debate were justified? Because I didn’t omit his beliefs, I simply stated that it should all be determined by choice. Domestic responsibilities should be the woman’s choice.

Of course, this argument ended badly. Very badly. All I wish is that one day he may be guided through the feministic light.

As I conclude, I’d like to compare feminism to the African-American Civil Rights Movement from 1954-68. Racial slurs and oppression were commonly accepted, much like how slut-shaming and female stereotyping is now. Then, protests occurred, and people finally began to see how unjust their beliefs were  Feminism is going through very similar reactions now; we are educating the public, and making a change.

People must learn to adjust to society’s reforms.  It’s time to change our old-fashioned mindsets.

Header image: Onlinemoviequotes.com