A short list of ways white people can be less oppressive

I’ve had a particularly “uncomfortable” weekend. I won’t go into the specifics, but I’ve  been at the center of more than one triggering and oppressive moment with white folks this weekend. So I would like to share a short list of things that white people can do to not make a black girl like me feel like shit.

1. If you want to compliment my hair, wonderful. But please don’t touch it without my permission. And it’s also a little awkward when you say that you wish you could have hair like mine.

2. Please do not claim to understand white privilege and then ask me how to help you be a better ally to people of color. I don’t fucking know. I’m too busy trying to deal with being black. Go read some books. Google it. Or better yet, go talk to other white people about how to not do racist shit. Side note: I googled “how to be an ally to people of color” and immediately found this post

3. This one is a little tricky and I fully expect a few white feminists to push back on this, but don’t critique hip hop for objectifying women when you clearly don’t listen to it and because you are not seeing bodies that look like yours being exploited. We got this. Thanks.

4. And on that note, don’t expect me to know all the hip hop songs. I don’t. A lot of that shit is extremely painful to listen to.

5. Understand that your intentions do not change the way you made someone feel, or make your actions any less triggering or oppressive.

6. Do not use this list, or any other, to gauge whether or not you have checked your privilege. It is not exhaustive.

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23 Comments

  1. Posted March 19, 2013 at 6:29 pm | Permalink

    i like this post for a few reasons. one, it did make me feel uncomfortable. as a white woman, i am aware of some of the privileges that i take for granted and am still trying to figure out ways to even the playing field. two, i am guilty of committing some of these actions in the past and learned the hard way not to engage in this behavior and what it signifies. i also read the link you posted and found that to be extremely insightful. i’m not perfect, i screw up, and i’m glad that there are people who push back and it lets me know when i’m not aware of others’ circumstances and to be more responsive and responsible. lastly, i worry that i may say the wrong thing when it comes to these issues. i am literally at a lost of what the right thing to say is and that lets me know that i have work to do. so thank you for posting your thoughts on a sensitive issue because we can never make any progress on anything unless someone has the guts to speak up!

  2. Posted March 19, 2013 at 8:08 pm | Permalink

    Disclaimer: I’m white.

    “This one is a little tricky and I fully expect a few white feminists to push back on this, but don’t critique hip hop for objectifying women when you clearly don’t listen to it and because you are not seeing bodies that look like yours being exploited. We got this. Thanks.”

    When white people talk about hip hop, it’s a general rule that it gets really racist, really fast. I’ve tried to communicate to my white friends that I’m not interested in talking about hip hop, since in most of these conversations, we appear (/are) incredibly ignorant and it suddenly becomes white privilege hour.

    I’ve noticed that hip hop music is one of the pathways by which a lot of white people are confronted with not-exclusively-white culture and expression. I think we need to refocus and instead have conversations about how messed up that is/why we pay such little attention to other non-white affairs.

  3. Posted March 19, 2013 at 10:04 pm | Permalink

    “This one is a little tricky and I fully expect a few white feminists to push back on this, but don’t critique hip hop for objectifying women when you clearly don’t listen to it and because you are not seeing bodies that look like yours being exploited. We got this. Thanks.”
    I am going to push back on this. I can’t help but hear the hip hop that objectifies women, it’s all around me. It doesn’t just affect black women it affects all women, kids of all races and classes listen to it. There are also horrific white rock bands that are equally misogynistic and treat women as objects…but that affects all races and classes too. You got this? Then please share because it’s a problem across all cultures that affects our gender collectively.

  4. Posted March 19, 2013 at 11:38 pm | Permalink

    Ugh, I have to stop using the word “disclaimer.” I claim it all.

  5. Posted March 20, 2013 at 12:24 am | Permalink

    In regards to the third point about white women critiquing hip-hop music, I think it would be great if you and the rest of the feministing crew could do an entire piece just on this topic. That is, do you think white feminists can/should critique the sexism of hip-hop at all? Personally, I tend to have a bigger problem with music that casually mentions perpetrating domestic violence than anything else. I think this is a pretty relevant topic, given how far across cultures the influence of hip hop has spread.

  6. Posted March 20, 2013 at 2:59 am | Permalink

    “don’t critique hip hop for objectifying women when you clearly don’t listen to it.” “And on that note, don’t expect me to know all the hip hop songs. I don’t. ”

    Um, yeah. I think I’ve heard about enough here.

    FYI, it is rude to touch anyone’s hair without their permission or invitation.

  7. Posted March 20, 2013 at 7:48 am | Permalink

    While I APPLAUD you for speaking up about things that are not okay (insensitive, oppressive, and ignorant comments that you’re getting), is it really necessary t0 direct this soley at “white people” and not instead call this “how not to be oppressive [regardless of your race]“? Do you seriously believe that ALL white people act like that?? And that it is specifically white people who act like that (as opposed to people who are just hopelessly self-involved/unaware), regardless of their race??

    I always believed that the fundamental cornerstone of HUMAN and WOMEN’S rights is that we should not judge people for something out of their control/how they were born. “White” is just as loaded of a concept as any other race or gender name. Yes, I have white skin, but no, I refuse to have other people tell me how “I” act (giving me a list of offensive things “I” do), and what type of universal privilege “I” have. I DO listen to hip hop, thank you very much, but I don’t consider what type of music I listen to to be a singular indicator of my capacity for human empathy or my ability to understand a particular perspective. Unless you know my entire life story, where I’ve grown up, and what type of social-economic situation I’ve had: sorry, you do not know what type of “privilege” I’ve had—any more than I can truly understand yours.

    I have to agree with Bell Hooks on this one: “I’m so disturbed when my women students behave as though they can only read women, or black students behave as though they can only read blacks, or white students behave as though they can only identify with a white writer.” Oppressive behaviors are NOT OKAY. But neither is racial-type casting and an attitude of close-mindness—from any direction.

    • Posted March 20, 2013 at 7:05 pm | Permalink

      “Do you seriously believe that ALL white people act like that??”

      Well, I won’t speak for Sesali, but I’d imagine she doesn’t. I don’t understand how you could possible get that from the OP. It’s really weird how many people in the comments here and on Facebook are getting so defensive about the title. If you’re a white person and you don’t do anything of the things on this list, great job! Then she’s not talking to you. (Although, as Sesali said, it’s not an exhaustive list, so, you know, just keep being aware of your white privilege.)

      “And that it is specifically white people who act like that (as opposed to people who are just hopelessly self-involved/unaware), regardless of their race??”

      Well, yes, it’s a list of things that exhibit white privilege from the perspective of a black woman. I don’t know, but I’d imagine that yes, in Sesali’s experience, it is mostly white people who are doing these things.

      “Yes, I have white skin, but no, I refuse to have other people tell me how “I” act (giving me a list of offensive things “I” do), and what type of universal privilege “I” have.”

      Again, if you don’t do any of these things, then this post isn’t talking about how “you” act. But if you have white skin, then yes, you do have white privilege. Sorry to break it to you.

    • Posted March 20, 2013 at 8:45 pm | Permalink

      For serious? If it doesn’t apply to you, don’t make it about you. What you’re doing here, making sure that everyone knows that not ALL white people act this way, creates a situation in which you are (probably unintentionally) asking the people of color (POC) in the room to reassure you that yes, you are One of The Good Ones. That is so not their job. If you want to prove that you are one of the good ones, do it by your actions, not by passionately defending white people on the internet. Because if there’s one thing white people don’t need, it’s more defenders.

      And also? This paragraph right here:

      “I always believed that the fundamental cornerstone of HUMAN and WOMEN’S rights is that we should not judge people for something out of their control/how they were born. “White” is just as loaded of a concept as any other race or gender name. Yes, I have white skin, but no, I refuse to have other people tell me how “I” act (giving me a list of offensive things “I” do), and what type of universal privilege “I” have.”

      That paragraph neatly elides the fact that white people DO have a whole lot of privileges that POC simply do not enjoy. It is our responsibility as white people who want to work toward social justice and anti-racism to educate ourselves about the privileges we do have, to take responsibility making things better, and to be accountable for the times that we fuck up. And we probably have – and probably will. fuck. up. Being an ally means recognizing that the thing you did was hurtful (whether you intended it that way or not), apologizing, and educating yourself so that you don’t do it again.

      Finally, it is definitely not our place as white people to be telling POC that something they said in regard to race is incorrect. People of color are experts on racism and racial issues. White people are not. A white person telling a person of color that their opinions about racial issues are unfounded is like a man telling a woman that her experience of sexism is unfounded. Oh, really? Thank you dudebro for explaining to me that not ALL men harass women on the street. From now on I will be very careful to refer to street harassers as genderless beings despite the overwhelming evidence and my appalling lived experience that it’s almost exclusively men who treat me this way.

      Some resources in case you want to learn more:

      White Privilege (Peggy McIntosh):
      http://www.amptoons.com/blog/files/mcintosh.html

      How to Tell People They Sound Racist (Jay Smooth):
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0Ti-gkJiXc

      Link Round up on Anti-Racism, Colorblindness, White Privilege, Derailment, etc:
      http://answerpot.com/showthread.php?3520843-resources+for+anti+racist%2C+social+justice+reflection+and+teaching

      Dear White Feminists:
      http://dearwhitefeminists.wordpress.com/

      Also:
      Dear mods, I know this is an introductory feminist space, but it can’t be pleasant for Sesali and the other POC writing and reading in this space to put up with this kind of thing every time this stuff gets brought up. I realize that this is also asking you to do more, so if the answer is no that’s okay too, but I’m wondering if it might be possible to include commenting guidelines on posts that typically trigger this kind of thing. E.g. “Comments defending white people are off topic for this thread. Please avail yourselves of the plentiful resources online about anti-racism and how to be a good ally.”

      • Posted March 21, 2013 at 1:43 pm | Permalink

        For putting words in my mouth: I am not “defending white people” or trying to get a shout out for potentially being “One of The Good Ones.” I wish I could just peel all the skin off my body, so I could simply make the personal observation about not liking overarching racial-type casting (regardless of what race-color was used in the title of this article), and not get stoned for it.

        And perhaps it was also frustrating, because, although I may “NEVER UNDERSTAND,” I want to try.

        All I wanted to point out was the idea that “The master’s tools will never dismantle the master’s house” and that type-casting hurts/sucks. Thus, I wondered why could this not just be “A short list of ways people can be less oppressive.” I was asking a philosophical question out loud (which may have been overly careless, given the number of relevant contexts that it could be interpreted in)….not asking the author to defend herself, individually.

        I did not intend to “demand that the author defend her words.” I truly am sorry if I made it seem that way. :( I did not mean to add more pain and frustration….so again apologies if that was the primary interpretation.

        And charish, thank you for the book suggestions. I will read them, for sure.

        • Posted March 21, 2013 at 5:37 pm | Permalink

          That’s really good that you want to try to understand and want to learn. Here are some things to consider:

          1. Not intending to do a certain thing or to cause people to feel a certain way, doesn’t mean that you didn’t. This can be hard to really comes to terms with when it’s about yourself and not someone else. We’re raised in society with a criminal justice system that values the intent of the accused over the effect of what they’ve done on the accuser, so we get used to thinking that if someone didn’t *intend* to hurt someone then the person who was hurt shouldn’t complain about being hurt. But that hurt still hurts. And the fact that we didn’t intend to be hurtful doesn’t change the fact that we were. I really recommend that Jay Smooth video for a discussion about the difference between doing something that is racist, and being a racist. If you want to learn and start understanding, you’ve got to start being comfortable with being uncomfortable, and realize that you are definitely going to do unintentionally hurtful things. But if you take responsibility for them and hold yourself accountable, those are things you *did* – they’re not what you *are*.

          2. Racism isn’t just type-casting, stereotyping, or making overarching statements about a particular group. Racism is more than just individual bias towards or against a certain group, although white people are raised to think of it this way. Racism is that bias, plus power, plus privilege. Racism is an institutionalized, society-wide system that values white people over people of color, and gives white people a leg up solely based on their skin color. Frequently, we white people are not even aware that we’re getting that leg up. But we are. There are whole hosts of things that we as white people take for granted that people of color don’t have access to. So when you say that you don’t like ‘overarching racial type casting’ regardless of race – you’re not comparing things that are the same. Making a categorical statement about white people is different from making a categorical statement about people of color because white people, as a category, have power in this society that people of color do not have. Saying that those two statements are the same, or have the same effect, is reminiscent of accusations of “reverse racism.” Reverse racism (“racism” against whites) is false. It cannot exist in a society that gives unearned privileges and power to white people and devalues people of color. I’d really recommend that Peggy McIntosh article for a discussion of how racism is systematic and not just individual acts of bias or meanness.

          3. Unfortunately, the fact is that it *is* white people who do the things that Sesali mentioned. The reason the list can’t be called “a short list of ways *people* can be less oppressive” is because its not just people generally who do this. White people do this. Sure, not all white people. But it doesn’t have to be every single white person before you see a pattern of who does this and who doesn’t. Also, changing the title to say “people” instead of “white people” gives whites the opportunity to think that it’s not about us, it’s about some *other* people who haven’t checked their privilege, not ME. But we do need to think about this. All the time. That’s our responsibility as anti-racist activists who benefit from white privilege.

          Thinking about these things is hard and induces uncomfortableness in white people because we don’t want to think that we’ve been benefiting from a system that hurts others, we don’t want to think that we’ve done hurtful things, and we don’t want to be publicly embarrassed about things we’ve done/said. But push on through that. Do some reading.

          Welcome to anti-racism.

          • Posted March 22, 2013 at 6:11 am | Permalink

            Thank you.

            1. Exactly, and I agree. This stands for everyone, to some basal extent, as long as they identify as being human. It is a dignifying concept as much as it is a responsibility.

            2. Yes. I can see this.

            3. Maybe if we said “Ignorant White Americans,” but yes, not my call to make. I get that. I guess my worldview is just a tad different (reading this article living several months abroad, but as an American). I see that the the US doesn’t “have” to be the way that it is, and it grates me. No place in the world is perfect, but there certainly are places that make more efforts to be better…

            I am not embarrassed! Genuinely confused at times, very regretful to offend someone, and readjusting when needed. But that does not deter me from being eager to learn, in whatever way I can. Sorry to deter or detract from this post in any way that I have!

    • Posted March 20, 2013 at 11:00 pm | Permalink

      I’m also a little surprised that people are getting their knickers in a twist over this. The writer spoke candidly about her experiences as a black woman and now readers want to take that away from her by demanding she defend her words. That’s kind of odd, don’t you think?

      How can you question someone’s individual experiences that they choose to express to you? If you’re not “the other” you can’t really speak of “the other’s” experiences, can you? Like others have already stated: “If this doesn’t apply to you, move on.”

      My god, if blacks can’t tell you how they really feel without worrying and wringing their hands over YOUR feelings, how else can we have a dialogue?

  8. Posted March 20, 2013 at 10:07 am | Permalink

    Speaking of books, people could be reading: “How To Be Black” by Baratunde Thurston, might be a good start. It’s a non threatening approach to understanding blacks without having to ask us uncomfortable questions. As a black woman, I thought this was a fun read.

    Another book, that’s more about black women, is called “Shifting: The Double Lives of Black Women in America.” It’s about the stress and anxiety of being a black woman trying to assimilate into white culture, while keeping it real amongst your own race. It’s a stressful balancing act. I wrote a review for it here:
    http://www.themotleynews.com/2011/12/are-you-shifter.html

    The point is, blacks don’t always have time to be race educators, not every moment can be a teachable one. Taking the time to do the research on your own time would be extremely helpful.

  9. Posted March 20, 2013 at 10:18 am | Permalink

    I too am a white woman aware of my privilege, but I don’t claim to understand it. I am constantly trying to figure out how white privilege has affected me, and how to handle it. I’m not at all saying “ohh its so hard to be white and deal with that” I’m just saying, as you mentioned, it is hard to find and deal with appropriately alllll the ways I’ve been affected by it and figure out how to be better in the future. I want to be an ally to POC especially WOC because I feel like that’s important for all women, even if I’m not quite sure about the appropriate way to go about it. But I don’t like this post. I clicked on it with the hopes that Sesali would offer some honest ideas and advice, if not an “exhaustive list,” from a woman of color on how privileged white women can check their privilege and actually play a positive role here. But I guess, according to Sesali, all we can do is stay out of the way? I just don’t think that’s true. I suppose the point of this post is more about letting WOC know they are not alone in their frustration…. Maybe I don’t like it because I can’t relate to it. But I do wish there was more here, and that there was something I could do. Not because I have a white savior complex but because I agree that we have a long way to go to end oppression. I guess I’ll do my own googling, which, fine. Also, Sesali, whoever touched your hair without your permission is fucking condescending and rude. Yuck.

  10. Posted March 20, 2013 at 9:10 pm | Permalink

    The burden of explanation always falls on the minoritized figure. It’s not fair and it just sucks. I think I’ll weep a bit now. Excellent post, Sesali.

    I’d like to add one — Use your imagination! If anyone were to change the color of their skin for even one month, one’s entire personality would necessarily change simply in response to the way one was treated, which would be wildly different! What traits, fears, desires, might you lose? What might you gain? Ugh.. it’s almost overwhelming… almost.

  11. Posted March 20, 2013 at 11:41 pm | Permalink

    Wow, intense white backlash on this one.

    “You got this? Then please share…”

    I interpreted her statement – and I could very well be wrong – to mean ‘We understand this is happening and are handling it, and it would be less tense without the $0.02 of white people everywhere.’

    The truth is, most white conversations on the violence/misogyny of hip hop neglect to discuss the violence and sexism that are introduced daily into low-income and non-white communities by privileged outsiders (police, juries, teachers, etc.). Very few people question why mainstream culture is so unsupportive of non-stereotypical minority expression (‘Asians can’t be rappers, they’re too busy doing math!’ ‘Black people can’t be good sculptors or painters, they’re too busy being in gangs!’ ‘Mexicans can’t support make films, they’re too busy having big families and eating!’).

    So when white people talk about the violence of hip hop, somewhat constantly, without ever bringing up some important bottom lines to this entire topic, it might be a little tiring and ineffective.

    Additionally, pretty much everyone who knows about hip hop can rattle off strings of songs or artists who don’t fit the angry woman-hating description.

    “Unless you know my entire life story, where I’ve grown up, and what type of social-economic situation I’ve had: sorry, you do not know what type of “privilege” I’ve had—any more than I can truly understand yours.”

    Are you white? You’ve had white privilege. That doesn’t mean you can’t be poor. That doesn’t mean you can’t be from a bad neighborhood going to an underfunded school. It does mean, however, that if you get arrested at any point you’re very likely to get off with a lighter sentence (or no sentence) only because of skin color. This comment is really irrelevant to what this post was about, since it wasn’t a post titled “All White People Are Privileged and CAN NEVER UNDERSTAND.”

    “I have to agree with Bell Hooks on this one”

    ….You mean bell hooks, right? Sorry, I guess this comment’s a bit flamey, but another common thing we white women do (in my observation) is not take the time to recognize non-traditional style choices (leaving out the accent in Quvenzhané, putting the b in bell, etc.).

    “all we can do is stay out of the way?….But I do wish there was more here, and that there was something I could do. ”

    Not sure where she says that we should “stay out of the way.” In fact she gives some proactive suggestions in point two…I must admit I found your post confusing.

    “Comments defending white people are off topic for this thread.”

    Sort of agree except for the most part they aren’t really defending white people, just their own selves.

  12. Posted March 21, 2013 at 4:43 am | Permalink

    Why should a white person be careful about being the one criticizing hip-hop? Because it’s very easy to slip into criticizing the stereotype you have of it in your head, rather than the reality, and that stereotype is quite likely to be a racist one — even if you don’t consider yourself a racist. Since we’re in a racist society, information about black culture that you get from society is likely to be constantly, predictably skewed.

    Second, your criticism is unlikely to be of any quality, because you don’t know a damn thing about what you’re criticizing except that you’ve heard it’s bad, or you’ve had some specific bad examples pointed out to you. Unless you’re actually, for-real knowledgeable about hip-hop, you’re probably not really adding anything novel or new to things.

    Even if you do know what you’re talking about — there’s another danger here. By being a white person criticizing elements of black culture, you’re going to encourage other white people in their bigoted assessment and statements about it. You’re going to encourage the racists to be more vocal. Why can’t they go on about their criticisms of black culture too? After all, you’re doing it. You’re going to find exactly the wrong kind of person in your blog comments, or linking to your post. You might be adding to the problem.

    A fourth issue is that there are already black feminists who are doing a fine job at taking these things apart, with an insider’s knowledge of why and how things have gotten to this point. Not entirely successfully? Of course. Their voices aren’t getting heard very far away.

    So if you’re a white feminist bothered by objectification and misogyny in hip-hop? Help amplify those black voices. Read them. Quote them. Link to them. Encourage other people to read them. Help them financially, if you are able and they are seeking help.

    Also, think a bit more about why it is that the dominant culture chooses to highlight and give a megaphone to precisely the kind of hip-hop that exaggerates negative black stereotypes. Why is that? I believe that considering that question may be quite enlightening — it certainly has been for me.

  13. Posted March 21, 2013 at 2:27 pm | Permalink

    Wow, intense white backlash on this one.

    “You got this? Then please share…”

    At least complete the sentence. I see most corporate music as inherently harmful to women, all women. These stereotypes and misogynistic attitudes prevail in MOST popular music today. If you want to categorize it by hip hop and non hip hop, that’s fine. If you want to look at it closely, there is plenty of conscious hip hop as an alternative as there is pro woman rock out there-what they have in common is that they are seldom heard, as there is very little on the radio that isn’t corporate. This gives me some insight on who is pushing these attitudes on our young in any genre. Rock is actually worse than hip hop at degrading women ie: Nickleback, Stone Temple Pilots. Eminem? He’s one of the worst and I don’t know where to categorize his music. There are too many songs in rock that are about violence committed against women (not to shine a light on it either). If it’s only your bodies being objectified by corporate hip hop and you don’t see a need for any solidarity in this matter, point taken. But to say that it only affect one culture or one race is naive at best. I don’t see how solidarity ever hurt but I see others see it differently.

  14. Posted March 21, 2013 at 2:37 pm | Permalink

    Oh, that was my only disagreement with the article, I just totally disagree that only certain genres are harmful to certain women. They all harm us and undermine us as women.

  15. Posted March 21, 2013 at 4:59 pm | Permalink

    Hey Lara, apologies. I didn’t want to go quoting really long lengths, but I understand how that quote didn’t highlight the point you were making. I guess my response here is: I understand that you don’t like when any ethnic/music/cultural group is sexist, and I think it’s true that a lot of rock, pop, country (!!), etc. are often worse than hip hop.

    Yet, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard parents/feminists/teens/everyone in the white community talk about how awful hip hop is. My opinion is that we should redirect these conversations to music to which we DO listen; white feminists do not do a proportionate amount of this. Which you seem to…so I’m sorry for responding as I did.

  16. Posted March 23, 2013 at 8:56 pm | Permalink

    I have to say before I write any further that I am sincerely asking this question and not trying to play devil’s advocate or appear insensitive. I realize that there is probably a very valid answer that I just don’t see, so I’m hoping to get some perspective on it.

    To your point about critiquing hip hop, I hear what you’re saying. I am a white woman, and I listen to a lot of hip hop. I sometimes write about it (both positively and negatively) though I try not to speak on specifically racialized elements of it (while fully recognizing that the treatment of it by many mainstream discussions is often fully racist). I enjoy hip hop, and I like writing about what I know. I also write about a lot of alternative and indie rock, again, because that’s what I listen to.

    What I want to know is why is this different than the white feminists who said they stayed silent on The Onion tweet about Quvenzhane’ Wallis because they felt that it wasn’t their place to comment? I completely disagreed with that. I thought that it was everyone’s responsibility to stand up against that misogyny. But if you’re asking white women not to comment on the misogyny in hip hop because it should be handled exclusively by people of color, how is it not the same for that tweet? Where are the lines about when it’s an act of misogyny everyone should comment on and one that is exclusive territory?

  17. J
    Posted March 27, 2013 at 4:59 am | Permalink

    I find parts of this post to be damaging and alienating. Saying that white women should not criticize misogyny in hip-hop because it is not their bodies being exploited makes no sense to me. By that logic, a person who is not a rape victim should not be allowed to be outraged by rape because its not “their bodies that were being exploited.”
    Criticizing is not the same as assuming you know the experiences and feelings of those who have been directly affected.
    Hip hop is part of popular culture (like it or not), many diverse people are exposed to it or listen to it, and it has the potential to effect all of those people and their views on women and acceptable sexual behavior.
    I would hope it is not only “white” feminists who will push back on this issue.
    I often see men who have good intentions attempt to talk to me about feminism but are intimidated because they are afraid I will tell them they have no business weighing in on what they perceive to be women’s issues. I try my best to correct this misconception. These are issues that affect us all as humans, across all boundaries and lines. To alienate anyone from the discussion of misogyny in any of its forms based on their race or sex defeats the purpose.
    On a side note, I believe that intentions make all the difference in the world. We can not control outcomes or other people’s perceptions, all we have control over are our intentions.

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