Viral misogyny alert: “The Women of LA”

Ugh. The Nice Guys of OKCupid “DJ Lubel”–the guy behind the Murray Hill video from 2009–has released a new spoof music video, “The Women of LA,” complaining about how bitchy women won’t provide the sex he and his friends deserve. The clip is so awful for so many reasons that I don’t know how to levy a real critique, but here are some highlights:

  • The entire video is based on the premise that women owe men sex, and that if a guy isn’t getting laid, it’s obviously because of the ladies’ flaws, rather than his own. We’ve been over this before.
  • Despite the DJ’s desperation to convince one woman to sleep with him, he expresses nothing but disdain for the whole female population of LA. Apparently these bitches “all look the same,” are greedy and materialistic but financially dependent on their parents, and care about nothing but wealth and fame in a partner. But still, this guy really, really wants to fuck one of you (because men are allowed to be shallow, even though women are not).
  • The video singles out Iranian women for special stereotyping, adding a dose of racism to make sure the overwhelming misogyny isn’t monotonous.
  • At multiple points, men bemoan the sobriety of LA women since “one wine’s not enough to get between their thighs.” Apparently the idea of sleeping with a woman who wouldn’t get into bed while sober doesn’t bother this crew.
  • Part of the video is a spoof of RENT. Because comparing not getting laid because you’re a jerk to dying of AIDS sounds like a great idea, right?
  • Keep an eye out for some requisite body shaming. The skinny girls won’t sleep with these guys, but the idea of sex with a heavier woman from the Valley is assumed to be laughable, as is sex with a drag queen.
The Women of LA

Don’t bother watching the video. Really.

To the inevitable trolls: “it’s just supposed to be funny” isn’t an excuse for this. That defense is disrespectful to comedy, since it’s based on the presumption that humor has no relation to reality, and fundamentally misunderstands bigotry. Most people don’t set out to be sexist, but that doesn’t mean their words and actions don’t perpetuate harmful beliefs about gender and sexuality.

New Haven, CT

Alexandra Brodsky is an editor at, student at Yale Law School, and founding co-director of Know Your IX, a national legal education campaign against campus gender-based violence. Alexandra has written for publications including the New York Times, the Atlantic, the Guardian, and the Nation, and she has spoken about violence against women and reproductive justice on MSNBC, ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, FOX, and NPR. Through Know Your IX, she has organized with students across the country to build campuses free from discrimination and violence, developed federal policy on Title IX enforcement, and has testified at the Senate. At Yale Law, Alexandra focuses on antidiscrimination law and is a member of the Veterans Legal Services Clinic. Alexandra is committed to developing and strengthening responses to gender-based violence outside the criminal justice system through writing, organizing, and the law. Keep an eye out for The Feminist Utopia Project, co-edited by Alexandra and forthcoming from the Feminist Press (2015).

Alexandra Brodsky is an editor at, student at Yale Law School, and founding co-director of Know Your IX.

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  • Andrew

    Sigh. That video even stars JALEEL WHITE (yes Steve Urkel from Family Matters) of all people.

    And the video has 8,616 likes and 838 dislikes on YouTube. In a society that actually understood that women are people, I think there’d be 2,000 likes to 6,000 dislikes.

    I understand why you don’t want to embed the video, but I think the reading audience of this blog should head to the video en masse & click “dislike”.

    At least other comedians are dissing the video, as Hollywood Reporter found.

  • Amy Hawthorne

    I’m going to damn this with faint defense, I thought it was fairly funny (though I think half of what I found funny was mostly unintentional)

    First off , I think the sense of entitlement underlying the whole concept is hilarious because it’s super accurate. Guys move to LA and can’t understand why women 10 times better looking than them (or than any girl who ever gave them the time of day anywhere else) and who can select from a dating pool of similarly insanely hot men don’t want to go out with them based on their other qualities when they’re only pursuing these women for their looks in the first place. There’s some hints that DJ gets that at least a little.

    Second, the majority of these depictions of LA women are barely caricatures, they’re sadly pretty accurate reflections of 10-20% of the women running around this city. I think it’s just as valid to call out women who thrive on and perpetuate a misogynistic culture as the men who do so. Again, probably DJ’s intention wasn’t as feminist as all that, but that doesn’t invalidate the whole thing.

    The worst part is the Persian girls section. It’s so gratuitously hacky and lazy, it’s not remotely funny, which does just leave it out there as nakedly racist.

  • Richard

    Where to begin?
    Well, let’s start with the people who are actually in the video which includes, *gasp*
    women who of their free will participated in the creation of this video.

    “The weather is amazing and the rent’s cheap, but no one is having sex in LA”.
    OK, this is obviously a New Yorker’s view point, as later pointed out in the video where
    the guy happens to have enough game to get a girl in NY.

    I used to work on the Universal Studios lot for a non-profit that was given space there.
    (We’ve since relocated to USC).

    It was in the same building that they often did casting in. When I would leave for lunch
    I would sometimes see groups of very similar people; hardly a surprise because they are
    obviously looking for someone for a role.

    Anyway, sometimes when I was walking through I would see a group of attractive women.
    A number of them inevitable started trying to be friendly with me. Now if I had encountered
    these women outside this environment, I would not even have been noticed by them, let
    alone attempt to spark up a conversation.

    Are all attractive women in LA like this? Of course not. Have I gone to places where I have
    seen women acting like the women in the video? Yes. Did I watch a bunch of guys trying every method they could to impress the women. Yes. I don’t have much sympathy for
    either group.

    In the end, this video is both about “hating” on the LA women as well as self loathing by the
    New Yorkers who are used to a significant advantage in meeting women there for one night
    stands. There I guess there must be a significant shortage of men or something. *shrug*