Imagine the “War on Men”

A SYTYCB post.

On his nationally broadcast show, Univision America talk radio host Fernando Espuelas (sarcastically) called for a governmental regulation of the male reproductive anatomy, in response to the governmental meddling in women’s bodies. Espuelas posted the following to his Facebook and Twitter accounts: “As per my show today, I am officially proposing the 2012 Control of Testicles Act to make sure our Government has authority over a precious national resource.”  If we’re going to regulate bodies (or exercise biopower, as Foucault would put it), we should regulate ‘em all right?* So taking a cue from Espuelas, let’s imagine what a War on Men would look like…

[enter movie-like hazy nightmare sequence, with the famous theme from the shower scene in Psycho playing in the background]

What if female politicians decided it was the government’s right to regulate men’s sexual lives and reproductive decisions? Imagine Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann, fill in the blank, calling for a ban on condoms. Every time a condom is successfully used, it prevents sperm from fertilizing an egg,  just like those diabolical whore pills! Never mind the fact that condoms are also used to protect individuals from sexually transmitted diseases, (just like The Pill is used to regulate hormonal imbalances, irregular periods, treat ovarian cysts, and can reduce the risk of ovarian cancer). If you’re having pre-marital, non-reproductive sex, contracting STDs is a risk you take, and a consequence you should accept, you man-whore!

What if there was a possibility of male masturbation becoming a crime? Every time a man ejaculates, hundreds of millions of potential fetuses are lost. Wasted. Dead. Where is the respect for the sanctity of life there?

What if, instead of the proposed criminalization of miscarriages, there was a criminalization of wet dreams? Because again, there is a loss of hundreds of millions of potential babies. 

What if the male body was not seen as simply, the male body, but as a sperm-producing factory? What if the male body’s natural ability to produce sperm, trumped, in the government’s eyes, rights to healthcare? What if men living with cancer were denied chemotherapy because it causes sperm cell mutations and lowers sperm count? (The chemo is killing off potential babies!!!)

What if the government allowed a man’s employer to deny the insurance coverage for a vasectomy?

What if states throughout the country were regulating how, when, and if, a man could have a vasectomy?

What if checkout clerks at drug stores could refuse service to a man buying condoms if it went against her/his/zir moral and or religious beliefs?

What if there was a governmental proposal for penile probes?

And the list goes on, and on, and on…

[end nightmare sequence]

Sounds absurd doesn’t it? However, the absurd thing is that for women, this is not simply an imaginary horror movie sequence. It is a real-life nightmare. So until our health and rights are respected and acknowledged, and we are seen for more than our magical baby-birthing abilities, the screeching Psycho violins will continue.

[resume nightmare sequence]

*To clarify, I am not calling for a regulation on any bodies. Post is meant to be sarcastic.

 

 

Disclaimer: This post was written by a Feministing Community user and does not necessarily reflect the views of any Feministing columnist, editor, or executive director.

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