The hottest new beautification product will transform you, completely.

Fotoshop by Adobé from Jesse Rosten on Vimeo.

Why is it so effective? Because it is not real, it is a computer program that has been used for years to alter the way real women look. These avatars have become our global standard of beauty.

(If someone wants to make a transcript of this, I will love you forever.)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKz1WgyFAcw

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8 Comments

  1. Posted January 11, 2012 at 11:26 am | Permalink

    Transcript:
    [funky, hip music] [sexy, intense, female voiceover] Introducing the next revolution in beauty. Get ready to experience a whole new you.

    [model] It’s you, perfected.

    [voiceover] Say goodbye to fine lines and wrinkles and hello to full lips, sparkling eyes, and lashes that never end. And that’s just the beginning!

    Transform your look the way celebrities do with this beauty industry secret that’s now available for the first time ever. Introducing fotoshop by Adobé [pronounced ah-doe-bay]. Finally look the way you’ve always dreamed. The difference is clear.

    Just one application of fotoshop gives you results so dramatic they’re almost unreal (istic). Use healing brush to target blemishes at their source by simply erasing them. [rushed voice] Pro-pixel intensifying fauxtanical hydro-jargon microbead extract infused with nutritive volumizing technology [normal voice] will leave your face virtually unrecognizable.

    [model] My skin feels like plastic!

    [voiceover] Take control of your color with hue/saturation. Use this breakthrough formula to change hair or skin color, brighten eyes, whiten teeth, even adjust your race!

    Tired of fighting with your shape? Wish you could be a total knockout? Dial in the perfect you with liquefy. Reshape your body without the expense and mess of surgery. Why eat healthy and exercise when you can just look like you do? And the best part is [model] it won’t rub off.

    [voiceover] The results don’t lie. Pictures like this are all fotoshop. The celebrity beauty secret used in virtually every major magazine is now available to you. You don’t have to rely on a healthy body image or self-respect any more.

    [model] Now that’s the power of fotoshop.

    [voiceover] There’s only one way to look like a real cover girl: fotoshop by Adobé. [model]Maybe she’s born with it. [voiceover] Uh, no, pretty sure it’s fotoshop.

    Haven’t had time to make a fully descriptive/alt text version, but this is all of the text, anyway.

    However, if you are unable to view the video, a quick and non-time-synched version is given below. I apologize if I use inappropriate or offensive descriptors for any of the women described; please let me know if I do (I’m a bit new to descriptive video).

    There are a variety of conventionally attractive women (presenting as cis women), some who appear white, and others who appear to be women of color. They are all slender and the video is shot to make them look tall. They have long hair and are wearing clothing that is conventionally considered fashionable and feminine (skirts, dresses, high heels, etc). They are moving as if posing for a fashion photo shoot (in front of a colored background, with wind blowing their hair around their faces, in poses considered traditionally “sexy”). As the product’s features are described, photos of the feature being used are shown (e.g., when the “heal” feature is used, a closeup of a woman’s mouth and jaw is shown with an area of rough skin, which is removed and replaced with smooth skin). When the major magazines are discussed, cover shots of those magazines (including Vogue, Cosmopolitan, and several others) are shown, with the cover models’ photos shown both before and after photoshopping. The photoshopping shown involves slimming, shaping, and re-coloring the models (in one frame, a darker-skinned black woman on a cover is shown having her skin lightened considerably). During the discussion of the liquefy feature, a presumably cis, slender, white woman wearing exercise gear and boxing gloves is shown performing kickboxing moves; at one point, she accidentally hits some furniture and almost knocks it over, and then looks embarrassed.

    • Posted January 11, 2012 at 12:38 pm | Permalink

      Yours was much better. I bow to your superior transcription skills. :)

  2. Posted January 11, 2012 at 11:55 am | Permalink

    I was watching a great documentary a couple of months ago about human representation in art. It’s thesis, which I found very convincing, was that there is no true representation of people in art. Everything from ancient sculpture to modern photography has been idealized and stylized in one form or another.

    I know there are some who are trying to argue that photoshop and digital image alteration should be eliminated so that we can see “real” people. The recent campaign by whatever makeup company that’s trying to promote the “real beauty” (through heavy use of their products, of course) idea is pushing this pretty hard.

    I think that’s going about it the wrong way. We should encourage more photoshop, and always assume that the images we see are stylized rather than real. The problem isn’t that the supposedly “real” photographs and videos are being altered into something that is unreal. The problem is that we consider photographs and videos to be real in the first place. They never have been, and they never will be. More photoshop (and more awareness of photoshop) will help break the false association we have that photographs and videos are somehow real and accurate representations of people. (After all, even if an image is completely unaltered after it was taken, it is still a stylized representation.)

    When it becomes normal in our culture to look at a photographic image of a person the same way someone in an earlier time might look at an oil painting of some person, it will go a long way towards breaking the unrealistic expectations that are put upon us.

    So I say more photoshop, and more videos like this to remind us just how pervasive photoshop is.

    Now, there’s also the issue of what exactly the photographs are being stylized into with photoshop, but that’s an even bigger discussion about social beauty standards that I can’t get into without spending far too much of my work day typing here…

  3. Posted January 11, 2012 at 12:03 pm | Permalink

    Introducing, the next revolution in beauty! Get ready to experience a whole new you!
    [Model] “It’s you, perfected!”
    Say goodbye to fine lines and wrinkles and hello to full lips, sparkling eyes and lashes that never end. And that’s just the beginning. Transform your look the way celebrities do with this beauty industry secret that’s now available for the first time ever. Introducing Fotoshop by Adobe.
    Finally look the way you’ve always dreamed. The difference is clear. Just one application of Fotoshop can give you results so dramatic, they’re almost unreal…listic. Use Healing Brush to target blemishes at their source by simply erasing them. Pro-pixel intensifying fauxtanical hydro-jargon microbead extract infused with nutritive volumizing technology will leave your face virtually unrecognizable.
    [Model] “My skin feels like plastic!”
    Take control of your color with Hue Saturation. Use this breakthrough formula to change hair or skin color, brighten eyes, whiten teeth, even adjust your race.
    Tired of fighting with your shape? Wish you could be a total knockout? Dial in the perfect you with Liquify. Reshape your body without the expense and mess of surgery. Why eat healthy and exercise when you can just look like you do? And the best part is…
    [Model] “It won’t rub off!”
    The results don’t lie. Pictures like this are all Fotoshop. The celebrity beauty secret used in virtually every major magazine is now available to you. You don’t have to rely on a healthy body image or self-respect anymore. “Now that’s the power of Fotoshop!”
    There’s only one way to look like a real Covergirl: Fotoshop by Adobe.
    “Maybe she’s born with it.” Uhhh, nah, I’m pretty sure it’s Fotoshop.

  4. Posted January 11, 2012 at 1:06 pm | Permalink

    I like the message in this video except for the “why eat healthy and exercise when you can just look like you do?” bit. It doesn’t fit the tone of the rest of the video. It seems to be saying that we are just too lazy and gluttonous to try hard enough to be pretty.

    • Posted January 12, 2012 at 3:47 am | Permalink

      I read it differently- it’s saying we should eat right and exercise for our health, and not care about if we fit some social standard of thin or beautiful. It was accusing society and those who use that photoshop feature of caring more about whether someone looks fit than whether they are healthy and happy.

    • Posted January 12, 2012 at 8:23 am | Permalink

      I think what they were going for was “the only reason to be healthy is because it makes you look pretty, and since fotoshop takes care of that, you don’t need to take care of yourself! Who cares if you’re healthy? It’s TOTES more important to be HOT.” ^.-

      *shiver*

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