“Sarah Palin, Riot Grrrl”: LOL STFU GTFO

Originally posted by Caitlin Grant at Paradigm Shift NYC, a spectacular feminist blog.

An open letter to The Atlantic in response to Elizabeth Wurtzel’s recent piece:“Sarah Palin, Riot Grrrl”

Dear Atlantic,

R U SRS?

At first I was able to brush off conservative appropriation of feminism as laughable attempts at garnering legitimacy in terms of sex equality. Most conservative attempts at hijacking feminism, like Sarah Palin’s mama grizzly campaign, appeared to me as nothing more than asinine, self-congratulating publicity stunts. Politically conservative women have often thought of themselves as America’s unsung superheroes, silently restoring Amurikah to its Puritanical roots.

But riot grrrl? Sarah Palin? I just… I can’t even. Too far, Atlantic, way too far. The author of this Palin-celebrating article, Elizabeth Wurtzel, describes herself as a “liberal feminist” who “like[s] Palin,” but doesn’t “agree with a word [she] says.” WTFs were indeed had by all.

Wurtzel states that Sarah Palin represents feminist ideals because she is a “visible working mother and female politician” who “puts up with less crap” than other women. Um, OK that’s all well and good, but LISTEN: a woman in power does not a feminist make. Just because Palin had political power does not mean that she did right by all the women she governed.

Sarah Palin is not a feminist. For the love of Gloria Steinem, please stop stating otherwise. Palin is anti-choice; she opposes abortion even in the case of rape and incest (and made Alaskans pay for their own rape kits!), and seeks to overturn Roe v. Wade. Nothing says sisterhood like campaigning to take away another woman’s reproductive autonomy, amirite, ladies?

Sarah Palin also opposes same-sex marriage. As a feminist, I personally ADORE when government officials tell me whom I should love, and police my sexual practices. NOT. Don’t do that – it’s antifeminist to ask those you govern to adhere to antiquated heteronormative coupling standards.

Perhaps the most LOL-inspiring part of this article, though, is when the Wurtzel states, that Palin’s tough-gal-moose-shootin’-dumber-than-rocks-but-sweeter-than-pie lovability pales in comparison to her sheer hotness. Palin’s status as a MILF is apparently her most redeeming political quality. “Sarah Palin is hot. She has sex appeal. That’s why people like her. That’s the whole story” (emphasis mine).

My, my, Atlantic, things are sounding fishy. This author dubs herself a feminist, yet clings to the outdated belief that a woman’s most valuable asset is her looks. Wurtzel goes on to list some of Fox News’ “babes” of the Right, citing their [white, thin, male-gaze-inspired] hotness as a cornerstone of conservative success, and suggests that the Left should follow suit. Wurtzel has the secret, ya’ll! People will start taking women seriously if they are traditionally beautiful!

Listen, I hope this shit is a joke, Atlantic. Sarah Palin is not a feminist, and as a Disciple of Kathleen Hanna, I take personal offense to you bestowing upon her the coveted title of riot grrrl. Riot grrrls are patriarchy-smashing, empowerment-seeking feminist punk badasses. Sarah Palin is not allowed in the club. YOU CAN’T SIT WITH US!

Love,

Caitlin

xoxo