Stuff Screenwriters Like: Quirky Dream Girl

Oh, the darling of modern film and television, the stuff of shy male fantasy. Screenwriters employ this cinematic convention in romantic comedies so often that by now she’s pretty easy to spot.

She’s youthful. She’s playful. She’s knowledgeable about semi-obscure indie rock. She’s cute in a totally trendy-but-alternative way. She’s probably a little damaged and a lot kooky. And most importantly, she’s worth battling 7 evil exes over. This mostly supporting, rarely leading role is a MacGuff(in) of sorts, pushing the hero (aka Lovesick Guy) toward his ultimate goal and arc.

She’s easily recognized in scripts and productions by five basic characteristics…


1. NAME

The Quirky Dream Girl’s signifier immediately conveys that we’re not dealing with your average alt-cutie. Her name falls somewhere on a Venn diagram like this:

2. HAIR

While the hair styling of the Girl may fall under the jurisdiction of art direction and wardrobe, it’s important to note that the lady’s coif speaks volumes about her free spiritedness. Take Aria of “Pretty Little Liars.” I see an Avril pink streak in her flashbacks, and I know all I need to about her counter-cultural past.

Kate Winslet in "Eternal Sunshine," Natalie Portman in "Garden State," Kristen Bell in "Veronica Mars," Ellen Page in "Juno," Anna Friel in "Pushing Daisies," Zooey Deschanel in "(500) Days of Summer," Lizzy Caplan in "Party Down," and Mary Elizabeth Winstead in "Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World"

Bangs are perhaps the most telling physical element of crafting a Quirky Girl, especially if she insists on keeping the rest of her hair mainstream long. Fringe makes a face way more interesting, right? Right? Because there is literally no other reason for doing that to Janis Ian‘s forehead.

If not bangs, then braids or pig tails will suffice. If not that, then some sort of equally childish head wear. Some screenwriters are not above putting the Quirky Girl in a helmet for a significant portion of screen time. Brunettes are preferable, because obviously they’re more deep than blonde counterparts. I’ve included blondie Veronica Mars in the chart above, if only because the flashbacks to long-haired, bangless, layerless Veronica create a stark contrast to her sharper, spunkier, more pig tail-frequent present day image. Plus, she rocks a lot of hoodies and stripes (see below: “Style”). If the screenwriters are really edgy, they give the Girl and ever-changing array of neon dye jobs.

It’s also worth noting the actress who plays the Quirky Girl will probably have had a boy hair cut at some point her career.

3. STYLE

Style for the Quriky Dream Girl is only second to hair in establishing her identity and general differentness. Sometimes screenwriters even try to trick us into thinking Jennifer Aniston is not vanilla ALL the time by dressing her up like Anna/Seth from “The O.C.” (But alas, beanies and scarves can only do so much).

When done more effectively, the Girl’s style conveys that she’s accessibly down-to-earth yet impossibly original. Naturally, there are costume formulas for such individuality. Quirky Dream Girl style falls into two clearly defined categories: sorta masculine or uber girly. Either way, it’s juvenile.

The boyish uniform consists of stripes, plaid, bright mismatched colors, scarfs, jeans, argyle, sneakers, vests, and the all-important HOODIE.

Eternal Sunshine, Garden State, Juno

The more feminine look is the exact opposite on everything, except maybe color. If the girly quirkster does wear color, it’s super matchy, and accompanied by bows, ruffles, dresses, heels, gloves, cat-eye glasses, hats, and whatever else Blair Waldorf’s magic vintage dress-up box threw up.

Regardless of style gender, the Quirky Dream Girl must LAYER and ACCESSORIZE. The character will doubtless inspire a slew of Polyvore.com sets and probably garner other blogger style guides dedicated to her.

4. MUSICAL PROCLIVITY

If anything conveys the distinctive depth of a girl’s soul it’s her entirely unique claim to loving music. She loves it so much that screenwriters often make it an essential part of the central relationship, ensuring a movie soundtrack certain to be offered in LP form next to the green nail polish at Urban Outfitters. It might even be so profound that Frou Frou ends up as your male roommate‘s ringtone, which inevitably goes off in the middle of yoga class, and which inevitably everyone assumes is yours.

(500) Days of Summer, Garden State, Juno

In fact, said soundtracks are usually associated with the meet-cute:

See Garden State.  And (500) Days of Summer.

She’s literally, like, the guy’s musical soul mate.

If no access to antiquated headphones (please, like iPod earbuds have character) is readily available, then perhaps the Girl will sing. Maybe as an essential part of clarifying that her name is Clementine. Which leads me to number 5.

5. LOVE PROWESS

The Girl is ALWAYS the aggressor of her relationship. This is largely due to the fact that the men she likes are unfailingly nerdy wallflowers too sheepish to make the first move. More so, sometimes they are outright uninterested in making conversation. I mean, he’s obviously busy FILLING OUT SOME FORMS. But much like Asberger’s patients, some Quirky Girls fail to understand social cues, and force themselves into association with the movie’s hero without any delicacy or grace.

Eternal Sunshine, Garden State, Pushing Daisies, Juno

Other Girls may be slightly more perceptive and read between the lines of a “No, I only like you as a friend” or an I-love-you postcard passed Spanish class to see that the guy really does want her bad, but is too meek to spit any serious game. The Girl is responsible for getting things sexy, and then even reminding the guy that it wasn’t his idea.

BUT no matter how hesitant the guy is in his initial approach, he romanticizes the precious hipster out the girl. And justifiably, because she dresses like she’s from the 60s! And she likes MUSIC, remember?! Still, sometimes he is left bitterly disappointed. And I know that Juno, Veronica Mars, and Casey also have dry wit and exceptional maturity levels to recommend themselves, but ironically these are the only archetypal ladies I’ve written about not treated to a grand gesture like a brain swipe or spontaneous song and dance number or an unholy RESURRECTION.

Bonus Quirk Points–generally, indicative of better written characters–are awarded for overall misanthropy, sarcasm, and snarkage. The funnier Quirky Girls possess an acerbic self-aware self-awareness (squared). Casey of “Party Down” is nearly parody, except there’s a whole meta actor complex in which she knows she plays the type. And she’s great.

RIP “Party Down.”

Disclaimer: This post was written by a Feministing Community user and does not necessarily reflect the views of any Feministing columnist, editor, or executive director.

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