Dr. Laura Reminds Us Who’s the Boss

You may already know we’re not the biggest fan of Dr. Laura, but she just keeps coming back to piss us off.

The Sexist covered her most recent video chat, addressing a question by a listener about stay-at-home dads. Her response? That being the family’s breadwinner could lead these women to extreme emasculation (sounds like a good band name) of their men:

[W]hen the moms are working, and the dads are at home, the moms, the women, the wives, tend to change their feelings somewhat about their husbands. They tend not to see them as the heroes. The warrior. The man. The caretaker. The provider. The protector. And those feelings are really very significant. And I have found over the years that there often is more marital strife when the roles are reserved. Whether you’re a feminist or not, whether you like it or not, them’s just the facts.

Apparently she didn’t get the memo that this isn’t 1950 and we’re not in a Disney movie. But the doctor makes sure to say it’s a-okay if you want to be a working mother, as long as you still know your place:

Now: it often works very well. And when it works very well–OK, when it works very well it’s good for the kids, when it doesn’t work very well, it’s not good for the kids. The point is not, are the rolls reversed and is that good for the children? The point is, are the parents RHHHHGGG about it? Is dad being treated with less respect? Is mom coming home sort of bitter that she’s not with the kids, and feeling like since she earns the money, she’s the boss? If there is this kind of negativity and dissention, that hurts the kids.

Mom can’t be having, you know, too much respect or anything! Amanda says, “In other words, are you still treating mom like a woman (with less respect), and dad like a man (the boss)? You’re good to go.” Indeed. If anyone needs advice, it’s Dr. Laura — on what year it is.
Approximate transcript after the jump.

I’m Dr, Laura, welcome to our YouTube channel, and we got a letter here from Karen: If a mom works and the dad stays home with the children, does this have any psychological effect on the kids with respect to their relationships later in life? You talk a lot about stay-at-home moms but I don’t recall you talking much about what happens when the roles are reversed. Is it better for boys if the dad stays home or does it matter? This is one which gets very sensitive, because in general–that means there are exceptions everywhere, OK–when the moms are working, and the dads are at home, the moms, the women, the wives, tend to change their feelings somewhat about their husbands. They tend not to see them as the heroes. The warrior. The man. The caretaker. The provider. The protector. And those feelings are really very significant. And I have found over the years that there often is more marital strife when the roles are reserved. Whether you’re a feminist or not, whether you like it or not, them’s just the facts. Now: it often works very well. And when it works very well–OK, when it works very well it’s good for the kids, when it doesn’t work very well, it’s not good for the kids. The point is not, are the rolls reversed and is that good for the children? The point is, are the parents RHHHHGGG about it? Is dad being treated with less respect? Is mom coming home sort of bitter that she’s not with the kids, and feeling like since she earns the money, she’s the boss? If there is this kind of negativity and dissention, that hurts the kids. But the families where there is role reversal, it doesn’t seem to matter for the future for the kids, the boys could see this and still decide you want to be the person who goes out to work. So the real issue is how do mom and dad treat each other. Do they show each other love, patience, compassion and schmooziness, or not – that’s what makes a difference for the kids, not who’s bringing home the bacon – or who’s frying it, whatever that is.