Ask Professor Foxy: How Do I Become Comfortable with My Inverted Nipples?

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Hello Professor Foxy,
I know I’ve heard of a lot of women having this problem but I was wondering what you thought about it. Or if it’s even a problem.. I guess it’s really not.
Anyway, I have inverted nipples and I’m extremely shy about my breasts because of it. Which is a problem, because other than that, I am pretty confident with my body. I just feel embarrassed because I feel like it makes my breasts look strange and I almost always cover them if I’m naked besides the rare once in a while chance that I feel they look normal. Since I have pretty big breasts (34D) I feel that that makes it even more awkward looking. I mean sometimes I feel like they look like craters! (even though that’s exaggerating) I’m definitely against plastic surgery so I would probably never get it fixed that way.
I was just wondering if it’s normal or how other people feel about having inverted nipples? It also sucks that when a guy can’t make my nipples hard they often ignore my breasts during foreplay which is frustrating because that’s an area that is actually really sensitive and I don’t even want to address the fact that my boobs aren’t normal to my boyfriend because I feel like he’d pay more attention to it. Also, I was wondering if many people that have inverted nipples get them pierced and if you would recommend it?
Thank you,
Shy About Inverted Nipples
Hello Shy –
Things are a problem, if they are a problem for you. If a part of your body makes you uncomfortable, it matters.
Both men and women have inverted nipples. Breasts are different on everybody: size, shape, aerola and nipple size, color, heft, etc. Around 20 percent of women have at least one inverted nipple. (That’s right, people can have one inverted and one not).
The important thing about this is to claim them. They are a part of you and if you can find them hot others will follow. As a sex educator, people constantly talk to me about the parts of their bodies that they hate. My response is pretty consistent “people are just glad to be in bed with you. No one is judging your body more than you are.”
As for guys ignoring your breasts, the only way to get what you want in bed is to ask for it. Move your lover’s hands to your breasts and moan. Erect nipples are just one way we have of showing our lovers what we like, our linguistic and verbal cues and how our body moves are equally if not more important.
Some people with inverted nipples do get them pierced and while there are no great studies, for some people this actually does cause the nipple to stand out even after the piercing is removed. If you decide to go this route, I would carefully choose a piercer who has experience piercing inverted nipples. Call around and find someone who will answer your questions honestly. Piercing causes scar tissue to form and this may impact your sensitivity (for better or worse) or your ability to breastfeed (if you want to have children and breast feed).
I would try the owning route first. See how it feels to try and love and accepting your body as is and projecting that to lovers. Give it time and see if you can start to truly love what you have.
Best,
Professor Foxy
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