Target Women: Laundry

This is a good one, folks!

An extra Haskins treat after the jump on “Cougars.”

Join the Conversation

  • Dor

    I [HEART] SARAH HASKINS!!!!

  • EGhead

    Why isn’t she my best friend already? Seriously, Sarah, we need to hang out. Call me.

  • Renee

    I was going to content myself to speaking out on my blog but for fuck sakes Feministing editors, as great as Sarah Hakins is, it is disgusting that reporting on her videos once again takes prescience over violence aimed at POC.
    I can see that today is not Samhita’s turn to blog but would it really hurt you to acknowledge the death of a young black man by taser? Would it really hurt you to acknowledge the grief of his black mother (year thar’s right a WOC) is suffering unimaginable pain..OOOPs s’cuse me, I once again forgot that unless it involves the pain and suffering of white motherhood, it is is not a feminist issue. Silence like this is exactly why WOC reject feminism.

  • Ann

    I agree with you that taser violence (and Renea Mitchell’s grief) are most certainly feminist issues. But with all due respect, I don’t think it is accurate to say that this video takes precedence over issues of violence against POC. This post, while admittedly light-hearted and frivolous, is on the homepage between a post on the cultural genocide of Native people and one on the deaths of two prominent scholars of race, history, and ethnicity. It is true that we haven’t done a good job covering the issue of taser violence. But saying we are ignoring issues of violence except those that involve suffering white mothers is, I feel, an inaccurate characterization.

  • argolis

    YOu do know that right now at least four of the ten stories on the front page address WOC and/or immigrant issues?

  • Renee

    @Anne well I’ll be fair to you then…I will just ignore that time after time when MOC are subject to police violence, feministing is either slow to post or does not post at all. To me that counts as privileging the experiences of white women and white mothers. It is offensive to see Sarah Haskins getting such attention while we know that a black mother is crying with grief. Oh before you twist any further take the time consider Feminstings excellent coverage of Sean Bell (yep full snark there)
    I further notice that one of the posts you hold up so proudly as an an example of your intersectional approach was written by the Feminsting community and not a feministing editor. Sorry you don’t get to take credit for having the decency to highlight someone elses work because you failed to do your own.

  • Lydia Encyclopedia

    I love Sarah! I watched the laundry one with my mum, she and I both cracked up, especially me, I was just commenting yesterday, “I can’t wait to see what Sarah Haskins does with laundry commercials.”

  • Ann

    Thanks for the input!

  • msmolly

    The only thing that I don’t like about this post is seeing two of her videos at once means that it’ll probably be a while before we get another one! I wish she did them more often/live streaming all the time. Because I seriously cannot get enough.

  • Shinobi

    I am very amused by the Olay Regenerist commercial that followed that Laundry video.
    Way to totally miss the point advertising execs! Woo!

  • ElleStar

    Admittedly, I don’t have my finger on the pulse of the current news. I find a lot of what interests me through blogs and message boards. I haven’t heard anything about the article you mentioned before you brought it up.
    Does that article belong on Feministing? Sure. But why not alert the authors to news (in case they hadn’t heard about it, either), or, better yet, write your own post about it in the community section?
    I like Sarah Haskin’s Target Women posts. I don’t think that there is a limited amount of blog space here. It’s not as though this entry is using up another potential entry.

  • dianita

    I love it when ppl stare ay my male partner in the grocery store bc he is sniffing away at laundry detergents. I love it that he does our laundry!

  • FlamingBiatch

    lol, “look out, current 9 year olds. RAWR.”
    And geez, I like the humor. When you are a feminist, sometimes all the injustice really makes it seem like a crapsack world. We need Sarah. Plus, so much “humor” has misogynistic undertones, so it’s hard to find truly funny, feminist humor. I don’t mean to marginalize any more serious concerns, but the Sarah Haskins post is not the place to address concerns over disparities.

  • Ruby

    As ElleStar already pointed out, blog space is not a limited resource. Just because they posted the Sarah Haskins videos doesn’t mean that they’ve automatically lost all opportunity to blog about something else. I also had not heard about the story you mentioned until you brought it up. It would have been much more productive for you to email the bloggers at feministing informing them of that story, or to say it respectfully here in the comments, or to [gasp] blog about it yourself.
    It’s totally counterproductive and silly to insintuate that the bloggers at feministing are racist, lazy, or intentionally overlooking the grief of a WOC. I’m sure that the feministing editors are entirely open to RESPECTFUL, constructive criticism. The only thing you succeeded in doing was making yourself sound childish and rude.

  • Pantheon

    The laundry one is from last week and the cougars one is from today. You can subscribe to them as a podcast on iTunes so you see when a new one comes up, or you can watch them on the infomania website (which has more clips than the iTunes podcast).

  • Renee

    Yeah, I did write my own blog post about this issue and had you bothered to follow the link you would have seen that. (speaking of lazy)
    It is furthermore not counterproductive to point out where a blogger is failing much as you pearl clutchers would like us WOC to be silent about issues that concern us.
    Oh and as for respectful criticism: that smacks of watch your tone darkie so I think I will just dismiss your commentary as irrelevant. Since it seems that Feministing editors dont have a problem with the word fuck I think it is acceptable for me to use it at will.

  • msmolly

    Thanks! I’ve ventured onto the infomania website a few times when I was craving some Sarah Haskins, but I somehow always forget to check it.

  • UhOhitzSaro

    No one is asking you to be silent about issues that matter to you. What can be asked is that you would have A) sent an email to the editors at feministing telling them how you often feel that issues that are important to you are underrepresented B) cross posted your own blog entry into the community blog, with a notation that you were disappointed no editor had covered it.
    Derailing a thread about a silly video isn’t going to change anything, and neither is your accusatory tone. And no, that doesn’t smack of ‘watch your tone darkie’ as you said (which was offensive on so many levels) it’s reminding you that this video will probably get 12 comments, tops, so your rant is unproductive.

  • Shinobi

    It is an unfortunate fact that people don’t really like to be criticized. It is difficult to find flaws in your own actions and more difficult when someone else waves them in your face. I find that when I am making a critical point or pointing out something that may be hard for others to see, it can be helpful to maintain a civil or respectful tone and frame the issue in an understanding way.
    I have found that this often makes my concerns and criticisms easier to swallow, which means they are more likely to be addressed. (Though I admit, it is much less gratifying than telling people they are stupid bitches.)
    I do not think that when people confront you about your tone that it is out of a desire to see you silenced. I think it is out of a desire to make sure that your concerns are addressed instead of being dismissed by people who are uncomfortable dealing with how confrontational your concerns are.
    You are free, of course, to express your concerns, criticism and anger, however you want. It could be that anger is an effective strategy for you. It seemed to me that your constructive criticism here was simply being met with other cirticism about what avenues you should take to make sure your concerns are being addressed.

  • FrumiousB

    I grant that Renee is a little aggressive in her tone, but one thing I have learned from feminism is that when a member of a less privileged group speaks about her perceptions and experiences, we should listen. There’s a lot of denial in the responses to her. I think we should consider whether she’s right and whether we could do a better job of bringing articles concerning POC and WOC to light. We all have the opportunity, whether as a feministing blogger, as a community blogger, or by leaving links in the comments section of the community round up posts.

  • Ruby

    Suggesting that someone phrase their criticisms in a more respectful, productive way is not telling them to “watch their tone, darkie”.
    I resent that. How should I even know what ethnicity you are and how should you know mine?
    Lashing out at people, being aggressive and confrontational when an issue could be addressed in a simple, civil manner is not the best way to accomplish something. People are much more likely to relate to what you’re saying if you make an attempt to communicate it in a thoughtful, considerate way. Asking someone to consider the impression or effectiveness of their words isn’t asking much. And it certainly doesn’t imply that I think you should shut up about race issues.

  • Punchbuggy Green

    This statement:”Lashing out at people, being aggressive and confrontational when an issue could be addressed in a simple, civil manner is not the best way to accomplish something.” = policing tone. You might not have been doing it on purpose, but that’s what it is. If you’ve missed the extensive discussions on way policing someone’s tone is counterproductive (at best) or silencing (at worst), then I’ll post you some links if you’d like.

  • Gular

    I think this may be one of those instances where you need to use the capabilities of the Community Blog to that end. It’s also your duty as a Community member to bring attention to these situations as well. While it’s not perpetually your duty, if something like what you’ve mentioned is so important to you, you can bring the attention it needs by yourself. If it gains enough attention and the mods think it’s a really important thing to bring to the front page, it’ll get moved. Just like every other post moved from the community page.
    I’m not saying there isn’t under representation, because a lot of the stories are either directly or primarily about white women and their experiences within the patriarchy/systems of oppression.
    To that end, I think a call-out was needed. However, I think this would be something better suited for the Community Blog for all of us to discuss together there. Not in something which is both feminist and designed to be a bit more light-hearted in its aim. This is not to silence you, but just to raise another alternative.
    You may have already done this as I’ve not been over there yet.

  • Zailyn

    I’m aware that you’re probably trying to be genuinely helpful here, but the fact is that the tone argument is a derailing counter that gets used a *lot* by majority groups to dismiss or otherwise silence minority groups’ concerns – especially in the context of racism, and *especially* when adressing WOC’s concerns. Criticising Renee’s tone is this discussion is not a neutral act, but rather builds up on huge amounts of race-specific silencing and hurt that have gone before. This is a link you may want to look at, and there are tons more resources on the matter on various anti-racism sites.
    In general, I wish people in this discussion would keep in mind that these are not isolated incidents – neither the various criticisms that are being levied at Renee, nor Feministing’s failure to report on a race-based issue which originally sparked Renee’s comment. Failing to take into account the history here misses the point.

  • Zailyn

    Thank you so much – this is it exactly. I’m highly disappointed in the reaction Renee got – even if you don’t agree with her, dismissing her concerns because you as the member of the privileged group don’t think they’re valid is *exactly* what we decry when men do it about feminist issues.

  • nakedthoughts

    Um… wow. thanks for helping me realize my initial defensive reaction to Renee was not necessarily the reaction I should have.
    It is not the job of the Oppressed to spoon feed the oppressor and show them the way. White feminists don’t like doing this for men, why would a WOC want to spoon feed me about racist issues? By saying it is YOUR DUTY as a community member to fix US is really inappropriate.
    I also noticed that a few of the the stories today were about POC and immigrant issues as one of the above posters mentioned. But I probably notice them because they are different from the norm. As a culture we are socialized that white= normal. So of course everything else stands out to me. I haven’t gone through to see what percentage of Feministing posts are about interlocking systems of oppression, POC issues, vs White middle class issues vs other stuff.
    I do appreciate some humor interjected into my life. There are a lot of issues right now for me. So I was glad to take a break. So Personally an occasional humorous post is nice. but that doesn’t mean that the other issues should not be addressed.
    And thank you to Zailyn for the link. I really appreciate the reminder.

  • Candace

    I’m sorry, but responding that a little respect might go a long way to a post that calls fellow posters “pearl clutchers” is an unnecessary derailment? How is asking for a little civility a racist, privilege-blind aggressive act? Had someone used a name-calling tone like that that denigrated a minority or female group, that poster would have had more than their tone silenced; they would have had their post edited.
    A poster’s race doesn’t excuse name-calling of their fellow posters, and asking for that to be stopped isn’t racist. It’s common decency.
    Sincerely,
    Pearl clutcher

  • Renee

    glad that you are owning the identity and signing your post with pearl clutcher..now perhaps you could move beyond your silencing behavior.

  • Renee

    Lashing out at people, being aggressive and confrontational when an issue could be addressed in a simple, civil manner is not the best way to accomplish something. People are much more likely to relate to what you’re saying if you make an attempt to communicate it in a thoughtful, considerate way.

    And this completes the racist bingo card….Of course you are not silencing or disciplining, how could I ever be so confused. Or please don’t beat this poor ole body. I’s a try to stay in line next time mussus.

  • Renee

    You know Gular I do understand why you make that suggestion and had this blog not had a history of either being slow to report on issues important to WOC or ignored the issue altogether I would absolutely agree with you that the community would be a viable option.
    To be honest, I hate having to come here and do the call out thing. I hate the silencing and disciplining behavior but should I or other WOC back away it leaves this space open to being an echo chamber of assent. Yes the call out hurt and stings but it has to be done otherwise there is no change and no growth.
    It sucks for me when a reader points out where I have missed something. The major difference it seems to me, is that no matter how many times WOC engage here there is no recognizable change. The comment threads are hostile and little is said by the bloggers. If feminism is meant to belong to all then it has to reflect the concerns of ALL women.

  • AtrociousR

    Hey, people don’t listen to me when I make personal attacks on them. I know! I’ll keep making personal attacks on them! That’ll make them listen to me!
    If you really care about people paying attention to what you have to say, you might want to do it in such a way that it’s hard for them to come up with an easy excuse to brush you off, such as “Wow, that kid has the manners of a warthog”.
    Or maybe you don’t care and you just like putting people down. Honestly, I can’t really tell.
    Cheers!

  • Laura

    Hey Renee,
    I just want to thank you (sincerely!) for all the work you do to make sure that places like Feministing (and other blogs run by white women such as myself) don’t become echo chambers.
    The input of WOC is vital to our communities and should be central, not secondary to the commentary of white women. Given the level of dismissal you’re getting, I just wanted to speak up and say that so you know that there is at least one white woman who tries to get it, and really DOES appreciate your input, and is seriously impressed by your strength in the face of the privileged ignorance of others.
    And you’re absolutely right – I love Sarah Haskins and these videos are funny, but Feministing can count me as one of those who’d rather see more focus on WOC in this blog than YET ANOTHER post about Sarah Haskins – someone who we’re all familiar with ALREADY anyway!

  • Gular

    I’m actually not talking about spoon feeding at all. I fully and readily admit that it’s not the complete place of the minority to educate the majority about trends/issues affecting them. Even the subtle racism here, and remember I *do* agree with her, needs to be talked about and called out for what it is — racism.
    It’s a style difference on this issue. I, personally, feel like bringing this – again VERY IMPORTANT – issue to this thread feels more like an angry derail than something that could, and should, be productive to the community and how we need to be more sensitive/aware of issues affecting POC and interlocking social issues. I’m not an apologist for the racism here.
    I’m not chastising her for what she did — as I said originally, it needs to be addressed. I just personally thought that there could be a more productive avenue by which to do that.
    I’m telling no one else how to feel. I’m telling no one else how to do anything. In fact, I made a suggestion to go to the Community blog as blogging about the site (which I and many others have done) has been productive for dialogue about issues contained within site and which are pervasive through out feminism.
    I didn’t tell her that her ideas were unfounded and I certainly didn’t tell her that what she did was wrong. Just that I thought perhaps it was better made as a Community post, instead of an angry comment here.

  • Gular

    I was going to “This” this earlier, but I was at work.

  • Gular

    I definitely agree with you — especially on the echo chamber. Silence gives the impression of assent and remaining silent is completely unacceptable.
    As far as hostile commenting, this is a hostile community. It seems that it matters very little as the threads here turn into a screaming match as soon as someone says “I disagree” with anything in a post. While it’s helped me learn a lot, there’s a huge lack of empathy here — especially when it comes to comments that are racist or transphobic.
    I still think, personally, a community post would be helpful, even if it’s a place where you can take all your feelings on this and air them out at once. I know you seem uninterested in doing it, and I’m not in a position to do it for any of the POC on this site as I’m, admittedly, not as acquainted with issues affecting POC and would lack relevant examples to back up the sentiment.
    I’d also like to thank you for not yelling at and disparaging me. Usually when I comment with a “I’m totally on board! Perhaps you may want to do this; it might help?” I get something along the lines of a “fuck you” as a response from the original commenter. It’s refreshing to see someone who can respond instead of yell when someone offers a small critique.

  • Qi

    Is cougar always a sexist term that means an older woman preying on a younger man?
    One of my coworkers is 30 and he has a girlfriend of 36 who he jokingly calls cougar.

  • Pantheon

    I think it refers to a woman who dates younger men, usually with the woman being the one who makes the first moves (but what’s wrong with that?). It also usually means the woman is unusually attractive for her age (for the younger men to be interested), so it could be that he’s seeing it as a compliment or a silly joke. I think it would be kind of like if I called my boyfriend a cradle-robber because he’s 5 years older than me– just a silly comment that doesn’t really mean anything.

  • Clix

    This. Does anyone else not see the irony in a commenter complaining that others are derailing her comment thread when her comment took a tangent from the post in the first place?
    I think the concern is valid. I don’t think this is the best spot for it.

  • ElleStar

    What I’ve noticed in replies to her comments, is not so much disagreeing with her position, but questioning whether or not this is the appropriate place to bring them up.
    Out of the ten articles on the main page, one of which is appropriately titled “What We Missed,” she chose this post to derail the comments.
    Yes, this post shows the funnier, more frivolous side of feminist and female experiences by humorously pointing out what is silly in advertising. So what? It’s not taking the place of other posts, as I’ve said before. So why unload on the Feministing authors and the readers of this post instead of making a community post or sending a link to the site’s authors? I just don’t understand.
    For what it’s worth, I think that Renee’s points are valid and I like her blog very much. I just don’t think that derailing a thread (didn’t we have an uproar a few weeks ago about this very topic) is the way to go about bringing up her points, no matter how valid they are.

  • Candace

    Ha, right, cause me changing my tone isn’t silencing at all, because ummmm, I’m assumedly white? You make a mockery of yourself when you treat others with the exact prejudice and lack of respect that you feel treated with.

  • Jessica Lee

    Haha, men doing laundry!
    That was my favorite part.

  • Mina

    “If you really care about people paying attention to what you have to say, you might want to do it in such a way that it’s hard for them to come up with an easy excuse to brush you off, such as ‘Wow, that kid has the manners of a warthog’.”
    In other words, “you have a good point, speak your audience’s language to spread the word more effectively” instead of “you have a bad point, now watch your tone darkie to spread the word less effectively,” right?

  • Freedom

    This video is incredibly sexist, to both women and men, for a start- men have dirty clothes too and they are not as this stereotype might suggest utterly incapable of doing there own laundry.
    As a second point I would have to say that clean clothes are clean to be hygienic and pleasant and are NOT the main core of what women love and what all there energy and aspirations are poured into. What a thought that I should be expected to host the same love for cleaning up after a household and love every moment of it!
    Well that is certainly nowhere near reality!
    This video sickeningly promotes a massive patriarchy view, and in the name of the mere thought of the video coming back to me I must express a very angry WTF?!
    Honestly what is the purpose in all accomplishments throughout history when getting this far and then women… encouraging these stereotypes? Which I will thank you very much does not apply to the rest of the majority.
    The product of this… thing is for us (at the very least) to set these ridiculous ideas to the right and fighting for the equality in every respect of life- I refer back to the top of these comments where other issues of the WOC- and I agree that that will forever take the priority.
    But what I will say for this defence is that until all types of sexist material is corrected of abolished however small or seemingly insignificant the subtle or sometimes not so subtle communications of sexism are- we could never be free or respected to the levels that all women deserve.

  • Freedom

    This video is incredibly sexist, to both women and men, for a start- men have dirty clothes too and they are not as this stereotype might suggest utterly incapable of doing there own laundry.
    As a second point I would have to say that clean clothes are clean to be hygienic and pleasant and are NOT the main core of what women love and what all there energy and aspirations are poured into. What a thought that I should be expected to host the same love for cleaning up after a household and love every moment of it!
    Well that is certainly nowhere near reality!
    This video sickeningly promotes a massive patriarchy view, and in the name of the mere thought of the video coming back to me I must express a very angry WTF?!
    Honestly what is the purpose in all accomplishments throughout history when getting this far and then women… encouraging these stereotypes? Which I will thank you very much does not apply to the rest of the majority.
    The product of this… thing is for us (at the very least) to set these ridiculous ideas to the right and fighting for the equality in every respect of life- I refer back to the top of these comments where other issues of the WOC- and I agree that that will forever take the priority.
    But what I will say for this defence is that until all types of sexist material is corrected of abolished however small or seemingly insignificant the subtle or sometimes not so subtle communications of sexism are- we could never be free or respected to the levels that all women deserve.

  • Ariel

    sat.ire- the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, denoucing vice, folly, etc.
    You’re obviously unfamiliar with Sarah Haskins. I suggest you look her up. Her sarcasm and satire is used to point out the lunacy of sexist and patriarchal standards placed on women.

  • Karen Maguire

    And now you’re impersonating a slave?
    Wow.
    I’ve had people criticize my tone on here and I’m white, just to let you know.
    I’m not sure if you’ve already done this or not, but can we get a link to your blog? I’d like to check it out minute by minute, to make sure you’re not letting all of the important issues slide a.k.a. being racist. Oh just kidding. Darkie’s aren’t the only one with sass around here.
    P.S. My heart goes out to the mother of the murdered boy and I’m glad you’ve drawn attention to that news, but that’s pretty much the only thing I’m glad you have mentioned. I’ve always found Feministing to be a site that has consistently sent the message of equality among races and has done a great job voicing the concerns of minorites, whether it be from the editors or “the little people” who share thoughts and articles in the community forum. That’s really not something many sites can pride themselves on. Good Job, feministing!

  • Napalm Nacey

    I wanted to add my voice to the “Go Renee” choir. I really do appreciate your comments, they always help me see things in a different way and alert me to things that I might not be aware of. And I empathise with your anger. I’m so sorry to hear about that young man, and it makes me angry that things like this still happen. I don’t really know what else to say. In instances like this I prefer to shut up and listen, but I wanted you to know that I’m listening.