The Five Stages of Feminism

First time poster here with some thoughts to share…

The more my feminist self has been exploring, learning, and questioning, the more I am realizing that I am going through a process quite similar to the Kübler-Ross model of grief.  This model lays out five different stages that people often go through during grief and they remarkably match the emotions and thoughts that I have gone through in my feminism.  (Note: not everyone completes all stages in this particular order.  Some get stuck in various stages for long periods of time before moving on – or even get stuck permanently.)

Stage 1: Denial – ignoring or just unaware of the sexism around us, perhaps thinking “its not that bad”.  It took me a long time to put the pieces of the patriarchy puzzle together and realize the larger scale of sexism and the grand implications.

Stage 2: Anger – and lots of it!  I often found myself just furious thinking “How can this be acceptable!?!?   Don’t people see this!?  Don’t people care!?”  This was my strongest and longest stage. 

Stage 3: Bargaining – the Kubler-Ross model described this as “trying to avoid the situation”.  At one point I wished to unlearn everything I had learned and go back to blissful ignorance.  Of course I couldn’t and of course I wouldn’t if I were really able, but I wanted to escape what I was finding out and the implications of that on my life and relationships.

Stage 4: Depression – the situation sinks in and is overwhelming.   There seems to be no hope.  "How can I, as one person, stand up against a system of sexism where feminism is not even taken seriously?  What hope is there for change when I can’t even convince my own boyfriend!?!?"

Stage 5: Acceptance – this was described in the model as “peace and understanding” – I’ve definitely gained much more understanding and feel more secure and solid on my feminist foundation where I can hold my own in a debate and have actually gotten the feminist light to go off in my boyfriends head!  I don’t know if I’ve reach “peace”…but here is hoping for that ultimate goal!

Thoughts, comments, etc?

Thanks!