Mama Said Knock You Out: Fighting’ Feminism

I have always been aware that feminism, and those who hold feminist beliefs, is deeply linked to many tenants of non-violence and a majority of women I know who identify as feminist also embrace the ideas of pacifism and non-violent living. And that’s a admirable thing, which I respect them greatly for. However, it’s become a bit of an issue between myself (and a few of my friends) and several feminists that we all know mutually. And here’s the rub:
I belong to a gym that offers sessions and classes in both boxing, martial arts, and what’s referred to as MMA (mixed martial arts or ultimate fighting). These classes are women only and taught and referred by women who have been in the sport for a long time. And a lot of times, we’ll hold friendly sparring and fighting bouts, just to train and test each other, and most of the time, we’re allowed to invite friends and family to watch and cheer us on. A few weeks ago, some friends of mine who are open feminists came to see a friendly match between me and a friend. Now, during an MMA match, one of the ways you can win is to “tap out” the other person (which pretty much means getting them into some kind of chokehold or headlock that will cause them to tire or lose breath and therefore submit). You can also win by straight knocking out the other person (which can involve knocking them out or just causing them to go down and stay down). It is common during an MMA match to get struck many times, bleed heavily (especially from the head) and display injuries like cut lips, black eyes, ect. Well, the match ended with both me and her banged up pretty bad. I approached my friends after the match (which ended with a hug, by the way), and they were appalled. One of them said that she could not believe that two women could do that to one another. I didn’t understand, and asked her to elaborate a bit. She continued by asking how I could call myself a feminist after taking part in something like that. She stated that two women attacking each other, beating each other, causing that much physical damage to each other, couldn’t really feminists. “Violence is never feminist!” she argued, going on to say that violence, which is so often used against women, could never be something we should accept or do ourselves. And it perplexed me.
And I don’t agree with her. I have wracked my brain, but I still seem unable to see her side of the argument. Yes, sports like those I take part in are violent. They involve injuries, blood, and the like. But so do many sports. And I’d argue that violence itself, or taking part in a violent sport, doesn’t disqualify one from being a feminist. My friend seemed especially upset by the fact that, at one point, I did manage to get my opponent flipped over and into a basic chokehold to try to tap her out. Perhaps this triggered her (I don’t know her background enough to know if she was ever victimized), and I now realize that I probably should have warned her that MMA is a very violent sport. But I still think that taking part in something like MMA doesn’t mean one can’t support feminism. Yes, I tried to choke out my opponent. She tried to knock me out several times. We kicked and punched and struck each other. That’s the nature of our matches. And I’m not totally convinced that violence, in and of itself, is always wrong. For instance, if a woman resisted a rape or other attack with violence, I doubt anyone here would think less of her for it. So I’m cynical to the argument that violence is always, always bad. And I don’t think women who choose to engage in violent sport are less feminist for it. For me, the key is that it is happened in the context of SPORT. What everyone saw that day were two athletes who had trained and learned and practiced for a long time running up to our match, and a display of strength, skill, and determination from us both. We’re friends, and we understand that we are opponents within the confine of the fight, and then, we leave it behind. The violence itself is a part of the sport, but it is not indicative of ill will, malice, or the like. And I think that’s what distinguishes it – that the violence of MMA and our match is not attached (usually) to any bad feelings or desire to harm, embarrass, or injure the other person – it’s a part of the sport that we take part in. And from the angle, I really don’t think that feminism is enhanced or harmed by taking part in such things. I appreciate my friend’s input, but I am not a non-violent feminist, and I don’t think that makes me any lesser.

Disclaimer: This post was written by a Feministing Community user and does not necessarily reflect the views of any Feministing columnist, editor, or executive director.

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