Why Samantha Bee Rocks My World

This is an oldie-but-goodie; Samantha Bee reflects on her discovery at the RNC that there’s a new c-word that’s not to be uttered. Transcript below the jump.


We went to the Xcel center, we were there for a long time. There was a distinct lack of energy, almost like the vitality of a man approaching his eighties. It felt like there was desiccated flesh in the air.
Man: This woman is qualified.
Samantha: Tell me about her qualifications.
Man: One, she’s a beautiful lady.

It sapped the life out of us.
Samantha: You be Sarah Palin and I’ll be her 17-year old daughter.
Woman: Bristol, you and I have always been able to openly discuss things –
Samantha: What do you want to talk to me about, I’m totally busy right now mommm, can you get out of my room?
Man: It’s very inappropriate that Democrats have seized on the issue of Bristol’s pregnancy…
Woman: That is a personal, that is very personal…

They had eradicated the word “choice” from their vocabulary.
Man: She said “No, it’s a human being.”
Samantha: She made the – I’m sorry what is – the decision, the decision…there’s another word I’m looking for.
Samantha: It rhymes with – I think it rhymes with “voice.”

I did not run into one person who did not share that opinion at the Xcel center that day.
Samantha: Every woman should have the right to – I’m sorry what’s the word I’m looking for?
Everybody got the memo. We’re not going to talk about choice anymore.
Samantha: We have a lot options, and you have to select one…there’s a word I’m looking for, what is it…
Woman: Adoption.
Younger woman: I’m sure the family will be able to make the best decision for them.
Samantha: But they’ll have the freedom to make that decision.
Woman: Freedom of choice? That’s different than being pro-choice.

The c-word word used to be something else. Now it’s choice.
Younger woman: Well, yes, but I don’t think that the…I don’t think that the decision…I think it should be…not…I think that…I think the family decision would be, uh, as how…yes, okay.
Everybody says “cunt” all the time now. Noooo biggie. But nobody’s saying the word “choice.”

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